I'm trying to plant seeds in the fertile ground or garden of whatever it was that brought you here so that when you leave here something has been touched that will keep those seeds, that actually I'm not planting, they are already in you, keep them being watered nurtured, protected, privileged in a certain way, so that it -- nurtures in some profound sense some aspect of you that wants to be as alive as you can be while you have the chance. 