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" I was skeptical about The Secret before I even knew what it was. &amp;quot;You haven&amp;#039;t heard of The Secret?&amp;quot; gasped an obnoxious woman at a party. &amp;quot;Have you been hiding in a cave?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Apparently,&amp;quot; I replied.  &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s a book,&amp;quot; she continued. &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;ve read it three times. And I watched the DVD four times. I go to the Website every day!&amp;quot;  I felt like whispering to her, &amp;quot;Psst! The Secret is that you have too much free time.&amp;quot; Instead, I nodded, half-listening, as she raved about how the book had transformed her life \u2014 and in just two weeks!  My initial instinct was to call The Secret a crock and forget about it. But I was curious. Googling confirmed that my party companion wasn&amp;#039;t the only obsessed fan; millions of copies had sold within months. So I decided to buy the book. I have principles, after all \u2014 I couldn&amp;#039;t trash something I wasn&amp;#039;t fully acquainted with. I&amp;#039;d read it. And then I&amp;#039;d trash it.  The Secret turns out to be mostly a series of quotes from author Rhonda Byrne&amp;#039;s panel of experts, which includes a &amp;quot;personal transformation specialist,&amp;quot; a &amp;quot;trainer in the field of mind potential,&amp;quot; and a &amp;quot;visionary.&amp;quot; I was 10 pages into the book when I decided it had to be a parody. Or a comedy. Except, you know, not funny.  I&amp;#039;ll save you the $23.95 and sum up The Secret in three sentences: Your thoughts are magnetic. Think positive thoughts, and you&amp;#039;ll attract wealth, health, and love. Think negative thoughts, and you&amp;#039;ll attract poverty, illness, and loneliness. (Guess I shouldn&amp;#039;t have grumbled to myself about the book.) As The Secret explains, &amp;quot;You are like a human transmission tower, transmitting a frequency with your thoughts.&amp;quot; What&amp;#039;s more, it continues, the universe follows the Law of Attraction, and &amp;quot;like attracts like, so when you think a thought, you are also attracting like thoughts to you.&amp;quot; Ergo, to be happy, just think happy thoughts. The book&amp;#039;s experts suggest counting your blessings and &amp;quot;wrapping every thought in love&amp;quot; in order to connect with the &amp;quot;strongest positive frequency in the Universe.&amp;quot; If you&amp;#039;re feeling blue, you&amp;#039;re supposed to reverse the negativity with &amp;quot;secret shifters,&amp;quot; such as hold\u00ADing a baby, playing with a pet, listening to a joyful song, or watching a funny movie. The power of love? The benefit of positive thinking? All this hype over a message about as enlightening as a Hallmark greeting card? I was underwhelmed. But I kept going. The book offers readers a plan for &amp;quot;manifesting&amp;quot; \u2014 making dreams a reality. &amp;quot;The first step is to\u2026let the Universe know what you want.... Step two is...[to] claim the things you want by feeling and believing they are [already] yours [i.e., visualize your wish coming true]. When you do that, the law of attraction will powerfully move all circumstances, people, and events for you to receive,&amp;quot; which is the third step. Basically, you just wait for your wishes to be granted. That&amp;#039;s right: like magic.  As much as I thought the universal frequency stuff was complete bunk, I had to admit there have been times in my life when visualization certainly worked for me. Seven years ago, when I was a 35-year-old widow with two small daughters, I&amp;#039;d constantly fantasize about meeting a man who&amp;#039;d make me feel alive and happy. I just knew I&amp;#039;d find love again. Within months of reentering the dating world, I met Steve, the wonderful man who&amp;#039;s now my husband. Definitely like magic.  I fiercely reject the book&amp;#039;s claim that bad things happen because people have negative thoughts \u2014 my first husband did not manifest his cancer, and war victims don&amp;#039;t manifest being bombed \u2014 but I was on board with optimism, gratitude, taking action, and believing in one&amp;#039;s dreams. I&amp;#039;d been an accidental &amp;quot;secreter&amp;quot; before, so why not put aside my initial skepticism, experiment for a month, and see whether the book&amp;#039;s methods really worked? My life was pretty good already, but whose life couldn&amp;#039;t use a little fluffing? Next: A Month-Long Experiment Week One  I asked myself the all-important question: What do you really want? Then, as the book instructed, I made a list, writing as if these things had already happened. &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;m so happy and grateful now that:  1. I can run five miles without pain.  2. My 12-year-old daughter, Maggie, and I argue less.  3. When my family visits San Francisco in a month, we&amp;#039;ll get the free hotel room upgrade I applied for. 4. I can have multiple orgasms at will.