Nuance of Aに甘えてしまう, to spoil A or to depend on A


I have the following passage:

> S の…息子の時はあの子の自身の意志の固さもありましたが...
>
> 私もまだまだ未熟で……
>
> 正直、あの子 **に甘えてしまって** 今に至ります
>
> その息子からも二人のことはよく考えて欲しいと
>
> その機会を与えるようにお願いすると
>
> 強く…言われまして

Curetnly my translation of it is:

> S…My son, even back then had an iron will…and I was also still too young,
> so...
>
> Honestly, I’ve been relying on that kid, ever since.
>
> Whenever I wanted to have a proper conversation about us whenever asked to
> be given a chance for that...I'd receive a... strong response.

The problem is the に甘えてしまって bit, because apparently Aに甘える can both mean to
spoil A or to depend on A.

Context wise, S, the son of the speaker has always had a firm grasp on how
things should be done and what he wants to do in life. And doing that he
eventually joined the same organisation as his mother (speaker) and has been
one of her most important employees. Therefore I'm assuming she is saying she
has been relying on him, not spoiling or coddling him.

Then again as seen here, his behavior back then could not be said to be nice,
but again it's not so much the behavior of someone spoiled. Like he isn't
shrinking his dutues.

Also the passage is from a talk between two mothers. The other one has a child
nearing the age where she decides what she wants to do in life, while
speaker's child is a grown up so the other one was asking the speaker how was
it when her kid was deciding on his path.

Sooo, what's your thinking on this to me strange duality of に甘える?




あの子に甘えてしまった in a context like this roughly means "I was lazy and ended up
depending on him (=my son)". 甘える does not mean "to spoil". 甘やかす does.

彼女は私に甘えてくる does not necessarily have a negative connotation, and it usually
just means she is "lovey-dovey" and behaves like a cute puppy which likes to
always be with you. It does not mean someone is a dependent or spoiled person
in general.




あの子に甘えてしまった in a context like this roughly means "I was lazy and ended up
depending on him (=my son)". 甘える does not mean "to spoil". 甘やかす does.

彼女は私に甘えてくる does not necessarily have a negative connotation, and it usually
just means she is "lovey-dovey" and behaves like a cute puppy which likes to
always be with you. It does not mean someone is a dependent or spoiled person
in general.

