it happens so often its infuriating ò_ó  sometimes i think that i have a hard time really paying attention to reality so i let a lot of things slide and then 2 years later while im procrastinating daydreaming and ruminating about past events it suddenly hits me omg how didnt i realize that this person was insulting me am i that dumb or jesus why didnt i say something im such a doormat  and then i end up avoiding the person i started to resent with a two-year delay and they have no idea wtf is going on and i most certainly dont want to explain it especially because im very conflict-averse and dont want to sound crazy for bringing up an event that the person may not even remember anymore  so yeah i too want to travel back in time to hit people including myself sigh