that shit hurts so bad and im sorry youre still going through it with your family after all these years i lived that hell throughout my entire damn childhood  my mom always insisted i didnt respect her and i was lying when i didnt do stuff i said id do if i was lying because i didnt respect her why would i apologise sincerely and insist i didnt mean to forget  she was always on my case about school and even though i knew it was from a place of love it hurt so bad i could never explain what was wrong or why i struggled especially because i was a gifted kid and in all advanced classes i was so sure i was just lazy or weak-willed  i remember once we had a family counselor come in and i was trying to describe what i now know is central executive dysfunction just staring at an assignment pen in hand unable to do something  the counselor told me sometimes you have to just knuckle down and do it hearing that was like getting kicked in the chest a professional confirming my worst fears that the fact that i couldnt just do it was a testament to my lack of will  it took another two years for me to see a psychiatrist who actually knew what the fuck they were doing she immediately diagnosed me with adhd and later a counselor came to the same conclusion just from me talking about my anxiety it still took a year after that for my mom to decide that maybe i wasnt taking adhd meds for a study boost  it took a lot of time and a couple of shouting matches but my mom and i have eventually come to terms with the issues we had throughout my childhood