&amp;quot; That night, I began my visualization practice. It was harder than I thought. I tried picturing an erotic adventure with Steve, but forcing the fantasy took the fun out of it. I attempted to make a mental movie of myself running like the wind without pain. But about three minutes into the imaginary jog, my mind wandered and I started planning a dinner menu. So I shifted to visualizing Maggie and me walking hand in hand, arms swinging, the way we used to before she entered middle school. I felt the joy, but then I got distracted by the sound of the TV switching on. Annoyed, I stomped downstairs and reminded Maggie she had homework. She said, &amp;quot;In an hour.&amp;quot; I said, &amp;quot;Now.&amp;quot; And our usual fight began anew, thereby killing my vision of perfect harmony.  I needed help concentrating, so I called a pro: Mary T. Browne, a psychic and the author of The 5 Rules of Thought. &amp;quot;Right now, you have a chaotic mind \u2014 there are too many thoughts racing around,&amp;quot; she said. &amp;quot;You have to isolate one thought, then magnify it. Start by creating a single snapshot. Picture yourself, for instance, running on a track. Is it sunny or overcast? Are other people around? Add details one by one to make the image clear.&amp;quot; To prevent the mind from wandering, Browne advises, start your daydreaming session by visualizing a candle. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;ll help you relax into a meditative state. If your mind wanders when you&amp;#039;re imagining your wish, bring your focus back by saying the word &amp;#039;candle.&amp;#039;&amp;quot;  Over the next few days, I stared at that mental candle until I saw flickering flames in my sleep. To avoid chaos, I devoted one day to each wish \u2014 on Monday, I&amp;#039;d visualize running; on Tuesday, a whopper orgasm, etc. By Sunday, I&amp;#039;d nearly pulled a calf muscle on the treadmill, Steve and I barely had time for a quickie, let alone a session for the record books, and Maggie and I got into a huge fight about her messy room.  The Secret was a load! The Law of Attraction was a big pile of \u2014 wait! Stop right there. Negativity was my enemy. I searched my apartment for &amp;quot;secret shifters.&amp;quot; I stroked one of my cats, looked at a photo of my younger daughter, Lucy, as a baby, flipped on The Simpsons, and listened to a Grateful Dead CD. I bombarded myself with joy inducers. And got a killer headache. Week Two When I dropped Lucy off at school, another mom told me that she&amp;#039;d been trying interval training (jog for three minutes, sprint for one) to increase her stamina. I wondered, Do I have The Secret to thank for this? Then I read an article about how eating dark chocolate can boost libido. Not wanting to ignore these messages from the cosmos, I started interval training and ate a huge chocolate bar. I failed to detect a seismic shift in my endurance or sexual response. But I was hopeful! My positive brain waves were out there!  Or were they? Can brain waves really attract good things the way a magnet picks up paper clips? &amp;quot;The brain does have a slight amount of electromagnetism,&amp;quot; said Frederick Kahn, M.D., medical director of the Center for Neurofeedback and Integrative Health in Paramus, NJ. &amp;quot;But no one has ever proven that it transmits waves the way The Secret describes. The voltage generated by the brain is really small. It might take the combined voltage of 10,000 brains to run a watch.&amp;quot; Hardly enough juice for one mind to send a thought across the entire universe.  Dr. Kahn also told me that the Law of Attraction \u2014 which Byrne describes as an absolute \u2014 does not exist. &amp;quot;&amp;#039;Like attracts like&amp;#039;? According to the Law of Magnetism, a real law of physics, opposites attract.&amp;quot; Clearly, I would get nowhere fast with The Secret if I listened to a scientist with a medical degree. Or my friends and family. I mentioned my secret life to a select few, and they openly mocked me.  After two weeks, I hadn&amp;#039;t registered an iota of change in my sex life, my running, or my relationship with Maggie. I decided to let those wishes go, temporarily, and focus on just one \u2014 the luxury-suite upgrade. Over and over, I imagined the scene: At the hotel&amp;#039;s reception desk, a chubby blond woman takes my name. Then her face lights up. &amp;quot;Congratulations!&amp;quot; she chirps. &amp;quot;You&amp;#039;ve won an upgrade!