title: Thinking Out Loud: Love, Grief and Being Mum and Dad
author:  Rio Ferdinand 
description: '<b>Achingly raw and emotional</b>'<b><i>SUNDAY TIMES MAGAZINE</i></b><br /><br />'So much <b>more than your standard, brittle career retrospective</b> ... <b>A winningly open account</b> of the former Manchester United captain's attempt to cope with life and fatherhood after the loss of his wife, Rebecca, to cancer - realities for which Ferdinand was scarcely prepared by the world of top-level football, a bubble so minutely protective that even the clipping of his toenails was done for him'<b><i>THE TIMES</i></b><br /><br />'Rio's honesty is<b> astonishing</b>, and <b>will change how men grieve and how men think about their feelings</b>. This is a ground-breaking book'<b>Julia Samuel, Founder Patron of Child Bereavement UK and best-selling author of GRIEF WORKS</b><br /><br />'Rio Ferdinand's <i>Thinking Out Loud</i> ... is<b> a lacerating account</b> ... This <b>painful but necessary </b>book is written with the Guardian journalist Decca Aitkenhead, who has herself lost a partner. Not very Christmassy, perhaps, but probably the best way to spend your 20 in the celeb market this year'<b><i>EVENING STANDARD</i></b><br /><br />'Ferdinand's<b> powerful</b> new book [is] a <b>detailed and inevitably very raw</b> description of how he has tried to cope with life after the loss of his wife'<b><i>THE TIMES</i></b><br /><br />'<b>Tender, heartbreaking ... An extraordinary and unforgettable book *****</b>'<b><i>HEAT</i></b>
zlib_text: There were plus signs; double pink lines; double blue lines; double black lines; two
  dots; a smiley face; a big Y; and the topper, the one that just announced it: PREGNANT.
  “Oh, no,” I breathed out.
  Oh, yes, she sure is!
  Camdyn Riordan is not ready to have a baby—she’s the one who lost the class guinea pig in
  second grade, she’s the one who now won’t keep a boyfriend long enough to leave a toothbrush at his
  house!
  And there’s another wrinkle: the father is César Hidalgo, the famous football player, the guy who
  ran out of her house so fast after their night together that he left a jet trail in his wake.  The guy with a
  list of past girlfriends as long as his hard, muscular arm.
  They’re going to be parents, but first, they’re going to be roommates, and then maybe they’ll be
  friends.  But there is no way—NO WAY—that this is going to turn into some kind of love story, no
  matter how much Camdyn likes him, no matter how sweet he is, no matter anything.
  Absolutely not.  Even though César is p