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" In a fit of wild metaphoric gesticulating, repressed Russian hipster honcho Vladimir Putin wants us all to &amp;quot;quick, look over here!&amp;quot; and be really excited that he&amp;#039;s finally releasing the two jailed members of feminist punk band Pussy Riot, who have spent almost two years behind bars on charges of &amp;quot;hooliganism&amp;quot; for daring to speak out against Putin&amp;#039;s government and the church. Naturally Russia&amp;#039;s reigning alpha male still doesn&amp;#039;t approve of their actions, stating, &amp;quot;I feel sorry for Pussy Riot not for the fact that they were jailed, but for disgraceful behavior that has degraded the image of women.&amp;quot; He likes his ladies quietly subservient, of course, which explains why he gets so excited on the extremely rare occassion he sees boobs. But what he&amp;#039;s really hoping is that everyone is so busy patting him on the back for freeing these &amp;quot;despicable&amp;quot; ladies and the 30 Greenpeace activists that are also to be released a solid that the world stops noticing for a few minutes that Russia is basically Hell on Earth as far as human rights go. It&amp;#039;s a tough job he has, this whole &amp;quot;being a country&amp;#039;s absolute leader&amp;quot; thing. You have to wonder if it was worth all that effort to fix the election. I mean, the guy just wants to host the damn Winter Olympics in peace, can&amp;#039;t people stop nailing their balls to the ground in front of his house already? It&amp;#039;s bad enough that the giant democratic thorn in his side is sending a bunch of gay people to defile the citizens of Sochi, though Putin seems to be so intent on locking away any local rabble rousers who may fall under their sway that they&amp;#039;re likely to just walk right into a state-sterilized bubble of shiny happy propaganda anyway, but he&amp;#039;s also been busy buying the Ukraine and would really just like to kick back, decompress, maybe take off his shirt, or even guide some young birds to their migration route again.  Something for Putin to ponder when he&amp;#039;s on his next deep-sea exploration mission or single handedly taking to the air to fight wildfires: Faux-heroics and snapping duck-face selfies with kids may be all well and good, but people have a limit to how far they&amp;#039;ll be pushed and repressed before pushing back. Proclaiming &amp;quot;look how free we are!&amp;quot; to the world while making it essentially illegal to be gay or cast so much as a sidelong glance at his dictatorial rule may not have the end-result he&amp;#039;s looking for. As one recently lost visionary famously said, &amp;quot;In my country we go to prison first, and then become president.&amp;quot; "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/news/a26501/putin-wants-you-to-look-this-way-quick/>