i think its safe to say everyone with adhd is unique in terms of how they function cognitively in specific situations given certain circumstances  i find myself somewhere between the two descriptions op provided   but wow - i can definitely recognise myself in what you wrote about yourself  i overexert myself in social situations because i constantly hold back my intuitive behaviours and habits such as interrupting people being too loud forgetting to pay attention to other peoples needs etc  ive developed social anxiety due to the fact that i was bullied by my peers and scolded extensively by my parents for exhibiting said behaviour   initially i was diagnosed with anorexia coping method signaling that i was struggling mentally only to find out at the age of 16 that i in fact was autistic  approximately a year ago my gp referred me to a psychiatrist to help me unwrap my mental issues depression anxiety etc   however the psychiatrist immediately suspected that i might have a comorbid add diagnosis - rather than some sort of recurring depression due to unhealed mental scars  and  finally at the age of 23 i received the comorbid diagnosis add   a few months afterwards i started getting medical treatment for which i am eternally grateful   i have come to gain such a deep understanding of my cognitive constellation so to speak allowing me to implement coping strategies etc so that i can be more happy 3  its like the missing pieces to the puzzle of my cognitive issues have all come together to form a clear picture of my anomaly of a brain its wonderful   i dont quite fit the typical descriptions of either diagnosis but in combination it makes much better sense to me