omg i always thought it was because im just a people pleaser or because i never have any interest on my own thats why i never have any motivation and energy to do things for my own sake  but do anyone else also experience this or is this only because im a bad person that i need someone that i respect or maybe worth pleasing for to be able to do that effectively if its just normal friend or even worse if that person that i respect at first start to open up to me or being my bestfriend i start treat him easily and not make me so motivated to help him  maybe just like how we treat and polish diamond hard to get people everyday but then the diamond value drop when we already being close we start to ignore it or didnt feel any need in polishing