TEXT: A 4-6 HOUR CONVENTION ADVENTURE FOR
  With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser IV: 
  With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser IV: 
  The EverCandy Story
  The EverCandy Story
  
  1
  Michael Miller 
  Charlie / Design and Layout 
   
  Jeff Felson 
  Mike Teevee / Cover Art 
   
  Joel Baker, Jack Brown, Shawn DeLoach, Christian 
  Nelson, Eric O’Denius, and Paul Rubenis 
  Oompa-Loompas / Playtesting 
   
  The Computer 
  Willy Wonka
  With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser IV: 
  The EverCandy Story
  Typical Silly Paranoia Introduction™ 
  Greetings, Citizen!  Congratulations on 
  downloading this ﬁne Adventurelyke document.  
  While I’m not one of the High Programmers from 
  Honesdale, hopefully you will enjoy this mission as 
  much as I’ve enjoyed creating it. 
  If any of you still reading are less than 
  Ultraviolet clearance, shame on you!  Turn yourself 
  in right now at that confession booth across the way.  
  Get a move on!  Hup, 2, 3, 4, hup, 2, 3, 4.  That’s a 
  good clone. 
  The “With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser”  series 
  of adventures have been run at Con of the North for 
  the last four years.  Here’s to a much longer run than 
  that. 
  Paranoia, the All-Seeing Eye of the Computer, 
  and other such things are trademarks of West End 
  Games, and are used without permission.  This 
  product was not made by and is not authorized by 
  West End Games. 
  Mentos is a trademark of Van Melle USA. 
  This document Copyright © 1999 Michael Jay 
  Miller, all rights reserved. 
  This document was made with Multi-Ad 
  Creator2™ 1.5.
  WARNING! 
  This document is classified 
  Ultraviolet.  Reading of this 
  document by those of Violet 
  clearance or below is Treason, 
  punishable by being test 
  subjects for the latest HPD&MC 
  snack food commercials!
  
  2
  0.
  Introduction
  0.0
  Welcome!
   
  Welcome back to the wonderful, wacky world of 
  Paranoia, Honored Citizen!  This adventure is 
  designed to ﬁt within a four hour time slot at most 
  conventions, or a six hour slot with some time to 
  spare for breaks, secret dealings, and other such 
  typical Paranoia happenings. 
  This document is not intended for use alone; 
  you will also need the pack of handouts found at the 
  same place you found this one.  They include the 
  forms for use in the adventure, plus form data from 
  Parody-U-MAN-4 and the MAN sector clones, in 
  case you don’t want to use your own set of brieﬁng 
  ofﬁcers, R&D techs, and ﬂunkies. 
  They also include a list of suggested props for  
  use during the adventure.  Props make every 
  adventure more fun, right?  You may notice the lack 
  of weapons in the list.  The convention I’ve run this 
  at doesn’t allow weapons or weapon-like objects 
  (keeps down on the potential liability claims, that 
  sort of thing).  Besides, they’re easy to add. 
  0.1
  Backstory
   
  Fifthday Evening, 18-02-209 AC: A High 
  Programmer (Clean-U-MAN) in HPD&MC found a 
  cache of information about the Old Reckoning 
  device known as an “Automatic Car Wash”.  The 
  description of the device lead him to believe that it 
  could easily be adapted to serve Infrareds, 
  increasing their Hygiene statistics tenfold. 
  Sixthday Morning, 19-02-209 AC: An Armed 
  Forces Vulturecraft is sent out to ﬁnd a building 
  matching the description given by Clean-U.  After a 
  couple hourcycles of ﬂying around Alpha, they ﬁnd 
  one.  The Vulture reports back to base. 
  Sixthday Afternoon, 19-02-209 AC: A mission 
  was formed to adventure out into the Outdoors to that 
  site and bring back any knowledge of the “Automatic 
  Car Wash”.  Instead, they ﬁnd a few rolls of Mentos, 
  which have absorbed radiation for years and have 
  become the EverCandy.  Eating one bestows extreme 
  power upon the clone who does (or maybe death, but 
  that’s not that unusual for pills in Alpha). 
  Sevenday Morning, 20-02-209 AC: Two clones 
  return from that mission glowing Ultraviolet.  They 
  appear to be immune to weapons, and they have 
  strange powers over the Citizens of Alpha Complex. 
  0.2
  The Adventure
   
