text:  Unfortunately, I'm not a violin smasher. I'm someone who thinks about smashing violins. I've dabbled in smashing things and it always feels utterly stupid and disappointing. I once got dumped the day before Valentine's Day and I slammed the door and it bounced back and hit me in the forehead. Another time after a fight with my mom, I threw a glass to the floor as hard as I could and it bounced.