title: Phillips' Treasury of Humorous Quotations
author:  Bob Phillips 
description: "Speeches are like babies--easy to conceive but hard to deliver."
zlib_text: 
  
  
  
  
  
  ## The Chair of Philanthromathematics
  
  
    
  
  
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  _( The Gentle Grafter - 4 )_
  
  
  
  
  
  ### O. Henry
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  ## O. Henry
  
  
  ## The Gentle Grafter
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  ## The Chair of Philanthromathematics
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  "I see that the cause of Education has received the princely gift of more than
  fifty millions of dollars," said I.
  
  
  I was gleaning the stray items from the evening papers while Jeff Peters
  packed his briar pipe with plug cut.
  
  
  "Which same," said Jeff, "calls for a new deck, and a recitation by the entire
  class in philanthromathematics."
  
  
  "Is that an allusion?" I asked.
  
  
  "It is," said Jeff. "I never told you about the time when me and Andy Tucker
  was philanthropists, did I? It was eight years ago in Arizona. Andy and me was
  out in the Gila mountains with a two-horse wagon prospecting for silver. We
  struck it, and sold out to parties in Tucson for $25,000. They paid our check
  at the bank in silver—a thousand dollars in a sack. We loaded it in our wagon
  and dr