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"After being asked for a &amp;quot;new do&amp;quot; for a couple months, I decided to surprise Rex with a little change in the Southern region. It was time to spice stuff up. Despite pushing out two babies in two years (or perhaps because of it) I was not about to endure the agony of a wax job. Besides, Rex is always going on and on about the budget. I&amp;#039;ve given up fancy hair salons - I take care of my own nails. We rarely go out to eat anymore. Why couldn&amp;#039;t I prune the garden myself? So off to the shower I went with my handy razor and shaving cream. Snip snip, pluck pluck... yadda yadda yadda... I did what I thought was a pretty decent job - and I wasn&amp;#039;t burning in pain! I was really onto something. I was so proud of myself - not to mention just a little bit sassy - that I sauntered into the bedroom sans glasses. My hair (on my head, people) was long and wet - combed straight down my back. I was definitely channeling Bo Derek - you know that scene when she frolics in slow motion on the beach? Except I&amp;#039;m not blonde and tan, but a bit more squishy with freckles. And I&amp;#039;m at least ten years older than she was when she made that movie. Note: If you have no idea who Bo Derek is, then you&amp;#039;re obviously younger than I am. Which is fine! I don&amp;#039;t feel inferior. I didn&amp;#039;t that night either. No, My spirit, as opposed to my hoo hoo from an overpriced yank job, was on fuego! Rex looked up at me from his I-pod, staring at me quizzically for a second. &amp;quot;No doubt the shock of seeing his fantasy come true,&amp;quot; I thought to myself. I moved closer to the bed. He stared a bit longer at the main attraction. Just when I thought he&amp;#039;d ravish me, he burst out laughing. &amp;quot;What is so funny?&amp;quot; I inquired. After all, Rex is not a real chuckler to begin with - especially when it means he&amp;#039;s about to get some action. &amp;quot;I love what you&amp;#039;ve done, baby... I do... it&amp;#039;s just... it&amp;#039;s um...&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Oh just SAY IT!&amp;quot; I insisted. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s kind of crooked.&amp;quot; What?! I couldn&amp;#039;t believe it. I stomped back into the bathroom, put on my trusty red glasses, and lo and behold, he was correct! Dictionary - indredulous - my picture smiling back at me! Typical. I finally gave myself a landing strip and Rex&amp;#039;s plane was going to need Dramamine to keep from getting dizzy on the descent. &amp;quot;Come back in here!&amp;quot; he continued laughing. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s no big deal.&amp;quot; I would have argued with him, but certain things don&amp;#039;t lie. His jet was ready for take-off. Other than missing out on some beverage service and a few bags of peanuts, it was a lovely flight - one we&amp;#039;ll be taking again soon. Next time, though... I&amp;#039;ll don my spectacles before transforing the runway. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/relationships/a2992/crash-landing/?src=shelter_footer>