this is exactly what has kept me in therapy for so long and through its persistence with my current therapist led her to suggest i may have adhd very light bulb moment  i am a teacher and its amazing because with all the busyness of being in school i do get some really nice long holidays but i can genuinely feel like i fail at my holidays im a bit better now but my general pattern still follows putting off all sorts of stuff while i was busy with teaching to get done in the holidays i would reach the holidays and be exhausted and so i would want to be getting these things done but not getting them done i would genuinely feel like i was failing at my holiday because i wasnt getting things done but i also wasnt relaxing because i was constantly thinking about getting things done ive tried all manner of approaches from leaving things till the end after i relax or get things done first to get them out of the way none of them work the best i had been able to do was to get away from home for the first couple of nights so i could at least properly switch off but now covid  ill have to admit i havent done much thinking about this yet but this video and the one that follows it feel very insightful and give a frame of thinking about procrastinating in a way i hadnt heard previously how to adhd video - wall of awful