  This leaves us at the adventure, which proceeds 
  as follows: 
  Section 1: Breakfastcycle at Tiff-I-ANY’s. 
  The Troubleshooters are sent home after a long 
  Sixthday of working.  Waking up the next day, they 
  can eat or go to a Computer Rally, then are called in 
  for another mission.  They then survive getting to 
  the subsector they are sent to. 
  Section 2: R&D Surprise 
  Having arrived at the subsector, they must 
  ﬁgure out how to get in, assign MBDs without 
  killing too many clones, and escape the Complex 
  before amassing many multiple millions of 
  mandatory monetary ﬁnes. 
  Section 3: Another Bad Trip 
  Outside the Troubleshooters encounter Big 
  MICs, Infrared roads, two tribes reliving past glories, 
  and ﬁnally the Stop ‘N’ Rob
  ®.  Inside the Stop ‘N’ 
  Rob
  ® they ﬁnd some Mentos, dead clones, their 
  equipment, and other fun items.  On their way back, 
  they can try out new weapons against another Big 
  MIC or whatever is left of the tribes. 
  Section 4: Hostile Takeover 
  Upon returning to Alpha, the Troubleshooters 
  discover that the two clones they saw before are 
  leading a mob towards CPU Central.  Hopefully 
  they will have ﬁgured out what to do and can stop 
  the traitors with a minimum of destruction to The 
  Computer’s valuable property and Citizens.  Yeah, 
  right. 
  Section 5: Debrieﬁng and Exeunt 
  Finally, the Troubleshooters are brought back to 
  Troubleshooter Headquarters and are questioned 
  about their mission.  Hopefully they brought back 
  everything they left with. 
  
  3
  1.
  Breakfastcycle at Tiff-I-ANY’s
  1.1
  Morning
   
  As always, Bold Text is for reading to your 
  players. 
  “What a daycycle,” you think to yourself as 
  you stumble back to your Red dormitory and 
  collapse into your bunk.  Your team spent the 
  entire daycycle chasing Commies around a 
  heavily-trafﬁcked PLC shopping area, only to 
  have them caught by Blue Troopers.  They were 
  gracious enough to allow you to ﬁll out all the 
  paperwork, though.  It’s good to be back in your 
  nice bunk, and you quickly drop into slumber. 
  (Get your group to make sleepy-sleepy noises of 
  different types.  Once they have a nice loud snore 
  chorus going, continue on with the text.) 
  Ahh, Sevenday.  Every Citizen loves Sevenday 
  because it is the daycycle clones are given time to 
  relax, watch some Live-Action Commie Combat, 
  and go to the mandatory Serve the Computer 
  rallies.  Friend Computer even gives Clones the 
  option of sleeping in on Sevenday for almost 10 
  whole minutecycles! 
  (Egg your players on to ooh, ahh, and praise the 
  wisdom of The Computer.  Scribble some on a 
  notepad while looking sternly at anyone not 
  participating.) 
  The only bad thing about this Sevenday is that 
  you were randomly assigned “on call” status, in 
  case there’s some kind of emergency.  Nothing 
  much to worry about there, as you’ve never been 
  called in on your daycycle off. 
  At ten minutecycles after your normal Wakey-
  Wakey time...EHHHNT!  EHHHNT!  EHHHNT! 
  The Wakey-Wakey alarm goes off.  A tape of Teela-
  O-MLY, beloved symbol of all of Alpha, ﬁres up as 
  it does every daycycle. 
  “OK Citizens, time for your morningcycle 
  Troubleshooter Calisthenics!  Everyone out of bed 
  and on your feet!  Arms up! Index Finger Out, and 
  Curl, 2, Two, 2, Three, 2, Four, 2, Five, 2, Six, 2, 
  Seven, 2, Eight, 2, Nine, 2, Ten, 2!  All right!  Now 
  shake those hands out and prepare for Laser Draw 
  practice!  Hands at your sides, ready, and, Draw, 2, 
  3, 4, Again, 2, 3, 4, That’s right, 2, 3, 4, Last time, 2, 
  3, 4, and rest!  Have a great day, Citizens!” 
  Before we continue, I need to know if your 
  Troubleshooter is going to: 
  1. Go eat ﬁrst, then hit a Serve the Computer 
  rally, or 
  2. Have fun at the rally, then have breakfast. 
  Troubleshooters who go to the rally ﬁrst won’t 
  get breakfast.  Troubleshooters who go eat will be 
  penalized at the debrieﬁng for not going to the 
  mandatory rally.  You may also have some wise 
  Troubleshooters who sneak out on the way to check 
  Secret Society messages.  There’s a sidebar at the end 
  of this section for them. 
  After your Troubleshooters decide where they’re 
  going, break them up into two groups and run them 
  through their respective encounters: 
  1.1.1
  Breakfast
   
