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"A recent study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine suggests that what you always thought was just your queer friends bragging is, in fact, verifiably true: Lesbians are having more orgasms than straight and bisexual women. Men of all orientations, however, are still outpacing all of us. The researchers didn&amp;#039;t investigate factors that might be contributing to sexual satisfaction or a lack thereof, so it&amp;#039;s up to us to find ways to close the orgasm gap \u2014 and then catch up with dudes. One possible explanation for the Lesbian Orgasm Surplus is the disparate definitions of &amp;quot;sex&amp;quot; for straight and gay folks. In standard American sex education, not to mention most of pop culture, sex consists of one thing \u2014 P-in-V intercourse ending in male orgasm. If the woman comes, that&amp;#039;s an awesome bonus, but it&amp;#039;s not really necessary. Lesbians, however, have a wealth of activities under the umbrella of &amp;quot;sex,&amp;quot; and most queer girls I know define sex primarily as &amp;quot;the thing that gets me off.&amp;quot; In other words, lesbians approach sex in much the same way men do: It&amp;#039;s not over until we come. Bisexual women, for whom the available dating pool is more male than female (both because more men than women date women and because of biphobia in the queer community), are more likely to be having sex with dudes and thus experiencing the dude-centric version of sex \u2014 or at least this is my best guess for why their orgasm rates are about the same as those of straight women.  The researchers theorized that &amp;quot;self-identified lesbian women are more comfortable and familiar with the female body and thus, on average, are better able to induce orgasm in their female partners.&amp;quot; I&amp;#039;m skeptical of this \u2014 it has a whiff of the &amp;quot;women&amp;#039;s bodies are just sooooo complicated&amp;quot; excuse that men have been using for generations. It also assumes that female anatomy is exactly the same from one woman to the next, which is simply not true. What makes women come is not very complex, but it does vary from woman to woman. Being a lesbian doesn&amp;#039;t make someone an expert on &amp;quot;the female body&amp;quot; \u2014 there are as many different kinds of female bodies as there are women. But while lesbians might not be experts on every woman&amp;#039;s body, they&amp;#039;re usually very familiar with their own bodies. Coming out as queer was, for me, concurrent with getting a lot more comfortable with my anatomy and what it took to get me there. I was a late bloomer when it came to masturbating, and even when I figured it out, I was hesitant to ask for what I wanted in bed. The first time I slept with a woman, she told me exactly what she needed, down to angle and RPM. It was amazing, and it totally changed my approach to sex. With dudes, my approach was usually to cross my fingers and hope; with women, I shook off my self-consciousness and learned to say, &amp;quot;Faster and a tiny bit to the left.&amp;quot; It&amp;#039;s no accident that men, who masturbate way more than women, are also having more orgasms during partnered sex. If you want to come like a lesbian (or a guy), you have to get to know the female anatomy \u2014 specifically, yours. Being an expert in how to get yourself off will let you give helpful directions to your eager-to-please partner. (If your partner is not eager to please, time to trade up.) Even if your sex partners are primarily or only male, you can still benefit from the experience of your Sapphic compatriots and, as Jessie J would encourage, Do It Like a Dude. Know what makes you come, be confident in communicating your needs to your partner, and don&amp;#039;t let them stop until you get there. If all else fails, hang out at your local lesbian bar until that cutie in the Chuck Taylors agrees to teach you her secrets. Follow Lindsay on Twitter. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a30519/how-to-have-orgasms-like-a-lesbian/>