&amp;quot; Steve, the girls, and I jump up and down, rejoicing as one. After each daydream, I felt the joy viscerally and wrapped my loving mind around it. Surely my wish was in the bag.  Week Three I moved on to tougher territory: my fights with Maggie. &amp;quot;To make a relationship work, focus on what you appreciate about the other person,&amp;quot; said The Secret. That way, &amp;quot;you&amp;#039;ll get more out of them.&amp;quot; The problem is that I&amp;#039;m already a nonstop praiser, except when Maggie acts up. But in the spirit of The Secret, I cut back on nagging. And guess what happened? Maggie watched more TV and her room went from messy to pigsty. True, we fought less. But all the cats and Simpsons reruns in the world couldn&amp;#039;t trigger happiness when I dared to open her bedroom door.  The book told me, &amp;quot;Be grateful for what you already have, and you will attract more good things.&amp;quot; So every morning, I thought about the ways I&amp;#039;ve been blessed. This simple exercise consistently relaxed me and cut through my maternal annoyance. In this regard, science backs up The Secret. Researchers at the University of Missouri ran a one-month study in which they asked participants to count their blessings and/or visualize their best possible future selves. &amp;quot;The subjects who counted their blessings saw an immediate improvement in their moods,&amp;quot; said Kennon Sheldon, Ph.D., coauthor of the study. &amp;quot;Those who also visualized their best future selves saw an even more significant upswing.&amp;quot;  Even though I was feeling calmer, things with Maggie weren&amp;#039;t any better. So I comforted myself by imagining the hotel upgrade. My San Francisco fantasies had gotten more elaborate: I still checked in with the imaginary clerk, but I spent most of the time daydreaming about my family on the streets of the city, laughing and exploring.  Week Four Twenty-one days and 13 hours into my experiment, jogging still wasn&amp;#039;t any easier. Visualization hadn&amp;#039;t helped, so I tried another technique: laughter. As The Secret tells me, it &amp;quot;releases negativity, and leads to miraculous cures.&amp;quot; So as I ran, I giggled whenever I felt a twinge. During moments of frank pain, I guffawed (appearing, I&amp;#039;m sure, more deranged than enlightened). My pain didn&amp;#039;t go away, but the laughter was a distraction, and I ran farther than usual. I guess that counted for something.  The next day, we flew to San Francisco. When we arrived at the hotel, I practically ran to the registration desk. I looked for the plump blond from my visualization, but saw only skinny men behind the counter. One took my name and said our room was ready. &amp;quot;Did I get the upgrade?&amp;quot; I practically shouted.  &amp;quot;So sorry,&amp;quot; he said. &amp;quot;None were given this week.&amp;quot; I was dumbfounded with disappointment.  We went upstairs to our single room with two king-size beds. &amp;quot;Cool room!&amp;quot; said Maggie, flouncing on a cushy chair. Lucy threw open a window. We had an amazing view of the bay and Alcatraz Island. Still, I sulked. &amp;quot;Come on,&amp;quot; Steve said. &amp;quot;We came for the city, not the room. Let&amp;#039;s get out there and have fun!&amp;quot;  Over the next five days, we did every\u00ADthing, ate everything, never bickered, made memories. I couldn&amp;#039;t have wished for a better family trip.  Then again, maybe I had wished for it. The bulk of my visualizations had been about a feeling of togetherness. Steve and I didn&amp;#039;t get a romantic night in California, but, in a way, the intense family bonding made me feel closer to him, too. The night we got home...let&amp;#039;s just say that the sex was indeed record-book\u2013worthy.  And the next day, Maggie finally cleaned her room. I asked why. She said, &amp;quot;It was disgusting! How did I let it go like that? You should have yelled at me.&amp;quot;  So let&amp;#039;s recap: My family vacation was a blast, without the upgrade. I had my multiple orgasm. My jogs are improving slightly. And Maggie and I are doing well (this week). Do I owe The Secret a whit of thanks?  Maybe a little. Counting my blessings has been uplifting, reminding me of what&amp;#039;s already great about my life. Visualization has forced me to pay attention to what I really desire. And laughing is never a bad idea.  If you ignore The Secret&amp;#039;s far-too-simplistic maxims (no, you will not be doomed to a miserable life for thinking negative thoughts) and the hocus-pocus (the cosmos isn&amp;#039;t going to deliver a new car; it&amp;#039;s busy), there&amp;#039;s actually some helpful advice in the book. But it&amp;#039;s nothing you don&amp;#039;t already know. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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