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"Taylor Swift doesn't sweat.I discovered this little bit of science when I worked out last week. She is a wizard, an alien, or is missing the gene that causes us to perspire. That's the only explanation.After seeing all the photos of the singer looking impeccable entering and exiting the gym recently \u2014her preferred ensemble: a girly dress, heels red lips, and her hair blown out in the Taylor Swiftiest of ways\u2014 I felt inspired to exercise, Taylor Swift style.\n\tAdvertisement - Continue Reading Below\n\t\n\nI began my morning with a shower \u2014something I would never usually do before visiting the gym. I blow-dried my hair, straightened it, and carefully applied makeup. I arrived 15 minutes late to my workout because I took extra time working on the cowlick at the back of my head. But I knew, like Taylor, I would be photographed, and thus, it would be time well spent. I don't put that much effort into getting ready for work.\n\nEntering the gym in heels and red lipstick at 10 a.m., I felt like an asshole. Maybe if I was coming from work I wouldn't have minded, but knowing full well I'd dressed up to go work out, I felt incredibly self conscious as I made my way to the locker room. I quickly changed into my athletic gear and wiped off the lipstick as best I could. Then I faced my first real problem: How do I keep my silk dress wrinkle-free? Perhaps Tay has her own locker that's tall enough to hang an outfit, or her bag-toting bodyguard holds his arm out like a human coat hanger, but with neither of those perks at my disposal, I employed my best artful draping technique as I stuffed it into a little cubby.Then, I worked out. In a particularly endorphin-y moment, I downloaded Taylor Swift's latest album, Red \u2014I was feeling good, glow-y, 22, etc. Then, two songs in, I started to sweat. A few minutes later I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and cringed \u2014I resembled the angry, tomato-face emoji I'm normally so fond of. What would Taylor do? I thought to myself, and mid-\"I Knew You Were Trouble,\" I cut my workout short at 45 minutes and headed to the locker room.Before embarking on this journey, I'd anticipated a few sticky (literally) hurdles, one being how to salvage my now-sweaty blowout. Before Swiftifying myself, I'd reached out to Alli Webb, the founder of Drybar to get her expert opinion: \"It\u2019s a healthy challenge to preserve your blowout through a workout class, but it can be done if you\u2019re okay with coming out with a little Mai Tai\u2013aka a beachy hair look,\" she wrote via email. \"Simply use a little dry shampoo at your roots by sectioning your hair, lifting, and spraying about four to five inches from your scalp. You can also re-blow out the front (bangs/fringe) which is a great way to get another day or two out of your blowout.\"\n\tAdvertisement - Continue Reading Below\n\t\n\nBut one thing I didn't expect to contend with was the sweat ... all the sweat. I'm not even a sweaty person, but there was no way I was going to merely towel off and put my dress back on\u2014 and I bet Taylor doesn't either. So I made my way to the showers, and in doing so, I did something Taylor Swift definitely doesn't do: I walked on the bathroom floor of a gym in bare feet. Gag.Making the water as cold as I could stand, I carefully rinsed off, focusing on my upper neck and the top of my forehead, doing my best to shield my hair. All in all, it was a pretty high-stress shower experience. Deciding that it was as good as it was going to get, I returned to the locker room to begin the challenge of reassembling myself.First, I blow-dried my hair for the second time that day, then spritzed some dry shampoo up in there for good measure. As I was applying my makeup again, brushing on powder galore in an attempt to mask my skin's beet-red hue, I noticed that I was emitting heat. My under-eye concealer basically melted into my face\u2014in more of a gross gelatinous way rather than a Gisele, glowing way \u2014and my hair was starting to pouf. I was a sauna and it wasn't pretty. This became even more evident when I attempted to slip back into my dress: There was no slipping, just sticking. It was in this moment that I realized Taylor Swift can't actually sweat ... or the Us Weekly reports are true and she spends an hour getting ready post-workout\u2014 45 minutes of which must consist of her just sitting, de-furnacing.\n\nRedressed and feeling a tad rumpled, I met my body guard at the door, handed him my \"gym bag,\" and got ready to face the paparazzi (cough, ELLE.com photographer, Katie Friedman, cough). I exited with confidence and returned to my waiting SUV.I learned a lot while going to the gym like Taylor Swift, but the biggest takeaway was that I didn't like it. Though it may be glorious to have someone carry around your sweaty clothes, have a car waiting to pick your unsweaty butt up, and you know, look perfect all the time, that last part is hard, and way too stressful. (I'm also convinced that showering at the gym without properly washing my face and then immediately applying makeup is what caused my current breakout. Damn you, Taylor Swift.) Another thing the experience taught me to appreciate \u2014besides my own anonymity \u2014is how amazingly photogenic the singer is. If you look at photos of her, Swift nails the paparazzi shot almost every time, doing the perfect, nonchalant \"Oh, are you taking my picture?\" look, nary a closed eye or double chin in sight:\n\tAdvertisement - Continue Reading Below\n\t\n\nI, on the other hand, did not nail it every time:So I will go back to ducking in and out of my workout classes in my gross college T-shirts and old sneakers, take the subway home, and shower at my leisure. And I will not look perfect doing any of it.\n\nYou win this time, Taylor Swift.Photo credit: Getty/Katie Friedman"^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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