ive definitely been like this forever and both my physical and digital organization is an absolute nightmare i shudder thinking about my adobe lightroom library  however i will say that i also think its a bit of a coping mechanism for terrible memory and lessened ability to plan for the future it sucks going through piles and piles of old papers but when it turns out i do need that form i should have thrown away three years ago i have it its just a matter of digging through my disorganized stack of crap until i find it coincidentally i feel like thats also a bit how my mind works no index for lookup or instantaneous recall just a pile of mostly useless crap with a few useful things buried in there somewhere which i might be able to find if i rummage through it all long enough