title: Amends
author: Cindy Day
description: Cindy Day revisits the sometimes disappointing, sometimes devastating scenes of memory in order to recover and redistribute love. Twice a year, sometimes more, / I drive from my present into my past, she writes in the first poem in the collection, and a few stanzas later, almost humorously, I practice lowering my expectations. But as Day writes bravely and sometimes ironically through a process of recovery, she reveals that her speakers need not travel back in time to re-discover old losses. Alienation and fear arise often in the lived, moment-to-moment mundanity of sober life. And when a speaker claims with slight disbelief, It must be me / you love, we know this as a fundamental, healing self-love. And Day is right, Love is too small a word for it. Indeed, these poems finally enact a courageous acceptance. -Jesse Nissim, author of Day cracks between the bones of the foot This is a book about returning, returning to the mystery of a wounded childhood, returning to examine the inescapable legacy of inherited alcoholism, returning to say "all the things that could never be said." Cindy Day's lyric narratives take us on a journey toward healing and forgiveness, toward making restitution, not only to others who might've been hurt along the way, but to the restored self who, in the end, can finally say "yes." How fortunate we are to encounter such wisdom, and generosity of spirit. -Eileen Moeller, author of Firefly, Brightly Burning "Fear is a story I tell myself," the narrator of Amends tells us. It is a painful but poised story in this graceful first collection of poems. Through a childhood where "being herself / is wrong" and adulthood battles with alcoholism, these poems are crafted with a quiet bravery that belies their protagonist's uncertainties. "Who would I be if I were not this / ratty victim?" she asks in the title poem-then shows us, in the book's moving and assured conclusion. Amends is an impressive debut. -Philip Memmer, author of The Storehouses of the Snow
zlib_text: Contents
   
  Title
  Copyright
  1 - Cindy
  2 - Cindy
  3 - Cindy
  4 - Cindy
  5 - Landon
  6 - Cindy
  7 - Cindy
  8 - Daniel
  9 - Cindy
  10 - Cindy
  11 - Landon
  12 - Cindy
  13 - Landon
  14 - Cindy
  15 - Chase
  16 - Cindy
  17 - Landon
  18 - Cindy
  19 - Cindy
  20 - Daniel
  21 - Cindy
  22 - Cindy
  23 - Daniel
  24 - Landon
  25 - Cindy
  26 - Chase
  27 - Cindy
  28 - Cindy
  29 - Landon
  30 - Cindy
  31 - Cindy
  32 - Daniel
  33 - Cindy
  34 - Cindy
  35 - Landon
  36 - Cindy
  37 - Cindy
  38 - Landon
  39 - Cindy
  40 - Chase
  41 - Cindy
  
  42 - Cindy
  43 - Landon
  44 - Cindy
  45 - Cindy
  Bonus
  About the Author
  
  Broken In
   
  By Cassie Cole
  
  Copyright © 2018 Juicy Gems Publishing
   
  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any
  form without prior consent of the author.
   
  Edited by Dorothy Eller
   
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  1
   
  Cindy
   
  I knew it was going to be a bad day the moment I woke up. 