  Heading out early to the Red level cafeterias is 
  always a good idea on Sevenday, as they ﬁll up fast 
  with clones coming from the Serve the Computer 
  rallies. 
  As usual, it’s pretty busy.  The food line 
  stretches out of the Cafeteria a ways.  After a wait, 
  you get your food and sit.  Munch munch munch. 
  (Hand out the breakfast cereal packets and 
  watch them eat like good little clones.) 
  Mmmmmm, good.  As you’re cleaning your 
  hands, you notice something written on your 
  hygiene packet. 
  Hand each of the Troubleshooters one of the 
  prefab notes from their Secret Society.  Then tell this 
  group to wait while you continue with the other 
  group. 
  1.1.2
  Serve the Computer Rally
   
  Friend Computer is always appreciative of 
  clones who go to the mandatory Serve the 
  Computer Rallies on Sevenday.  You sit down in 
  one of the benches and open the Songbook to 
  today’s song. 
  
  4
  Strange...inside this book is a note. 
  (Hand out more prefab notes) 
  The music begins to play from every 
  loudspeaker in the area, and you all begin to sing: 
  I recommend the song from the back of the 2nd 
  Edition GM Screen, which is also in the Red Ready 
  Reference Sheets.  Whatever you give them to sing, 
  near the end of the song continue to Section 1.2. 
  1.2
  Interruption!
   
  Wherever the Troubleshooters are, they receive a 
  page.  Of course, an Alpha Complex Com Unit page 
  goes something like: 
  “ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT ALERT” 
  at the top of its electronically-generated voice.  
  The page tells them to report to a confession booth 
  for a private message, and gives them the mission 
  code MAN-WJBL.IV. 
  All the clones around them are looking at them 
  funny for disturbing their breakfastcycle or song.  
  Hopefully the Troubleshooters back out gracefully 
  and head to the nearest confession booth.  
  Convincing Friend Computer that you don’t have 
  anything to confess may be an interesting 
  experience. 
  Eventually they’ll report in and give the mission 
  code from their Com Units.  Continue on with: 
  Upon giving the code shown on your Com 
  Unit, Friend Computer says “Please wait.” 
  A minutecycle or so later, a High Programmer’s 
  image appears on the screen.  There is a ton of 
  interference, and every so often the picture blinks 
  to static and back, like a transmission from a 
  damaged ship on Star Trek:The Next Generation. 
  “Troubleshooters, thank you for responding 
  quickly to my message.  I am Parody-U-MAN-4, 
  Head of Troubleshooter Operations for MAN 
  Sector.  This is a mission of the utmost importance 
  and urgency.” 
  At this point the screen changes to show two 
  other clones dressed as Troubleshooters.  However, 
  they have Ultraviolet jumpsuits and seem to be 
  glowing Ultraviolet.  Even their lasers are squeaky 
  clean, and glowing.  A team of Blue Troopers is 
  huddled behind a barricade.  They have cone riﬂes, 
  laser cannons, and some larger weaponry you’ve 
  never seen before. 
  Parody-U-MAN continues: “These two clones 
  were Rule-R-ALL and Lame-R-GUY.  They were 
  part of an expedition sent to the Outdoors to obtain 
  information about a device rumored to [freeecx 
  garble formbale bleck] which would be a boon in 
  the Infrared quarters.  We are unsure what 
  happened to them as their mission unfolded, as we 
  do not have their mission records available.  We do 
  know that the other four members of the mission 
  team have had replacements activated, so 
  something did happen out there.” 
  Now the Blue Troopers open ﬁre.  Ordinance of 
  all types ﬂies at the two, who stand there waiting.  
  You’re not sure, but before explosions ﬁll the hall 
  you think you can see a cone riﬂe shell bounce off 
  one of them.  Your view of them and the troopers is 
  blocked by smoke as he continues. 
  “These two returned to Alpha as you see them.  
  They have been walking through Security 
  checkpoints with very little trouble.  I need your 
  team to go out and see what it was that this group 
  found, and ﬁnd some way to stop it.  On this end, 
  we shall do what we can to slow them down before 
  they threaten all of Alpha Complex.” 
  The smoke has cleared enough to see what 
  remains of the two.  You gasp to see that the entire 
  Blue Trooper squad has been reduced to smoking 
  boots, while the two glowing clones continue 
  down the corridor. 
  “There is a vehicle awaiting you at subsector 
  TBG-WNO-HGB.  You will also ﬁnd a map and 
  whatever equipment we can get there in time.  
  Unfortunately, there’s not enough time for a run to 
  PLC and R&D.  There should be a mission 
  summary sheet printing from your booth now.  
  Good luck, Troubleshooters!  All of Alpha 
  Complex is relying on you!” 
  Said mission summary sheet does print out from 
  all the confession booth’s printers.  Make printing 
  noises and hand each Troubleshooter one.  However, 
  the last one gets caught in the printer.  Rip it in half 
  before handing it to the Troubleshooter. 
  Troubleshooters now have an opportunity to 
  leave messages with their Secret Societies on the way 
  to the mission.  Once they’re (un) happy with the 
  situation, proceed to Section 2. 
  Section 1 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  5
  1.4
  Secret Society Notes
   
