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" Sometimes a Cosmo sex tip is more of a damn fun time than it is arousing. Like, for instance, sticking loose change on his buttocks and then covering his penis with a doughnut and then collapsing in giggle fits at the insanity of it all. But, other times, a Cosmo sex tip is the MOTHERFLIPPING BOMB. This week&amp;#039;s Vintage Cosmopolitan Sex Tip is one such magical sex tip. Put edible body paint on your breasts and then put your breasts on his body and then lick it off? Uh, yes please. It&amp;#039;s basically the whipped cream bikini scene from Varsity Blues, but you don&amp;#039;t have to try to evenly spray creamy topping on your pubic zone. NOICE! The Sex Tip: &amp;quot;Dip your breasts in edible body paint, and use them to &amp;#039;sponge paint&amp;#039; his entire body. Then lick it off.&amp;quot; The Location: The bedroom, on a bed covered in old beach towels. This is when I realized I have 15 beach towels to every one regular towel I own and WTF is wrong with me; when will I finally be an adult?? The Music: &amp;quot;None of Your Business&amp;quot; by Salt-N-Pepa because we were definitely freakin&amp;#039; on the weekend, and it&amp;#039;s none of your business. Well, except it&amp;#039;s totally your business right now since I&amp;#039;m writing about this on a publicly accessible website. HI MOM. The Mood: Excited! And, not gonna lie, kinda hungry! We skipped dessert so that I would be particularly sugar-crazed.  The Act: Where does one procure edible body paint? Etsy of course! I used &amp;quot;Stroke It \u2014 Chocolate Bacon Natural Vegan sensual warming dark chocolate edible body paint.&amp;quot; I don&amp;#039;t know. It&amp;#039;s the first thing that came up on my Google search and I&amp;#039;m lazy. All in all, the stuff tasted pretty good, and when I did decide to be a little less lazy and look around for other edible body paints after the act, it was kinda nice to find some stuff that wasn&amp;#039;t made of chemical death. I mean, the ingredients on some of these things! Might as well drink some arsenic mixed with sewage water and call it a day! So be sure to do some research if you&amp;#039;re at all health conscious. OK, now that I&amp;#039;ve gotten you nice and excited with talks of poison and garbage, let&amp;#039;s get to the actual act. My boyfriend applied the body paint to my breasts and this, in and of itself, was pretty delicious foreplay. I mean, having warm goo rubbed into your areolas is the tits and I highly recommend it. Then we made out for a while and I basically did The Worm on top of him (sexier than it sounds but also just as funny as it sounds) to disseminate the body paint. Then I licked it off and it was VERY EROTIC. Seriously, I felt like I was in a Jackson Pollock-directed porno. Who doesn&amp;#039;t want to feel like a classy, artistic porn star during sex? No one. My sweet tooth sated, we did it. Twice. The novelty of the body paint didn&amp;#039;t even distract from the hotness of it all. Seriously, BEST. SEX TIP. EVER. I know what you&amp;#039;re thinking: This sounds messy. But it really was a lot more manageable than I was expecting. The paint is sticky enough that it mostly stays on your bodies (although definitely make use of your plethora of beach towels because some WILL get on your sheets), and it washes off quite easily in the shower (Wash each other off post-coitus!). At risk of sounding like your ~*~*~sExY~*~*~ financial advisor, this is a sex tip that just make sense. It involves rubbing your breasts all over his body \u2014 something no heterosexual man will hate \u2014 and unlimited licking. Please tell me what&amp;#039;s unerotic about that. Like, if you can, I am worried about your sex life, and do you need a hug? (Come here, I already have the edible body paint on my bazoombas!) Photo credit: Getty Images "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/news/a6537/edible-body-paint/>