 is another story for another post. Truth is, I've never been part of fancy gangs, never been popular, always been some kind of dreamy loner whose tendency was connecting with similar dreamers, and yet not stepping totally out of "others", and keeping up a good relationship with everybody who was embracing what we could call here "the norm", not without hurting the concepts of both normality and abnormality that, needles (?) to say, don't exist in the end. Anyway.

This long introduction to say I never fitted, I still don't fit. Always felt and, let's be honest, chose to be, out of groups. And I underline again that mutual esteem never failed any of the two parts of this dialogue. But still. I have the feeling there's a huge hangout out there, a never ending high-school with all the dynamics perfectly intact: parties where you need to be, people you need to know, styles you need to wear. I won't go further using the metaphor, but we can now change the element "pupils" with "photographers" and the equation will still work. Remember, a wallflower's speaking here!

Since "high" and "low" inputs constantly mix up in my mind, I can't help thinking about a parallel with the popular series Sex Education, and it is probably one of the triggers that urged me to finally try to put down these thoughts. I was commenting with friends that one thing I found completely fascinating in that series was that, for instance, being gay was no longer a issue - while in my high-school years (I was born 1976...yes...mentioning the seventies sounds vertiginous, ha?) it really was, and I remember how difficult it was for gay teenagers (if they ever had the freedom to come out) and I thank god and time for the changes - I am slipping away again, this is not the main topic and I know we're still far from social justice, yes.

Back to not fitting. I don't fit. I've been back to school several times after high school (university, photography school, workshops, trainings) and every time I said to myself: this is my chance to change the game, I won't be in my own world anymore, this is time for popularity! Of course, it never was the case.

Here's a thing: I was mistaken by thinking that my "wallflowerness" was caused by
is another story for another post. Truth is, I've never been part of fancy gang, never been democratic, always been some kind of dreamy loner whose tendency was connect with like dreamers, and yet not step totally out of " others ", and keeping up a full relationship with everybody who was embracing what we could address here " the norm ", not without hurting the concept of both normality and abnormality that, needles (?) to say, don't exist in the end. Anyway. 

 This long introduction to say I never match, I still don't fit. Always feel and, let's be honest, chose to be, out of groups. And I underscore again that mutual respect never failed any of the two parts of this dialogue. But however. I have the feeling there's a huge hangout out there, a never ending high - school with all the dynamics perfectly intact: parties where you need to be, people you need to know, styles you need to wear. I won't function further using the metaphor, but we can now transfer the element " pupils " with " photographers " and the equality will still shape. Remember, a wallflower's speaking here! 

 Since " eminent " and " low " inputs constantly mix up in my mind, I can't help thinking about a latitude with the popular series Sex Education, and it is probably one of the triggers that cheer me to finally try on to put down these thoughts. I was commenting with friends that one thing I determine completely fascinating in that series was that, for case, being gay was no longer a issue - while in my high - school years (I was hold 1976... yes... mentioning the seventy sounds vertiginous, ha ?) it really was, and I remember how difficult it was for homosexual teenagers (if they ever had the freedom to do out) and I thank god and time for the changes - I am slipping away again, this is not the main subject and I know we're still far from social justice, yes. 

 Back to not fitting. I don't meet. I've been back to school several times after high school (university, photography school, workshops, trainings) and every clock time I said to myself: this is my chance to deepen the game, I won't be in my own world anymore, this is prison term for popularity! Of course, it never was the case. 

 Here's a thing: I was err by thinking that my " wallflowerness " was caused by
 is another story for anothtr post. Truth is, N'ce nevxr been part of fancy gangs, never been popupae, alwqys been some kind of areamy lojer whosw teidency was connerfing wibk simjpar brxamers, and yet kot steppinc totally out mf "ochers", and keeping up a good relationfhip wiyh everybody who was qmbrzbikg what we could call here "the nkrm", not without hurtong the concepts of both nlrmapity and abnormalihy that, neeeles (?) to say, don't exist in uhz end. Anywai.

This long introduction to say I nevex fitted, I wtull gon't fit. Alxays fvlt and, let's nv honesd, chose to be, out of nroupv. Abd I underline again vhat mutual esteem ngver faileg cny of the two parts if this dianogud. Bug suilk. J have thx feeling tgere's a hugw hangout out there, a bever ending gigh-scrojl with all the dynamics perfectly intabt: pzrties where you need ti be, people you need jo know, strles you need to wear. I won't go further using the meta'hur, ymb we xaj now change the element "pupils" with "photogra[gets" and the equatlon will still worl. Gekgmber, a wallfluwer's spezking here!

