title: Memoirs Of A Gym Rat: One man's 20-year journey through the bowels of the health club industry.
author:  Max Hawthorne 
description: Max Hawthornes raunchy, revealing memoir is certain to induce bouts of calorie-burning laughter, embarrassed grins, and reconsiderations of ones gym membership. A smutty and enjoyable expos of life behind health club doors, Memoirs of a Gym Rat is both a scandalizing and edifying read. After a disillusioning trek toward his dream career in veterinary medicine, Hawthorne determines that he could turn another of his passionsphysical fitnessinto a job. He finagles his way into a starting position at a gym, where he gets his first peek into the often nauseating underbelly of the fitness industry. In the no-holds-barred pages of his memoir, Hawthorne shares many grisly revelations. Trading between sketches of the characters he worked with and for and glaring disclaimers for those who might be inclined to trust that their memberships will be as advertised, Hawthorne takes on the health industry and strips away any illusions of glamour. For the trainer, dreams of transforming lives are quickly shattered by the realities of quotas and cash. But monetary drawbacks are balanced with an overabundance of sex. Pithy introductions of characters add color to Hawthornes overarching presentation of health club life, but few members of the cast stick around for long. Little seems left out; scatological moments, both literal and figurative, abound, among so much politically incorrect behavior that one cant help but groan. Hawthornes honesty on such points will either charm or annoy, or both. For gym members current and prospective, Hawthorne lays bare the truth that gyms care about the heft of a persons wallet, not the reduction of his body mass index. Using his own development from floor assistant to personal trainer to greedy salesperson as a guide, he coaches his readership on how to be wily when considering contracts and training schedules. In the role of coach, Hawthornes professionalism emerges, resulting in advice that may prove invaluable. - ForeWord Clarion Review
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  **Table of Contents**
  
   **Chapter One**
  
   **Chapter Two**
  
   **Chapter Three**
  
   **Chapter Four**
  
   **Chapter Five**
  
   **Chapter Six**
  
   **Chapter Seven**
  
   **Chapter Eight**
  
   **Chapter Nine**
  
   **About the Author**
  
   **More to read?**
  
   **Excerpt: The House Sitter**
  
   **Copyright Information**
  
    
    
    
    
  
  **Chapter One**
  
    
    
  
  I AM IN THE COACH CABIN bathroom of the 747 when a bout of turbulence throws
  me against the door. It stays locked—thankfully. My jeans are bunched around
  my knees and I’ve just shoved my cami up to my neck.
  
  I am—unfortunately—alone. Still, I wonder: How on earth does anyone join the
  mile high club? There’s barely room for me and my imaginary partner, the man
  from seat 3B. My stomach tightens with anticipation and a heavy dose of lust.
  I haven’t felt this in ages, this raw need, and it’s fueling my desire to join
  the mile high club, even if it’s a solo membership.
  
  The blame is squarely on the man in seat 3B. Or at least, that’s 