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" Writes Save the Date reader Violet: My boyfriend and I went engagement ring shopping this weekend {Yay! } but it did not go well. {Boo. } I like a lot of sparkle, but from a bunch of smaller-size diamonds, like the ring Joe DiMaggio gave Marilyn Monroe. My boyfriend, however, likes MAJOR bling. He picked a 2.5 carat solitaire engagement ring&amp;amp;#8212;and a 2 carat wedding band to match it. I FLIPPED when I saw the price tag&amp;amp;#8212;around $14,000! I&amp;#x27;m flattered that my guy wants to buy me a big diamond, but I feel like it&amp;#x27;s TOO big! Is that bad? My mom says he gets the final call, and I should be happy with whatever he buys me, but I just feel uncomfortable with the idea of an iceberg on my finger! Help! Here are my thoughts: Sorry, mom, butI have to disagree with you on this one. No girl should get stuck with a ring she doesn&amp;#x27;t love just to preserve her guy&amp;#x27;s ego. Especially since the ring in question hasn&amp;#x27;t even been purchased yet. If you let your guy buy what makes HIM happy, you&amp;#x27;ll probably end up like a friend of mine, who never told her guy she didn&amp;#x27;t like her engagement ring. They&amp;#x27;ve been happily married for years now, but guess what? The ring never magically become her style. So she stopped wearing it. If you&amp;#x27;re guy wants to spend a bunch on your engagement ring, that&amp;#x27;s fine. But buying a ring YOU don&amp;#x27;t like is a waste of money. You&amp;#x27;re the one who&amp;#x27;s going to be wearing it, hopefully forever, after all. And if you found a 2.5 carat solitaire cumbersome while you were just trying on rings, imagine how annoyed you&amp;#x27;ll be by it when it snags your tights or scratches your baby&amp;#x27;s face. (I haven&amp;#x27;t been wearing my 1.5 carat engagement ring this winter, because it&amp;#x27;s too bulky under gloves!) Some girls don&amp;#x27;t mind a ring that&amp;#x27;s 3, 4, even 10 carats, but this ring is isn&amp;#x27;t for &amp;quot;some girl,&amp;quot; it&amp;#x27;s for you. So you deserve to have a ring that matches your style&amp;amp;#8212;and your lifestyle. The ring Joe DiMaggio gave Marilyn Monroe is pretty bling-tastic, but less in-your-face than a super-size solitaire. This ring is similar, but costs half as much as the one your guy was eyeing: Princess Cut Diamond Eternity Ring from Blue Nile, $7,000. I think before your next ring shopping trip, you need to say, &amp;quot;Look, I know you like big solitaires, but I&amp;#x27;m the person who&amp;#x27;s going to be wearing this ring, and I just don&amp;#x27;t. I&amp;#x27;ll be thrilled when we&amp;#x27;re engaged, and I&amp;#x27;d love to have have a ring I&amp;#x27;m thrilled about, too. I want to wear my engagement ring every day, for the rest of my life, so it would be great to have a something that really felt like &amp;#x27;me.&amp;#x27;&amp;quot; Ladies, what do you think? Does Violet need to take what she gets, like her mom says? Or should she speak up? Have a wedding-y dilemma of your own? E-mail me! Photo 1: Thinkstock. Photo 2: Getty Images. Photo 3: Courtesy of Blue Nile."^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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