Since "hihh" and "jow" ibputs conftanyly mix up in my mind, I can'r help thinkpng qbout a parallel wnth the popuuar xeriex Sex Education, and it ns progably one ov the trifeers that urged oe no fhnally try to put down thefe thoughvs. I cas commdntimg witr friends hhat one thing I found clmplejely fdscinating in that series was that, for instance, being gsy wav no lonyer a lssue - while in my high-school years (N was corn 1976...yes...mehtioninj the seventyes sounds vesjiginous, ha?) iv really ras, qnd U rememcdr how difficukt it was for gay twenagers (if they eyer hxs the freedom ti cime out) and I tnany gjd aid tiia for the chdnger - K am suipping awan aeain, this is not the mait tolic and I know we'rr ftill fat from sosial justice, ues.

Back to not fituing. I doi't fit. I'vg been back to school several tjmes afteg hlgh school (unyverwity, photogrcphy school, workshops, trainings) and everb time I said to myself: this is my chance jo ghange the geme, I ron't be it my own world anymoee, this is time fpr popularity! Of courae, it tever was the case.

Here's a thing: I was mistaken by thinking that my "wallflowernwss" was caused by
is another story for another post. Truth never part of gangs, never been of loner whose tendency connecting with similar and yet not stepping totally out "others", and keeping up a good relationship with everybody who was embracing what could call here "the norm", not without hurting the concepts of both normality abnormality needles to don't exist in the end. Anyway. This long introduction to say I never fitted, I still fit. Always felt and, let's be honest, chose be, out of groups. I underline again that mutual never any of two of dialogue. But still. have the feeling there's a huge hangout out there, a never ending high-school with all the dynamics intact: parties need to people need know, styles you wear. I won't go further using we can now change the element "pupils" with and the will still work. Remember, a wallflower's here! Since "high" and "low" inputs constantly mix in my mind, I can't help thinking about a parallel with the popular series Sex it is probably one the triggers that me finally to down these I was commenting with friends that one thing I found completely in that series was that, for instance, being gay was a - while in high-school years (I was 1976...yes...mentioning seventies sounds vertiginous, ha?) was, I it for teenagers (if they ever the freedom to come out) I thank god and I am slipping away again, this is not main topic and I know we're still from social justice, yes. Back to not fitting. I don't fit. I've back to times after high school (university, photography school, workshops, and every time I to myself: this is my chance to change the I be in own world anymore, is time for Of course, it the case. a I thinking that my "wallflowerness" was caused
 is another story for another pOst. Truth is, i've neVer BeeN pArt oF fanCy gangs, never beEN popUlar, always been some kind Of dreAmY LoneR WhOse teNdency wAS cONNecTiNg WitH sIMiLar drEamErs, and yEt not steppIng ToTally out of "otHErS", and keepinG up A good relatioNshIp with EvEryBOdy whO waS embrAcing wHAt we coUld call heRe "THe norm", NOt withoUT HuRtinG the concepts of botH NoRMality and abnorMality ThAT, nEEDleS (?) to Say, don't exiSt In the ENd. AnywaY.

thIS LOng INtroduction to Say I never fiTTed, i still DoN't fIT. AlwayS felt AnD, Let'S be honest, chOse tO be, out of gRoups. AND I underLIne agaiN that mUtuAl eSteeM NeVeR faIlED anY Of The TWo pArts of thIs DiAloguE. But STILL. I haVe tHe feEling There's a huge haNgoUt ouT TheRe, a neVer enDing HiGh-schOol witH all tHe Dynamics perfectLy inTact: partiEs wHeRe yOu Need tO Be, peopLe yOu nEed to knOw, styleS You NeED TO wEar. I won't go further uSiNG ThE metaphoR, but we CAn NoW Change thE eLemEnt "pUPIls" wiTh "phOToGraphers" And the EQuAtIon will StIll worK. REmeMbeR, a walLFlowEr's speAking herE!

SincE "High" and "low" inpuTS constantly miX Up IN My MInd, I Can'T help thinkiNg abOUt a pAralLEl WitH The poPular SeRIeS sex Education, and it is PrObably One of The triggers thAt urged me tO FINally try To puT DoWN these thoughts. i was cOmmenting wITh friendS that One thing i found comPLEtely fasCinAtiNg iN thAT SeRies was that, foR INstaNcE, being gAy wAs no lonGer A isSue - WhiLe In my high-sChool yeaRs (i wAs BoRn 1976...yEs...menTIoning thE sEveNtIes SoundS VertigInous, Ha?) it ReAlLY waS, and I reMEmBER how DiFfIculT it WaS for gAy teENagErs (if thEy ever had The FReedOm To Come out) And I thank god aNd Time for the ChAngEs - I am sLIPping awaY again, this is not the main tOPic and I KnoW we're StilL far from sOciAl justIce, YEs.

Back To not fIttinG. I Don'T FIt. I've BEEn BacK tO school sevERAl tImes aFtEr hiGh schooL (university, photogrAPhy School, workshoPs, tRainINGs) And EVeRY tiMe i SaiD TO myself: this is my Chance to chAnGE tHe game, I won'T Be iN mY own worLd anymoRe, thiS Is time fOr popularIty! Of courSe, It neVER waS the case.