  Throughout most of this mission, the 
  Troubleshooters are pressed for time.  Thus, they 
  only have time to drop off and pick up notes from 
  their Secret Societies.  Each time they ﬁnd a way to 
  check in, they get a new note and have a minute or 
  two to write a new one. 
  Before getting breakfast or going to the rally, 
  they have no reason to contact their societies 
  (explain to them they already have the nightcycle 
  before). 
  No matter what, all the Troubleshooters receive 
  a message at their early stop:  Troubleshooters who 
  go eat will ﬁnd a note written on the wrapper of 
  their post-eating hygiene packet; those at the rally 
  will ﬁnd one stuck in their sing-along pamphlet.  
  These are printed in the handouts ﬁle. 
  Those who stop after the mission brieﬁng, but 
  before continuing to Section 2, can leave a note.  
  Hopefully they’ll remember to check back when 
  they come back from the Outdoors.
  GS
  Parody-U-MAN-4 
  Head of Troubleshooter Operations, 
  MAN Sector
   
  Stats: All 15s sounds good, except Power: 20 
  Mutant Powers: Machine Empathy, 
  Mechanical Intuition 
  Secret Societies: Computer Phreaks, Illuminati 
  Service Group: Troubleshooters 
  Armor: ALL30* Plot Contrivance Force Field, 
  UV Reﬂec (L6), Friend Computer 
  Weapons: UV Laser 
  * This really does mean All; even a Tac-Nuke 
  drops by 30. 
  Parody-U-MAN-4 is a youngish clone.  Unlike 
  most of his High Programmer peers he wears an 
  Ultraviolet version of the standard 
  Troubleshooter uniform, complete with Laser.  
  He is hated by many people for seemingly 
  caring about the performance and fates of his 
  inferiors, and has made a few enemies during 
  his rise. 
  Parody is the highest-ranking member of the 
  Computer Phreaks in MAN Sector.  Parody-
  MAN was actually his handle that he took as his 
  UV name upon ascension to that lofty status.  
  Friend Computer knows of this “mildly 
  treasonous” activity but also knows that Parody 
  “would never betray Alpha Complex”.  He has 
  ties to a few higher-ranking members of the 
  Illuminati; it’s rumored that they owe him 
  favors in trade for services rendered. 
  Note that this character is hugely 
  overpowered, as beﬁts most Paranoia High 
  Programmers; the fact that it also happens to 
  represent the Game Master is beside the point. 
  Parody-U-MAN-4 is included for 
  completeness, but feel free to replace him with 
  some other HP of your own devising.
  Section 1 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  6
  2.
  R&D Surprise
  2.0
  Introduction
   
  The Troubleshooters arrive at the designated 
  subsector, get their stuff, and head out into the wild 
  Outdoors.  (Oooooo!) 
  2.1
  MBD Argu...err...Handout
   
  Once they arrive at subsector TBG-WNO-HGB, 
  read this: 
  You arrive at the designated subsector.  This is 
  the end of a very large corridor, large enough to let 
  three tankbots drive alongside each other.  There 
  are two large doors that almost ﬁll the end of the 
  hallway.  These doors were covered with Research 
  and Development markings; Now they also have 
  laser scores, bullet marks, and other signs of 
  recently being ﬁred upon. 
  A guard stands in a booth on the left side of 
  the corridor.  Upon seeing you approach, he says  
  “Halt in the name of the Computer!  Show your 
  authorization to be in this subsector, Citizens!”  
  (This is Eye-G-OUG-3.)  The guard is training a 
  tripod-mounted repeating cone riﬂe at you. 
  Assuming the Troubleshooters ﬁgure out they 
  have to show their Mission Summary Forms (and 
  they haven’t used them to write notes on or 
  something stupid like that), the guard hands them a 
  box.  (Note that the Citizen won’t get his/her 
  Mission Summary Form back.)  Eye-G-OUG says 
  “You are to read the information contained within 
  the box.” 
  Inside the box is a set of Mission Badges, a 
  handheld Multicorder, a pillbox, a small tool kit, a 
  Notepad Mark II, a cleaning kit, a map of the area, 
  and a note: “You are to assign yourselves mission 
  duties in an orderly fashion  The secret password for 
  this mission is ‘The Jig is Up’.  Tell this to the guard 
  at the gate to continue.”  
  Wait for them to assign duties.  Watch as they 
  argue about who gets to be Team Leader or Hygiene 
  Ofﬁcer.  See if they walk up to the door and yell out 
  their secret password.  Eventually (assuming they 
  follow directions) Eye-G-OUG will open the door... 
  2.2
  Sp-Y-DOR’s Lair
   
