これ・それ・あれ when referring to products in a store


I am generally familiar with the usage of こそあど words, however I wanted to
verify which would be best to use in a store when asking you want to purchase
something.

I assume if you are pointing at a menu, you would use "これください", but if you are
pointing to something a few meters away (like something behind the counter)
you would use "それください".

My main question is whether it would be appropriate to use "あれください" in a
restaurant? I know that あれ can have a strong connotation and wanted to see if
it is safe to use, or if I should stick to これ or それ.




Provided that:

  * you are referring to something exists in your range of view, not your memory
  * you are talking to the store's staff, who is not your acquaintance

* * *

You can use...

これ when:

  * the item is in your hand, directly under the tip of your finger, or nearly no distance; or
  * you point at an item that is clearly nearer to you than to the hearer; or
  * you point at the one nearest to you while there are several options in topic

それ when:

  * you point at an item that can be perceived from both you and the hearer, and the distance from you and them are roughly the same or nearer to them; or
  * the item is in the hearer's hand, or they already point at it; or
  * the item is just mentioned by other than you in the range both you and the hearer could perceive

あれ when:

  * you point at an item so far away, or in the direction requires hearer to move their eyes or body to trace what you refer to

If the item meets multiple conditions, I think either of them will work.

