i have the urge to draw sometimes but then after i get material out i cant think of what i want to draw i can look at images and not come to what i want sometimes its youtube and i cant figure what i want to watch right now im in a learning frenzy reading on sales buisness and freelancing and learning russian i am reading some and understanding most of the material ive never been bad at comprehension but i do better actually physically doing the stuff myself sometimes ive been needing to re-read or relisten  for perfection or because i started thinking about other things and i didnt actually comprehend what i just read only reason im reading on that stuff now is for an opportunity i may have coming up that would take my life in a whole nother direction compared to where i would be if i stuck with what i am doing currently and i want the latter