How does the second part in the sentence connect with third part?


> ただ、直さないのか直せないのか、悲しさが悔しさになって、
> **意地と好意を微妙な塩梅でオーバーラップさせてやり返す根性の曲がり具合と意地の強さが本当にダメ人間。**

Source: <https://komachi.yomiuri.co.jp/t/2019/0627/904351.htm?g=04>

If I divide the sentence into parts,

> ただ、直さないのか直せないのか、悲しさが悔しさになって

It's just that, the question/problem of whether it cannot be fixed or I cannot
fix it, has turned my sadness into frustration

> 意地と好意を微妙な塩梅でオーバーラップさせてやり返す根性の曲がり具合と意地の強さが

This problem has made my pride/obstinacy/stubbornness and my
kindness/friendliness turn into this weird combination where there is an
overlap between the will to do it all over again i.e., fix this and my strong
obstinacy/stubbornness.

> 本当にダメ人間。

I am a good for nothing human.

I don't know if my translation for the second part is correct but the way the
second part connects with the third is something that I have trouble
understanding. Why does 強さが abruptly end with ダメ人間. I thought the second part
was an attributive clause but the が ending makes me think otherwise.

Thank you :)




> 直さないのか直せないのか、  
>  (I don't know) whether I won't fix it (=my bad habit described as follows)
> or I cannot fix it, (but) ...

This part is a comment that can be understood independently.

> ～が本当にダメ人間。  
>  I am a terribly useless person because of ～.  
>  ～ indicates I am a really hopeless person.  
>  ～ is why I call myself a useless person.

This part is a little tricky and I don't know which is the best way to explain
it logically, but she is essentially describing the reason why she thinks she
is a ダメ人間.

Everything else (the content of `～`) is the reason part. The main reason is
this noun phrase:

> 根性の曲がり具合と意地の強さ  
>  my distorted and stubborn character

Which is modified by the following long relative clause (as a [gap-less
relative clause](https://japanese.stackexchange.com/a/14550/5010) similar to
勝つ意志 or よく笑う性格):

> 悲しさが悔しさになって、意地と好意を微妙な塩梅でオーバーラップさせてやり返す  
>  my sadness/shock (of being dumped by a man) becomes a revengeful feeling,
> and I (always try to) strike him back with a fine balance of obstinacy and
> affection

This is a rather unique and perplexing expression, and it's hard to grasp the
intended meaning without fully understanding the context. Basically this
clause is a rephrasing of what's mentioned in the first half of her post,
振られた男性を惚れさせて振り返す. Whenever she was dumped by someone, she has always made him
love her again and then dumped him back, just in order to satisfy her vanity.




> 直さないのか直せないのか、  
>  (I don't know) whether I won't fix it (=my bad habit described as follows)
> or I cannot fix it, (but) ...

This part is a comment that can be understood independently.

> ～が本当にダメ人間。  
>  I am a terribly useless person because of ～.  
>  ～ indicates I am a really hopeless person.  
>  ～ is why I call myself a useless person.

This part is a little tricky and I don't know which is the best way to explain
it logically, but she is essentially describing the reason why she thinks she
is a ダメ人間.

Everything else (the content of `～`) is the reason part. The main reason is
this noun phrase:

> 根性の曲がり具合と意地の強さ  
>  my distorted and stubborn character

Which is modified by the following long relative clause (as a [gap-less
relative clause](https://japanese.stackexchange.com/a/14550/5010) similar to
勝つ意志 or よく笑う性格):

> 悲しさが悔しさになって、意地と好意を微妙な塩梅でオーバーラップさせてやり返す  
>  my sadness/shock (of being dumped by a man) becomes a revengeful feeling,
> and I (always try to) strike him back with a fine balance of obstinacy and
> affection

This is a rather unique and perplexing expression, and it's hard to grasp the
intended meaning without fully understanding the context. Basically this
clause is a rephrasing of what's mentioned in the first half of her post,
振られた男性を惚れさせて振り返す. Whenever she was dumped by someone, she has always made him
love her again and then dumped him back, just in order to satisfy her vanity.

