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"Brace your butts, tech nerds: Apple is acquiring Kohler toilets. Or at least that's the joke behind this parody of the tech giant's reported Beats Electronics acquisition. \nApple is close to acquiring Dr. Dre's audio electronics company for $3.2 billion, and the response from the general public has been a collective \"Huh?\" Now, Funny or Die has offered its own take on the potential acquisition by offering a few guesses as to Apple's next big buys.\nSee also: Apple Buying Beats? It Isn't About the Headphones\n\nIf this parody is an indication of the tech company's future head-scratching acquisitions, we could soon be munching on Apple iPizzaRolls before taking a quick bathroom break on Apple toilets. \nBONUS: 14 Tech Supplies That Made School Tolerable in the '90s\n\n\n\n14 Tech Supplies That Made School Tolerable in the '90s\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n1. Floppy discs stored files. Dropbox who?\n\n\nImage: Flickr, Tomas Jezek\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n2. Computer labs were filled with the Apple IIGS.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, SashayShante\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n3. Which was replaced by the original iMac -- with colors!\n\n\nImage: Imgur, SashayShante\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n4. Oregon Trail was cutting edge and featured multiple colors.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, [user deleted]\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n5. Modern advancements were made in pen technology.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, bestpersonever\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n6. A substitute teacher meant rolly-cart TV day.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, flyvaion\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n7. The precursor to the Kindle.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, lemonpartyorganizer\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n8. R.I.P. Microsoft Encarta, murdered by the internet.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, ms_brightside\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n9. It was always fun to watch your teacher fumble with overhead projectors.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, goosepoop\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n10. Way better than MS Paint.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, [user deleted]\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n11. Your school was badass if they had LaserDiscs.\nThe bigger the CD, the better.\n\nImage: Imgur, Jagator\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n12. These brightly colored calculators almost made it seem like you were getting a toy to play with.\n\n\nImage: Imgur, purewhispers\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n13. Until they stopped letting you borrow, and made you buy your own ridiculously expensive one.\nAnd for some reason, they still exist, and they're still expensive.\n\nImage: Imgur, [user deleted]\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nYour teacher was the coolest when she didn't make you sharpen your own pencils.\n\n\nImage: Flickr, Jon Ross\n\n\n\n\n"^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://mashable.com/2014/05/13/apple-acquisitions-parody/>