Family questions


When I speak with my mother I must say "haha", when I talk about other
people's mother, I must say "okaasan", but what about when I talk about my
mother to other people?

There is nothing about that in my Japanese book.




Please review the basic roles of honorific and humble expressions. "Haha" is a
humble word, which means you are _lowering_ the mother. "Okāsan" is a mildly
honorific word, which means you are mildly _heightening_ the mother. With
these in mind...

  * When you speak with your own mother, **don't** use "haha" because there is no reason to lower your mother. You can use "okāsan", but there are some other casual options such as "mama", "kāchan", "okan", etc.
  * When you speak with or talk about other people's mother, you have to pay respect to her, so you should use an honorific expression. You should at least use "okāsan", but you may have to use more polite and honorific words such as "okāsama".
  * When you talk about your own mother to other people in formal situations, you need to use **"haha"** to refer to your mother. That's exactly where humble expressions come into play, after all. But when you're casually talking with your friends, you can use "okasān" or anything you normally use.




Please review the basic roles of honorific and humble expressions. "Haha" is a
humble word, which means you are _lowering_ the mother. "Okāsan" is a mildly
honorific word, which means you are mildly _heightening_ the mother. With
these in mind...

  * When you speak with your own mother, **don't** use "haha" because there is no reason to lower your mother. You can use "okāsan", but there are some other casual options such as "mama", "kāchan", "okan", etc.
  * When you speak with or talk about other people's mother, you have to pay respect to her, so you should use an honorific expression. You should at least use "okāsan", but you may have to use more polite and honorific words such as "okāsama".
  * When you talk about your own mother to other people in formal situations, you need to use **"haha"** to refer to your mother. That's exactly where humble expressions come into play, after all. But when you're casually talking with your friends, you can use "okasān" or anything you normally use.

