the worse part about ocd is knowing the ad is a virus as someone commented previously but that you click on it anyway because the reward seems so promising  but really the worst part of being ocd especially as a checker is that i know most times that i did the right thing counted the money correctly and locked it in the safeyes i locked all the doorsbut i simply cannot handle the idea that maybe i didntcannot deal with the failure if i was unmedicated i would have returned to work already and re-checked things as my usual routine was interrupted trying to ask myself  what is the worst thing that can happen get fired is it likely to happen no   what amazes me is that most seem to picture the contamination type of ocd and while i certainly dont want a disease and i wash my hands more than most i dont spend hours at the sink also some assume i must line things up and my house must be perfectly organized i am ashamed to admit my house isnt weirdly part of the reason why i dont want guests yes my sentence is incompletei desired the pause   i am a clutterbug and have a difficult time throwing away things such as mail my childrens old homework assignments books and clothing my general thoughts i may throw away something important that i missedi may need this object again in the future i have a pile of mail that needs to be thrown out and believe-you-me i prune at the mailbox i have forced myself to do that why do i take so long to throw away other things that have cluttered my apartment because there is a picker that comes through my complex and rips open garbage bags for aluminum cans i realize i dont have much of an identity but it is mine and i dont want it stolen  dont even get me started on the internet i try not to say something that i would hesitate to say to anotherbut reallyam i i am here am i not its my only social media now but i bet if anyone were to lay it out before melets just not go there just dont   my husband has never been one for christmas gifts and thats okay but i did find myself feeling hurt because the beautiful gift wrapped beneath the tree this last holiday was a paper shredder i perceived it as a personal attack could i use one yes but he could have purchased and presented it out of any of the other 364 days in a year its a high tech broom and dustpan in my book   no i do not save old bits of tape or wrapping paper yes i throw out questionable foods there are no dead animals or feces i promise you i hate to be so crass but that is what people assume of hoarders which i have described myself anyway as clutterbugpackrat   if no one reads this that is fine i feel good for having said it   i would also add that i am obsessing over a recent quiz score yes i did well and received an a but although i knew the answer to one of the questions  the wording was too ambiguous which probably made me pick the wrong answer--i do not know we have the right to rate the module taught i wonder if i should mention it dont want to be that crazy person though it is not uncommon for me to pick the wrong answer not because i didnt know what the answer was but because the wording was tricky and i over thought it   wonder how many times i will read my response here to look for typos and to clarify my statement