母になる vs. お母さんになる


There is an example sentence:

> お母さんになって初めて、母・お母さんの辛さが分かる。

I was told that the first お母さん couldn’t be replaced with 母, because it must
refer to someone else's mother (one cannot be one's own mother), but that the
second can be either 母(the speaker's own mother) or お母さん(someone else's
mother).

However, I'm not quite convinced.

I feel that 母 not only can refer to the speaker's own mother, but can also
refer to herself as a mother or maybe mothers in general. Is it possible to
say 母になって初めて?




This depends on the context. If you are saying this to a specific pregnant
person in front of you, it's usually better to say お母さん because it sounds
polite yet friendly.

However, if this sentence is presented without any further context, it looks
like a description of mothers in general, and keigo is not particularly
relevant. You can safely use both 母 or お母さん without being rude to someone.
Simply, 母 sounds more formal or stiff, while お母さん sounds more casual. It's
better to use the same word throughout the sentence to avoid confusion.

  * お母さんになって初めて、お母さんの辛さが分かる。
  * 母になって初めて、母の辛さが分かる。




This depends on the context. If you are saying this to a specific pregnant
person in front of you, it's usually better to say お母さん because it sounds
polite yet friendly.

However, if this sentence is presented without any further context, it looks
like a description of mothers in general, and keigo is not particularly
relevant. You can safely use both 母 or お母さん without being rude to someone.
Simply, 母 sounds more formal or stiff, while お母さん sounds more casual. It's
better to use the same word throughout the sentence to avoid confusion.

  * お母さんになって初めて、お母さんの辛さが分かる。
  * 母になって初めて、母の辛さが分かる。

