I said that I think you'll find, Ron that Trudy  if she married would have to give up her  late husband's occupational widow's pension  so that the way you're going on now, where you go and stay with her for two or three days at a time  is far better  oh no, no, no, she'll be able to keep her pension   I said I very much doubt it  then I said  people are so jealous  that if she does marry you  and he doesn't tell the firm  I bet that one of her  dear neighbours will  oh no they're all very nice people round where she lives, I thought there's no good arguing with Ron!