title: Bait & Switch: Saving Your Relationship After Incredible Romance Turns Into Exhausting Chaos
author:  Megan Hunter 
description: <DIV><BR><EM>In her book Bait & Switch, Megan Hunter addresses an important facet of parental relationships, and of our society in general: How can we handle, survive, and even thrive in relationships with a very difficult partner? That is, with partners who may be very attractive in some ways, yet have a personality skewed by a fear-based, threat-based view of the world. This personality issue renders relationships very challenging.</EM><BR><BR><EM>Based on her years of experience in this field, Megan proposes an effective and simple strategy based on connecting, shifting, honesty, and consequences. Connect with the emotional brain (right) to control the fire. Then shift to the analytic brain (left) to activate the thinking. This is something that we can all do and practice. Thank you Megan for articulating such a clear strategy that will help many of us.</EM><BR><STRONG>--Frederic Bien, PhD,</STRONG> President, Personality Disorder Awareness Network (pdan.org)<BR><BR><EM>With extraordinary insight, Megan Hunter provides clear and usable strategies and skills for ending the chaos of high conflict relationships. Backed up by science, she provides the reader a detailed prescription for turning around behaviors and relationship patterns for the better. If you want to save your relationship, this book will show you how. If your relationship cannot be saved, this book will help you understand why, and provide you the groundwork for co-parenting after divorce and better relationships in the future, if that is where your path leads. This is a valuable piece of work.</EM><BR><STRONG>--Angie Hallier</STRONG>, Divorce Attorney, Fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, and author of <EM>The Wiser Divorce  Positive Strategies for your Next Best Life</EM><BR><BR><EM>Wondering, How did I get here? In her exceptional book, Bait & Switch, international speaker Megan Hunter provides meaningful insight for people who sailed into love on a wave of excitement only to find themselves living inside a storm. This book is a must-read for anyone in love with a person with borderline personality traits making meaning out of the chaos while bringing skills and hope in an ocean of despair.</EM><BR><STRONG>--Lynne Kenney, PsyD</STRONG>,pediatric psychologist, international educator, and author of <EM>The Family Coach Method</EM> and <EM>Bloom: 50 Things to Say, Think, and Do to Help Anxious, Angry, and Over-the-Top Kids</EM><BR><BR><EM>Megan Hunter has successfully tackled one of the biggest topics of today: What do you do when your great relationship turns into a struggle? She gives numerous practical tips on what you can do and how to influence your partner. She combines her experience and observations from working with hundreds of couples as an administrator for family court systems and as a business manager, to give the reader encouragement and hope!</EM><BR><STRONG>--Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.</STRONG>, president of the High Conflict Institute, and author of </EM>Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder</EM> and <EM>So, Whats Your Proposal?</EM><BR></DIV><br /><br /><div><BR>&#147;<I>In her book Bait & Switch, Megan Hunter addresses an important facet of parental relationships, and of our society in general: How can we handle, survive, and even thrive in relationships with a very difficult partner? That is, with partners who may be very attractive in some ways, yet have a personality skewed by a fear-based, threat-based view of the world. This personality issue renders relationships very challenging.</I><BR><BR>&#147;<I>Based on her years of experience in this field, Megan proposes an effective and simple strategy based on &#145;connecting, shifting, honesty, and consequences.&#8217; Connect with the emotional brain (right) to control the fire. Then shift to the analytic brain (left) to activate the thinking. This is something that we can all do and practice. Thank you Megan for articulating such a clear strategy that will help many of us.</I>&#8221;<BR><B>--Frederic Bien, PhD,</B> President, Personality Disorder Awareness Network (pdan.org)<BR><BR>&#147;<I>With extraordinary insight, Megan Hunter provides clear and usable strategies and skills for ending the chaos of high conflict relationships. Backed up by science, she provides the reader a detailed prescription for turning around behaviors and relationship patterns for the better. If you want to save your relationship, this book will show you how. If your relationship cannot be saved, this book will help you understand why, and provide you the groundwork for co-parenting after divorce and better relationships in the future, if that is where your path leads. This is a valuable piece of work.</I>&#8221;<BR><B>--Angie Hallier</B>, Divorce Attorney, Fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, and author of <I>The Wiser Divorce &#150; Positive Strategies for your Next Best Life</I><BR><BR>&#147;<I>Wondering, &#145;How did I get here?&#8217; In her exceptional book, Bait & Switch, international speaker Megan Hunter provides meaningful insight for people who sailed into love on a wave of excitement only to find themselves living inside a storm. This book is a must-read for anyone in love with a person with borderline personality traits making meaning out of the chaos while bringing skills and hope in an ocean of despair.</I>&#8221;<BR><B>--Lynne Kenney, PsyD</B>,pediatric psychologist, international educator, and author of <I>The Family Coach Method</I> and <I>Bloom: 50 Things to Say, Think, and Do to Help Anxious, Angry, and Over-the-Top Kids</I><BR><BR>&#147;<I>Megan Hunter has successfully tackled one of the biggest topics of today: What do you do when your great relationship turns into a struggle? She gives numerous practical tips on what you can do and how to influence your partner. She combines her experience and observations from working with hundreds of couples as an administrator for family court systems and as a business manager, to give the reader encouragement&#151; and hope!</I>&#8221;<BR><B>--Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.</B>, president of the High Conflict Institute, and author of </I>Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder</I> and <I>So, What&#8217;s Your Proposal?</I><BR></div>
zlib_text: He didn’t look like an attorney
  His dark wavy hair was tidy enough and he wore a well-cut, charcoal suit…
  but something about his sprawling pose said I-make-my-own-laws-thanks-
  very-much. And yet he definitely wasn’t a client. Megan could tell from the
  way the other ambulance-chasers were angled toward him. As if he was the
  chief of some unruly tribe.
   
  Still laughing, relaxed in a way Megan didn’t think she’d ever been, he let his
  gaze wander the room. She didn’t bother to glance away—people tended to
  overlook her. In court her lack of visibility was a secret weapon. With her
  dad, it was a pain in the butt and a childhood resentment she knew she should
  have gotten over by now.
   
  To her surprise, the guy didn’t look past her for a more out-there woman. He
  grinned at Megan. Nothing flirtatious, just friendly, one side of his mouth
  quirking in a way that was…
   
  Delicious.
  
   
  Dear Reader,
   
  Romance novels have changed a lot since I read my first one at age fourteen.
  But for me, my favorit