i tried iv ketamine for my ocd and it has improved my reaction to having compulsions and has eliminated my passion to kill myself i had a plan before my first infusion after the 40 minute first infusion i had no suicide plan anymore ill need maintenance treatment but whatever man as long as i get to stay alive and create art and not lose my life to such a nefarious and insidious mental disease   i know for a fact that had i killed myself i would have wanted people to know just one thing if anything ocd would have killed me the way cancer can kill someone even when they are fighting it and getting what is supposed to be successful treatment i wanted to die because of my ocd point blank without the disorders interference into my life i dont feel suicidal