text:  Terrifying. So then you are caught between two conflicting thoughts. And that is what drove me to the point that I decided not to exist. In fact, Anousheh made several attempts to end his life. He also went on hunger strike. In fact, when they realized that I was not eating was when I was two days a week, we were allowed to have a shower. They could see how thin I had become. So weak and so thin.