i don’t want to be the downer in this wonderfully positive community but i really don’t get this line of thinking   when therapists partners or others tell me that i respond “yeah i know i’m great and all but if _____ issue makes me a bad spouse behind on my bills unproductive or generally not meeting reasonable expectations that’s what i feel bad about and there’s no getting around those facts”   like the guilt and feelings of insecurity we share come from real world results not just imagined inadequacies so what if it’s “not my fault” life doesn’t care whose fault it is we still have jobs to do and kids to take care of  so am i missing something i beat myself up all the time and i have better days and worse days but it doesn’t change the reality or situations i fucked up that couldshould have been handled better with more concentration more compensation more medication more responsible management of the lemons life gave me