this girl i was dating about 8 years ago had a friend shed known since high school that did not care for me at all  shed constantly throw backhanded comments at me after just about every time we hung out with the friend my girlfriend would say thank you for not going down to her level and reacting to what shes saying   yeah i completely missed whatever shade this chick was throwing my way the first few times it happened it was all of this three layers deep nonsense that was an insult if you tilted your head 15 degrees to the right and squinted somebody that didnt know her would miss it so she could feel superior because she was mean to you and you didnt catch it  i eventually cracked the code but still didnt react then my girlfriend got tired of this girl being shitty to me and we stopped hanging out with her girlfriend stuck around i put a ring on it and she upgraded into wife   the point is that you can win by not reacting