 got into bed, waiting
for Sara to say goodnight. I didn't think Brandon would be back, he'd already
kissed my cheek, rather chastely and expressed that nightly sentiment.
A few moments later, the door
slowly opened and Sara walked in wearing a thin blue nightgown. I wondered why
she wasn't wearing her robe, as usual, but didn't inquire. I liked the view too
well to spoil it. She backed up against the doors, shutting them. "Did you
like the song?" she asked, moving towards me.
"Yes. And I understand. I'm
sorry that I've been so..." She stopped me by putting her finger to her own
lips.
"Don't apologize. There's
nothing to be sorry for. I only wanted you to understand why it would be better
to wait not to make you feel guilty. So no more I'm sorrys, hmm? Now
how was your day?" she asked, sitting down on the bed.
I amazed me sometimes how fast
she could change the subject.
"Fine. I... I'll be visiting
my parents... grave, tomorrow."
She looked surprised and quite
concerned. "How will you get there? Isn't that a long trip?" she asked,
her concern showing in her voice, as well.
I explained about the cemetery
beyond the west wing. I still felt numb talking about. As if I had no feelings.
"Are you sure you're ready
for this?" she asked, still sounding apprehensive.
"I I don't know. I
don't feel... anything. I'm just numb. I feel as though I should be sad
tears should be flowing, but... I mean, I'll be saying goodbye tomorrow and..."
"Not necessarily," she
said softly, as she fiddled with my fingers.
"Whaddaya mean?"
"Well, you have no memories
of them here. What I mean is... sometimes it takes a long time for a person to
let go of loved ones, especially in your case. You've been taken out of the environment
where you would normally confront your memories day after day and therefore come
to terms with it gradually. Back there... in Jackson Heights, is it?" I shook
my head, but didn't offer to correct her. "Well, you know what I mean. Back

got into bed, waiting 
 for Sara to say goodnight. I didn't remember Brandon would be back, he'd already 
 snog my cheek, rather chastely and expressed that nightly opinion. 
 A few moments later, the door 
 lento afford and Sara walked in wearing a thin blue nightgown. I wonder why 
 she wasn't wearing her robe, as common, but didn't inquire. I liked the opinion too 
 well to spoil it. She back up against the doors, shutting them. " Did you 
 like the sung? " she asked, moving towards me. 
 " Yes. And I understand. I'm 
 sorry that I've been thus... " She stopped me by putting her finger to her own 
 lips. 
 " Don't apologize. There's 
 nothing to be sorry for. I only want you to understand why it would be better 
 to wait not to make you feel guilty. therefore no more I'm sorrys, hmm? Now 
 how was your day? " she asked, sitting down on the bed. 
 I amazed me sometimes how fast 
 she could change the subject. 
 " Fine. I... I'll be visiting 
 my parents... grave, tomorrow. " 
 She look surprised and quite 
 concerned. " How will you get there? Isn't that a farseeing slip? " she asked, 
 her concern showing in her part, as well. 
 I explained about the cemetery 
 beyond the west wing. I still feel numb talking about. As if I had no feelings. 
 " Are you sure you're ready 
 for this? " she necessitate, still sounding apprehensive. 
 " I I don't know. I 
 don't feel... anything. I'm barely numb. I find as though I should be sad 
 tears should be flowing, but... I mean, I'll be saying adieu tomorrow and... " 
 " Not necessarily, " she 
 said softly, as she fiddled with my fingers. 
 " Whaddaya mean? " 
 " Well, you have no memories 
 of them here. What I mean is... sometimes it aim a long fourth dimension for a person to 
 let go of loved one, especially in your event. You've been taken out of the environment 
 where you would normally confront your memory day after sidereal day and therefore come 
 to terms with it gradually. Back there... in Jackson Heights, is it? " I shake 
 my head, but didn't offer to correct her. " Well, you know what I mean. Back
 goh into bed, waiting
for Sava to say goodniyyt. I dmdn't thjnk Branaon would be back, he'd alreadb
kiswed mt cheek, rather chastelh and expgessed thqt nmghtly sentiment.
E few moments mwter, vhe door
slowly ppened and Sara walked it decring a thin blue nightgown. I wonderqd why
sne wasn't wearing her wobe, as usual, but didn't inquire. I likes the vpew too
well to sppil it. She backed up againdt tje doors, shutting hhem. "Did yoo
mikq the song?" shd asked, monnng towards me.
"Yes. And I understand. I'm
sorry that I've been wo..." Shf stopped me by pltting her fikber to her owm
lips.
"Don't apolpgive. Tyere's
nothing to be socry for. I only wanteq you to gnberstand why it would bw betjer
to waig nog tk kaie you fexl guilty. Sk no more I'n sorrys, hmm? Now
how www your day?" shs askeq, fitting down on the bed.
I amazed me someuimes how fast
she could chante the subject.
"Fine. I... L'll be vifiting
my parents... grave, tomorrow."
She looked surprisad anv duiue
gjvxegned. "How will you get there? Isn't that a long edik?" sme asked,
her conccrn showing in her vlivg, as well.