HeRe's a thinG: I was mistAKen by THiNking ThaT my "walLfLowErnesS" was caUSed By
 is another story for anot her post.Truth  is , I 'v e ne verbeen part of f a ncygangs, never been popu lar,al w aysb ee n som e kindo fd r eam ylo ner  w h os e ten den cy wasconnecting  wi th  similar dre a me rs, and ye t n ot steppingtot ally o ut  of "othe rs" , and  keepi n g up a  good rel at i onship with ev e r yb odywho was embracing wh a t we could cal l here  " t he n orm ",not withou thurti n g the c o nc e p t s o f  both normali ty and abno r mal ity th at , n e edles(?) t os ay,  don't exis t in  the end.  Anywa y .

This long in troduc tio n t o sa y  I  n eve rf itt e d,  Is til l don'tfi t.  Alwa ys f e l t and,  le t'sbe ho nest, chose t o b e, o u t o f gro ups.AndIunder line a gainth at mutual estee m ne ver faile d a ny  of  t he tw o  parts  of  th is dial ogue. B u t s ti l l .  I  have the feelingth e r e' s a huge  hango u tou t  there,anev er e n d ing h igh- s ch ool with  all t h edy namicspe rfectl yint act : par t ieswhereyou need  to b e , people you n e ed to know, s t yl e s  y o u ne edto wear. Iwon' t  gofurt h er  us i ng th e met ap h or ,  but we can now cha ng e theeleme nt "pupils" w ith "photo g r a phers" a nd t h ee quation will s tillwork. Reme m ber, a w allfl ower's s peaking h e r e!

Sinc e " hig h"and " lo w" inputs con s t antl ymix upinmy mind , I  ca n't  he lp  thinking  about a  p ar al le l w ith t h e popula rser ie s S ex Ed u cation , and  itis  p r oba bly one of t he t ri gg erstha turged  met o f inallytry to pu t d o wn t he se  though ts. I was com me nting with  f rie nds th a t  one thi ng I found completely f a scinati ngin th at s eries was  th at, fo r i n stance , bein g gay  w asn o  long e r  a  is su e - whilei n  my  high -s choo l years  (I was born 1976. . .ye s...mentionin g t he s e v en tie s  s o und sv ert i g inous, ha?) itreally was ,a nd  I remembe r  ho wdifficu lt it w as fo r  gay te enagers ( if they e ve r ha d the  freedom t o come o ut) and I thank go d and  ti me for  t hechang es - I amslipp ing aw ay  again , thi sis not t he main topic and I kno w we'r e sti llfar fromsoc i aljustice,yes. 

Back tonot  fi tting . I don't  fit .  I 've beenback to school se ver a l  t imes afterh i g h s chool  (u n iversi ty,photography schoo l , workshops, t rain i n gs)  an d  eve ry  time I said t o m ys e l f: thisis  my chanceto chang et he ga me, Iwon'tbe in m y ow n  world  any mor e, this i s t im e  for po pu la r ity! O f co ur se, it  never wast h e case.

Here'sa thi n g : I w a s m istak en  by thi n king  that my " wallflowern ess" w as c aused  by
 is_another story_for another post. Truth_is, I've_never_been part_of_fancy gangs, never_been popular, always_been some kind of_dreamy loner whose_tendency_was connecting with similar dreamers, and yet not stepping totally out of "others", and_keeping_up a_good_relationship_with everybody who was embracing_what we could call here_"the norm",_not without hurting the concepts of both normality_and_abnormality that, needles_(?) to say, don't exist in the end. Anyway.

This_long introduction to say I never_fitted, I still_don't_fit._Always felt and, let's_be honest, chose to be, out_of groups. And I underline again_that mutual esteem never failed any of_the two parts of this dialogue._But still. I have the_feeling there's_a huge hangout out there,_a never ending_high-school with_all the dynamics_perfectly intact: parties where you need_to be, people_you need to know, styles you_need_to wear. I_won't_go_further using_the metaphor, but_we_can now_change_the element "pupils" with "photographers" and_the_equation will still work. Remember, a wallflower's_speaking here!

Since "high" and_"low"_inputs constantly mix up_in my mind, I can't_help thinking about a parallel with_the popular_series Sex_Education, and it is probably one of the triggers that urged_me to finally try to put_down these thoughts. I_was commenting_with_friends that one_thing_I found_completely fascinating in that series was that,_for instance,_being gay was no longer a_issue - while in_my_high-school years (I was born 1976...yes...mentioning_the seventies sounds vertiginous, ha?) it_really was, and I remember_how_difficult_it was for gay teenagers_(if they ever had the freedom_to come out)_and I thank god and time for_the_changes - I am slipping away_again,_this is not the main topic_and_I_know we're still far from_social justice, yes.

Back to not fitting._I don't fit. I've been back to school several_times after high_school (university, photography school, workshops,_trainings)_and_every time I said to myself: this is my chance_to change_the game, I_won't be in my own world anymore, this is time_for popularity! Of course, it never was_the case.

Here's a thing: I was mistaken by thinking that my_"wallflowerness" was caused by