

What's confusing me in the below exchange is:

  * What he means by 苦労が絶えない in this context
  * The usage of 言われ方. I often see 言い方 but I don't think I've seen 言われ方 before. 

For context, the 妹 is worried about her friends who did badly in the exams
before the summer holidays (and instead of studying to improve, they instead
focus on having fun).

> 「わたしはあの二人が心配で心配で……」
>
> 「まぁ、遊びたい盛りだというのはわかるが」
>
> 「お兄ちゃん、芹夏ちゃんにまで甘くなっちゃうの？」
>
> 「いや、余所様の家の教育にまで口を出しちゃいけないんじゃなかろうか」
>
> 「そうかもしれないけど……芹夏ちゃんのご両親、すごーく放任だし……」
>
> **「……苦労が絶えないな」**
>
> **「なんかその言われ方ヤダ」**


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question
meaning
Understanding this exchange 「……苦労が絶えないな」「なんかその言われ方ヤダ」


So, it's not very clear to me, but I think the ……苦労が絶えないな is basically
conveying that he's being put in a difficult position, and that he's
frustrated by that.

From what you said and the passage, I understand that the parents are (too)
laissez-faire in their parenting approach, so they won't force their children
to study; and the sister, and I guess the brother by proxy, remain worried
about the friends' lack of studying, so they feel like they should say
something about it. But, he doesn't want to tell them to study as he
understands the friends' desire to have fun. So either they say something and
are the partypoopers, or they say nothing and the friends potentially fail
their exams. They are damned if they do and damned if they don't.

So, I think 苦労が絶えないな in this case is kind of like saying "ugh, the problems
never end" or "it's just one thing after another", perhaps when you are
exasperated, and have some complex/awkward/tricky problem that is left to you
to sort out, and you are trying to work through it, but every way you turn it
seems like there's no easy solution.

I believe that 言われ方 is just using the passive form, so その言われ方ヤダ means
(rendered awkwardly but structurally in English) "that way of being spoken to
is unpleasant". Perhaps very loosely, depending on context it could be more
naturally translated as "don't speak to (me/them) in that unpleasant way",
though this is possibly a bit too direct/cutting.

Does that make sense within the context of what happens next? Hope so, and
hope that helps in any case!


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answer


I don't have much context so I have to be liberally speculate, but here is my
guess.

The brother says to the sister (the person worrying) 苦労が絶えないな meaning that
problems keep coming up for the sister. This is a standard phrase to use for
this meaning.

The sister responds saying なんかその言われ方ヤダ. "なんかヤダ" is a set phrase you can use to
express mild annoyance at things, and it's pretty much exclusively used for
humour. なんか signifies you are not saying the thing you are referring is
unreasonable or wrong, it's just that there is something unpleasant about it
but you can't put your finger on it.

言われ方 means "the way something is spoken about", in this case how the brother
speaks about his sister.

Now onto why the sister says that: 苦労が絶えない is usually used for older people
who have more problems (children, money, health that sort of things). So if
you say 苦労が絶えないな to a young person it makes them feel old.

I'm guessing this is what the sister is going for (it's a self-deprecating
humour).


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