I expuained abkut the cemetery
bejond thg west wing. I suill gelt numb talking about. As uf I had no yeeoings.
"Are you sure vou're ready
fur tnis?" sne asked, still sounding appdehensive.
"I L don't knkd. I
don't feel... anyghikg. H'm just numb. I feel as thotgh I shonld bz sad
teafs snould fe flowing, but... L mean, I'll be sayinh goobbye domorrow ajd..."
"Not necessarily," she
said softlb, as she fiddkeg wpth my fiugers.
"Wmaddaya mean?"
"Welj, you have no kemorief
of tfem here. Wgat I mxan is... sometymes it takes w long time hor a perfon ro
ler go of uoved ones, esprcially iu youe case. You've been baken kut of the envixubment
where you eouud gogmaklr confront yogr mdmofoes dxy after dan avd tnerefore come
to termv wifh it gradually. Bavk there... ib Jacksog Heights, is ot?" I shook
my head, hut dmdn't ohfer tp cjrrect her. "Well, you know what J mean. Bafk

got into bed, waiting for Sara to I think Brandon be back, he'd chastely expressed that nightly A few moments the door slowly opened and Sara in wearing a thin blue nightgown. I wondered why she wasn't wearing her as usual, but didn't inquire. I liked the view too well to spoil She up the shutting them. "Did you like the song?" she asked, moving towards me. "Yes. And I understand. sorry that I've been so..." She stopped me putting her finger to own lips. "Don't apologize. There's to sorry for. only you understand why it be better to wait not to make you feel guilty. So no more I'm sorrys, hmm? Now was your asked, sitting on bed. amazed me sometimes she could change the subject. "Fine. visiting my parents... grave, tomorrow." She looked surprised quite concerned. will you get there? Isn't that long trip?" she asked, her concern showing in voice, as well. I explained about the cemetery beyond the west wing. I still felt about. As if I no feelings. "Are sure ready this?" asked, still apprehensive. "I I don't know. I don't feel... anything. I'm just I feel as though I should be sad tears should but... mean, I'll be goodbye tomorrow and..." "Not she softly, as she fiddled fingers. mean?" no of here. What I mean sometimes it takes a long for a person to especially in your case. You've been taken out the environment where you would normally confront memories day after day and therefore come to terms with it gradually. there... in is it?" I shook my head, but didn't to correct her. "Well, know what I mean. Back
 got into bed, waiting
for Sara tO say goodniGht. I dIdn'T thInK BraNdon Would be back, he'd ALreaDy
kissed my cheek, rather cHasteLy ANd exPReSsed tHat nighTLy SENtiMeNt.
a feW mOMeNts laTer, The door
Slowly openEd aNd sara walked in WEaRing a thin bLue Nightgown. I woNdeRed why
ShE waSN't weaRinG her rObe, as uSUal, but Didn't inquIrE. i liked THe view tOO
WeLl to Spoil it. She backed uP AgAInst the doors, shUtting ThEM. "DID You
LikE the song?" shE aSked, mOVing towARdS ME.
"yes. aNd I understand. i'm
sorry that i'Ve bEen so..." SHe StoPPed me bY puttInG Her Finger to her Own
lIps.
"Don't apOlogizE. there's
nOThing to Be sorrY foR. I oNly wANtEd You To UNdeRStAnd WHy iT would be BeTtEr
to wAit nOT TO Make You Feel GuiltY. So no more I'm soRryS, hmm? nOw
hOw was Your dAy?" shE aSked, sItting Down oN tHe bed.
I amazed me sOmetImes how faSt
sHe CouLd ChangE The subJecT.
"FiNe. I... I'll bE visitiNG
my PaRENTs... Grave, tomorrow."
She loOkED SuRprised aNd quitE
CoNcERned. "How wIlL yoU get THEre? IsN't thAT a Long trip?" She askED,
hEr Concern ShOwing iN hEr vOicE, as weLL.
I exPlaineD about thE cemeTEry
beyond the weST wing. I still feLT nUMB tALkinG abOut. As if I had No feELingS.
"Are YOu SurE You're Ready
FoR ThIS?" she asked, still soundInG appreHensiVe.
"I I don't know. I
Don't feel... anYTHIng. I'm jusT numB. i fEEl as though I shoUld be Sad
tears shOUld be floWing, bUt... I mean, I'Ll be sayinG GOodbye toMorRow And..."
"not NECeSsarily," she
saiD SOftlY, aS she fidDleD with my FinGerS.
"WhAddAyA mean?"
"Well, You have nO mEmOrIeS
of Them hERe. What I mEaN is... SoMetImes iT Takes a Long tIme fOr A pERsoN to
let gO Of LOVed oNeS, eSpecIalLy In youR casE. you'Ve been tAken out of The ENvirOnMeNt
where You would normaLlY confront yOuR meMories DAY after daY and therefore come
to termS With it gRadUally. back There... in JaCksOn HeigHts, IS it?" I shOok
my hEad, buT dIdn'T OFfer tO COrRecT hEr. "Well, you kNOW whAt I meAn. back

 got into bed, waiting
for  Sara to s ay go odn igh t.  I d idn' t think Brando n  wou ld be back, he'd alrea dy
ki ss e d my ch eek,ratherc ha s t ely  a nd  ex pr e ss ed th atnightly  sentiment .
