i learnt about this not long ago its called being high functioning ive had adhd depression and anxiety since i was 14 yet bar school councillors and the alternate school i went to where my class was like 6 kids tops everything looks pretty normal from the out side infact ive had people comment how come im not in managerhigher paid positions     well thats because in my head its the total opposite constant anxiety  while simultaneously not having the energy mental or physical to actually act on and fix whats causing said anxiety a healthy dose of short attention span thrown in and ive never got past a weekend supervisor role in jobs until i had my own business but the wrong choice of brewery contract and covid funked all that up as well     im 32 next month and pretty sure its all catching up on me now cant seem to find motivation to do anything beyond just existing and because ive always been high functioning and been pushed to be that way by parents who want one of there kids to not be a fuck up not a single person has noticed how far downhill ive gone let alone that im my head im not planning on making it past age 45