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"  Writer Amanda McCracken has a piece in The New York Times Opinionator section about being a 35-year-old virgin. She talks of doing &amp;quot;everything but&amp;quot; and waiting for that one magical unicorn of a man to finally bestow upon him That Which Is Most Sacred. That&amp;#039;s all fine and dandy, but then McCracken does some major projecting:  Some feminists might fault me for not having exercised my right to sexuality. However, I was willing to give up a certain sense of pleasure to avoid feelings I feared: betrayal, emptiness, the loss of dignity and control.  I&amp;#039;m here to tell you, no feminist gives a shit what you do with your sexuality (but, uh, they do want you to be happy with whatever you do). Also, as a person who has been both a virgin and a non-virgin, this whole avoiding feelings just because you haven&amp;#039;t had sex thing is bullshit. You can feel all those things \u2014 and feel them powerfully \u2014 with a person you haven&amp;#039;t had sex with. Yes, the length of a relationship and sex can intensify those feelings, but to say you are eschewing them completely by abstaining from sex is naive. Women receive a lot of screwed up messages about sex in our culture \u2014 have sex and you&amp;#039;re a slut; don&amp;#039;t have sex and you&amp;#039;re a prude \u2014 but ultimately, it&amp;#039;s about what you want. Nobody should ever, ever pressure you into having sex before you&amp;#039;re ready, but holding onto your virginity like it&amp;#039;s some magical talisman that wards away evil and keeps you pure and safe is not only a lapse in logic, but brings up the important question of why virginity is such a valuable commodity. How many buckets of salt will it fetch you?  Having sex for the first time (when both parties are of age and consenting) can be a magical thing. Or it can be just mediocre. Or, I&amp;#039;m gonna be honest, it can straight suck. (That&amp;#039;s unsurprising, though; how great were you at riding your bike the first time?) However, it&amp;#039;s just that, one sexual experience in what will hopefully be a long line of awesome sexual experiences. Guarding the door to your virginity with a knife and nun-chucks is your prerogative, but it&amp;#039;s far from an imperative.  Photo via Getty Follow Laura on Twitter.  "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a16527/saving-your-virginity/>