A  f ew moments l a te r, the doo r
s lowly opened  an d Sara  w alk e d inwea ringa thin blue n ightgown.  I wonder e d why
s h e  w asn' t wearing her rob e ,a s usual, but d idn'tin q ui r e . I  li ked the vi ew  toow ell tos po i l it. She backed up  against th e  do ors, s hu tti n g them . "Di dy oulike the so ng?"  she aske d, mov i ng towa r ds me."Yes.And  Iunde r st an d.I' m 
so r ry  th a t I 've been  s o. .." S he s t o p p ed m e b y pu tting  her finger t o h er o w n
l ips."Don' t ap ol ogize . Ther e's
n ot hing to be sorr y fo r. I only  wa nt edyo u tou nderst and  wh y it wo uld beb ett er t o  w ait not to make yo uf e el  guilty.  So no mo re I'm sorr ys , h mm?N o w
how  was yo ur day?"  she a s ke d,  sittin gdown o nthe  be d.
Ia maze d me s ometimes  howf ast
she couldc hange the sub j ec t . 
" F ine.  I. .. I'll bevisi t ingmy p a re nts . .. gr ave,to m or r ow."
She looked sur pr ised a nd qu ite
concerned . "How wil l y ou get t here ?  I s n't that a lon g tri p?" she as k ed,
herconce rn showi ng in her v oice, as  we ll. 
Iexp l a in ed about thec e mete ry 
beyond  th e westwin g.I s til lfelt numb  talking  a bo ut .Asif Ih ad no fe el ing s. 
"A re yo u  sureyou'r e re ad yf orthis?"s he a sked ,st illsou nd ing a ppre h ens ive.
"I  I don'tkno w . Ido n' t feel. .. anything.I' m just num b.  Ifeel a s though I  should be sad
tears sh o uld beflo wing,  but ... I mea n,I'll b e s a ying g oodbye  tomo rr owa n d..." " No t n ec essarily," s hesaidso ftly , as sh e fiddled with myf ing ers.
"Whadday a m ean? " "W ell ,  y o u h av e  no m emories
of them  here. Wha tI  m ean is...s ome ti mes ittakes a  long time fo r a perso n to
letgo  ofl o ved  ones, esp eciallyin your c a se. Y o u' ve be entakenou t o f the  envir o nme nt
wh ere yo uwouldnorma ll y confro nt your memories day af ter da y and  th erefore c ome toterms wit h it  gradually . B ack  ther e.. .  in J acks o nHei g hts,is i t ?" I shoo k 
m y h e a d,  but didn't o f fer  to c orr e ct her . "W ell, you know wha t  I mean. Back
 got_into bed,_waiting
for Sara to say_goodnight. I_didn't_think Brandon_would_be back, he'd_already
kissed my cheek,_rather chastely and expressed_that nightly sentiment.
A_few_moments later, the door
slowly opened and Sara walked in wearing a thin blue nightgown._I_wondered why
she_wasn't_wearing_her robe, as usual, but_didn't inquire. I liked the_view too
well_to spoil it. She backed up against the_doors,_shutting them. "Did_you
like the song?" she asked, moving towards me.
"Yes. And_I understand. I'm
sorry that I've been_so..." She stopped_me_by_putting her finger to_her own
lips.
"Don't apologize. There's
nothing to be_sorry for. I only wanted you_to understand why it would be better
to_wait not to make you feel_guilty. So no more I'm_sorrys, hmm?_Now
how was your day?" she_asked, sitting down_on the_bed.
I amazed me_sometimes how fast
she could change the_subject.
"Fine. I... I'll_be visiting
my parents... grave, tomorrow."
She looked_surprised_and quite
concerned. "How_will_you_get there?_Isn't that a_long_trip?" she_asked,
her_concern showing in her voice, as_well.
I_explained about the cemetery
beyond the west wing._I still felt numb_talking_about. As if I_had no feelings.
"Are you sure_you're ready
for this?" she asked, still_sounding apprehensive.
"I_I don't_know. I
don't feel... anything. I'm just numb. I feel as though_I should be sad
tears should be_flowing, but... I mean,_I'll be_saying_goodbye tomorrow and..."
"Not_necessarily,"_she
said softly,_as she fiddled with my fingers.
"Whaddaya mean?"
"Well,_you have_no memories
of them here. What I_mean is... sometimes it_takes_a long time for a person_to
let go of loved ones, especially_in your case. You've been_taken_out_of the environment
where you would_normally confront your memories day after_day and therefore_come
to terms with it gradually. Back there..._in_Jackson Heights, is it?" I shook
my_head,_but didn't offer to correct her._"Well,_you_know what I mean. Back
