monks of shaolin kung fu masters would train their hands against wood bruce lee just as his mastermentor ip man did used a wooden wall as a punching bag   wont that break your hands yes well then wtf why   when you work out at the gym you can and will tear your muscles not a matter of if but how much tearing occurs anyone reading this whos tried to get ripped knows that its a literal goal lifting the proper amount of weight for you correct amount of reps and sets its a fine line between micro-tearing your muscles so that your body regenerates the muscle fibers broken and dressing your body to the point muscles are strained macro-torn at best youll have a sprain at worst your muscles will have overworked to the point where they begin releasing shit it shouldnt into the body like myoglobin    generating new fibers in the space made from torn fibers vs poisoning yourself is different  i learned this lesson the hard way with a new years resolution plus ocd plus a very triggering new years eve day 3 of the new year i focus on weight lifting and i use it as a means to get the rage about the current situation and anguish of what happened out im not against talking about it but it requires context upon context to be told longer story short is going to still be long longer than this monolith of a post that serves as a hyperbolic superfluously detailed metaphor and then a message fitness expert friend was their working out with me he spotting me and giving motivation so i can give 100 well thats a very good mantra to generally follow literally doing so isnt such a bright idea  i work my back and chest primarily some abs some legs in between rests it ends and while i feel definitely sore its no more so than what ive experienced as few times before later that night i feel sore as shit but a hot bath soothes it like anything else honestly nice in its something distracting day 2 and im thinking i did a more than moderate but healthy routine   the grey area between moderation and obsession disciplined devotion  i swung too far one way i dont know it yet  im compelled to go back to the gym sure you guys know what that feels like but self assess my body and am like nah gotta wait for more repair i could barely lift anything heavy at home day 3 the brown color urine i noticed yesterday typical of dehydration i was hydrating so thought i was fine turned red like rosé wine later it comes out like the color of coca-cola and i pee in a cup to show my family im not too worried and am like what do you think we go to the drs  does a urine test and runs it for what he thought might be an infection his best guess  they run tests reports a small amount of blood in the urine but cant find anything substantial run it further for other shit mother is not pleased with this answer as i start making lots more coca cola in the toilet maternal instincts kick in   we go to the er they are confused few hours later and the second dr starts figuring it out went to the er at 12 am it later is 4 and im thinking oh boy cant wait to go home about that time the other dr says i may have to spend a night there that was a lie   at 8pm im getting put in my own room with my iv bag of saline its rhabdomyolysis rhabdo for short rare generally but relatively not they get people who are really into high intensity workouts like crossfit a few times a month if anyone watched house md great show the reason he has his pain problem is because of a case of rhabdo that flew under the radar for far too long it doesnt hurt i can tell you that so its easy it is essentially muscle death i was fine because we caught it early thanks to the myoglobin in my muscles filling my bloodstream traveling to my kidneys and blocking the ventricles of the kidney piss was brown cause my kidney was shutting down the muscles that died were in a state too late to regenerate for dr house why they had to remove a hunk of muscle from his leg i aint a dr like him so if anyone reading this is a med student forgive my tardation  9pm and i realize im not going home and am pissed turned out it took 4 nights of constant iv fluids hydrating me on a scale that one could not possibly achieve by drinking i remember writing down xhr= 500ml each hour they were impressed by my good bookkeeping on the walls whiteboard i pissed into a measuring bottle  i had to shovel snow because if i dont someone stubborn with a bad back was going to do it anyway so i pissed it to cups a lot first night their begins with im avoiding the work milf nurse who was quite attractive and had a tray of pharmaceuticals the good stuff so i was alright y22g258 to my nibas is the know  tldr point is punching a wall will micro fracture the bones in your hands bruce lee among many martial artists before and after would do so to strengthen them but like working out a muscle you have to pace it correctly natural change over time from discipline will give you iron fists not the marvel series that bit off more than it could chew and spewed over the others if you want iron fists in any fight you cant give in to the all or nothing attitude ocd often bestows or at least in my experience one man punching a wall is meditation and strengthening while another man punching a wall is self-harming depends on the person and what they are fighting ive been cognizant of what ocd is before i learned the initials some would call it an acronym but we call those people stupid you dont spell those out like initials an example of an acronym is something you say as a word like nato unlike the un or us   tangental my point is that ive acquired pretty irony fists i would like to help anyone feeling less armored i have about 85 of the level of the ocd that ive had since 4 years old or earlier i cant remember i for a long time thought everyone with it had it right from the get go i now know that some people develop it later whether it be always growing and only noticed when large enough or hidden inside waiting to manifest with the right environmental trigger  i recall with good memory my vivd imagination of germs then the multicolored array moving in waves on the sidewalk an invisible layer of microcosm on top of microcosm germaphobia was my first major theme ive cycled through many and have not only a deep empathetic grasp of this disorder but i like to think at least an intellectual