pretty sure dealing with the system will be what pushes me right over the edge the waiting the lack of access the lack of affordability i’m just trying to not take my own life i fight all day everyday all i want is to live but i don’t know how long i can keep going because of this exact kind of scenario and i’m scared and i scared to tell people because last time i did they locked me up without anything that could help me and wouldn’t let me sleep or even talk to anyone