13. One or more machine-readable media comprising instructions for execution by a device embedded in an apparatus to report a state of the apparatus to a remote computer, the instructions for causing the device to: detect the state of the apparatus; generate a message that reports the state of the apparatus to the remote computer, the message comprising a HyperText Transfer Protocol (HTTP) command, the message using eXtensible Markup Language (XML) to report the state, the message containing a code that is unique to the device or apparatus, wherein generating is performed periodically or in response to a deviation in the state; and send the message comprising the HTTP command to the remote computer, the HTTP command comprising a command that is configured to report the state of the apparatus using XML; wherein the device is on an internal network and the remote computer is on an external network that is separate from the internal network, and wherein, as a result, the remote computer cannot communicate to the device to obtain the state of the apparatus; and wherein the state of the apparatus comprises values of two or more variables associated with the apparatus, one or more of the variables being flagged if one or more of the variables corresponds to an error condition associated with the apparatus.
13. One or more machine-readable media comprising instructions for execution by a device embedded in an apparatus to report a state of the apparatus to a remote computer, the instructions for causing the device to: detect the state of the apparatus; generate a message that reports the state of the apparatus to the remote computer, the message comprising a HyperText Transfer Protocol (HTTP) command, the message using eXtensible Markup Language (XML) to report the state, the message containing a code that is unique to the device or apparatus, wherein generating is performed periodically or in response to a deviation in the state; and send the message comprising the HTTP command to the remote computer, the HTTP command comprising a command that is configured to report the state of the apparatus using XML; wherein the device is on an internal network and the remote computer is on an external network that is separate from the internal network, and wherein, as a result, the remote computer cannot communicate to the device to obtain the state of the apparatus; and wherein the state of the apparatus comprises values of two or more variables associated with the apparatus, one or more of the variables being flagged if one or more of the variables corresponds to an error condition associated with the apparatus. 16. The one or more Non-transitory machine-readable media of claim 13 , further comprising instructions that cause the device to: determine the deviation in the state.