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"I said to my daughter, &amp;quot;You know what I just can&amp;#039;t stand about this book? The long passages with no dialogue.&amp;quot; She paused, then said, &amp;quot;Mom, are there any books you like?&amp;quot; Now it was my turn to pause. How could she ask that, when everyone knows how much I love to read? But then again, when had I last complimented a book \u2014 even one I admired? Come to think of it, how often did I say anything without a negative twist? I don&amp;#039;t want my tombstone to read She was pretty nice, except for all the whining. So I&amp;#039;m taking action. I&amp;#039;m going to try to stop complaining for a month. Wait, make that a week. Seven days of &amp;quot;If you can&amp;#039;t say anything nice, don&amp;#039;t say anything at all.&amp;quot; I can stay upbeat for that long...can&amp;#039;t I? Day 1 It&amp;#039;s 11:00 a.m. I sit down at my desk for a quick review of the comments I&amp;#039;ve made this morning. &amp;quot;Why can&amp;#039;t anyone come up with skim milk that tastes good?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;That exfoliant was a total waste of money.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Don&amp;#039;t you hate the music on the Weather Channel?&amp;quot; Three gripes since I woke up, and those are just the ones I can remember. Revised plan: Tomorrow, I&amp;#039;ll stop whining. Today, I&amp;#039;ll just take notes. For example, what&amp;#039;s the point of carrying on about the weather? Sure, it&amp;#039;s just a conversation starter, but everyone already knows what it&amp;#039;s doing outside. Oops. Now I&amp;#039;m complaining about other complainers. Day 2 &amp;quot;I have so much work to do,&amp;quot; moaned one of my friends on the phone this morning. &amp;quot;What about you?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Not too bad, actually,&amp;quot; I answered, and immediately I felt more in control of the projects looming over my head. Wow, my first victory. Can it be that complaining about work makes it seem like even more of a burden than it already is? Flushed with pride, I decided to tell my family about my new resolution at dinner. &amp;quot;For the next week or so, I&amp;#039;m not going to make a single negative comment,&amp;quot; I declared. &amp;quot;That&amp;#039;s so weird, Mom,&amp;quot; said my son. &amp;quot;You don&amp;#039;t sound like yourself.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;I know! That&amp;#039;s the point \u2014 I want to change!&amp;quot; I hope they&amp;#039;ll recognize me when I&amp;#039;ve become Mommy Sunshine. Day 3 I had to get a car-emissions test today, and I didn&amp;#039;t complain to anyone \u2014 just went off and did it. Shouldn&amp;#039;t I get extra credit for that? But when I was watching TV with my daughter, we saw an ad for The Biggest Loser \u2014 and I couldn&amp;#039;t help saying, &amp;quot;I don&amp;#039;t see how anyone can watch this show.&amp;quot; Normally, my kids and I bond over criticizing TV. But now this was just another negative statement, so I added, &amp;quot;On the other hand, I&amp;#039;ve never seen it! Maybe it&amp;#039;s great!&amp;quot; My daughter rolled her eyes. Day 4 Today I caught myself about to say &amp;quot;I hate it when...&amp;quot; and quickly changed it to &amp;quot;Don&amp;#039;t you hate it when...?&amp;quot; But I&amp;#039;m pretty sure that&amp;#039;s cheating. I&amp;#039;ve also found another way to cheat: I&amp;#039;ll say I hate something and then add, &amp;quot;That&amp;#039;s not a complaint. It&amp;#039;s just an observation.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Please stop,&amp;quot; said my son. &amp;quot;I can&amp;#039;t stand you trying so hard not to be negative.&amp;quot; But I can&amp;#039;t stop. If nothing else, this test is making me realize how often I fuss about things that don&amp;#039;t really bother me.  Day 5 Progress! I&amp;#039;ve had a headache for a few hours. (Not a complaint. Just an observation.) So when the supermarket checkout lady asked, &amp;quot;How are you?&amp;quot; I could&amp;#039;ve launched into my sad story \u2014 but instead, I just replied, &amp;quot;Great, thanks. I love your nails. Where&amp;#039;d you get them done?&amp;quot; Biting back the real answer didn&amp;#039;t cure my headache, but it did improve my self-image. Now I can see myself as the type of person who&amp;#039;s friendly to store employees and cheerful in the face of adversity. Day 6 Even when you&amp;#039;ve put a sock in your complaining, it&amp;#039;s not easy to stay positive. Last night, my women&amp;#039;s hockey team lost to a rival that I swear is not as good as we are. Back in the locker room, one of my fellow players said, &amp;quot;That was fun.&amp;quot; I just looked at her. How could I respond without going on about the refs, the other team, the fact that it was almost midnight? But instead of complaining, I expressed what was really on my mind. &amp;quot;I don&amp;#039;t think it&amp;#039;s fun to lose. I feel terrible.&amp;quot; Instant connection. She looked at me sympathetically, rubbed my shoulder, and said, &amp;quot;I know. Me neither.&amp;quot; In terms of emotional relief, saying what I really felt worked better than pointless complaining. Day 7 Just when I&amp;#039;m getting the hang of this, the week is up. My takeaway? The experiment forced me to take an extra moment to consider what I wanted to say; that&amp;#039;s something I plan to keep up. Positive words come to me more naturally now, and I like knowing that I can shift conversation to more tranquil channels. I can&amp;#039;t say I&amp;#039;ve turned into Mommy Sunshine. I haven&amp;#039;t brought about world peace either. But I like knowing that in my own way, I&amp;#039;m nudging things in the right direction. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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