  Slowly the doors open to reveal a huge room, 
  which resembles nothing more than an airplane 
  hanger.  Banks of processing equipment line one 
  wall, with R&D techs swarming around ﬁddling 
  with things.  Another set of double-doors is closed 
  opposite where you came in. 
  Standing in the middle of the room, with 
  spotlights shining down upon it, is...THIS!  
   (Brandish picture of Funbot from Send in the 
  Clones or other appropriate, possibly-known-to-
  your-players-as-a-hosejob bot or piece of equipment.  
  Pause for a few seconds and watch their reactions.  
  Laugh Evilly.  Anyone who displays knowledge of 
  the Funbot is, of course, being a bad clone.) 
  Waiting next to that is a large transbot.  Its 
  metal gleams like your teeth after a Hygiene 
  Inspection with Squeeky-Kleen (what a sheen!).  
  Its turret and attached weaponry looks prime and 
  ready for a ﬁght.  Its wheels are covered with fresh 
  syntherubber, and its entrance door is open, with a 
  stairway attached for the occupants to enter. 
  Next to THAT is one of the strangest transbots 
  you’ve ever seen.  It has a single mounted weapon 
  on top, with no turret to protect the ﬁrer.  It’s clean, 
  but there’s some rust in a few places.  The 
  windshield has a crack in it.  It looks like it’s 
  barely standing on its 6 legs.  An extension ladder 
  leads to the doorway, and a Yellow-clearance 
  citizen is climbing down it right now. 
  He walks over to you and says, “Hello, 
  Citizens!  I’m Sp-Y-DOR-5, currently in charge of 
  this Field Testing facility.  I assume you’re here for 
  a transbot.” 
    He holds out his hand toward whoever is Team 
  Leader.  That person should hand over their Mission 
  Summary form.  Note that they won’t get it back. 
  “Right, the urgent mission.  I’m glad you’re 
  going out there, because you’re going to be the ﬁrst 
  Troubleshooters to test my latest invention: the 
  WebCrawler Mark I All Terrain Vehicle!”  He leads 
  you over to the 6-legged transbot as he continues, 
  “Apparently, the Outside was once covered with 
  something called “World Wide Webbing”, and 
  
  7
  there were many battles fought between various 
  vehicles that traveled upon it.  They were called 
  things like “Navigator”, “Jimmy”, “Explorer”, and 
  “Outback”.  Unfortunately, I was sentenced to 
  execution for knowledge of these things, can you 
  believe it?  Like a good Citizen, I promptly shot 
  myself after I received the notice.  Of course, I was 
  demoted four times for killing an Indigo clearance 
  citizen, then promoted for shooting a traitor.”  He 
  shrugs and continues, “Ah, well, such is life.”  He 
  waves you all up into the WebCrawler.  
  The cockpit is covered with a number of 
  gauges and lights.  A joystick sits in front of the 
  pilot’s chair.  A hatch leads upward to the gun 
  mount.  There are four other seats inside the cabin.  
  GS
  The Sp-Y-DOR Webcrawler Mark I
   
  Speed: OK 
  Arms: Laser Cannon I (front), Mount (top) 
  Armor: ALL10 for those inside 
  The Webcrawler looks like a six-legged insect 
  from the Age of Peace, but blown all out of 
  proportion.  It’s a lot like a Cootie or GRMC.  
  The interior is utilitarian, with a bench seat for 
  three clones, a ladder going to the weapon 
  mount on top, a cockpit for two clones, and a 
  storage area.  The exit is on the middle of the 
  right side.  All seats have seat belts, but the 
  clones in the back may have to dig around for 
  them.  Woe betide any Citizen not wearing his or 
  her seat belt when the vehicle is in motion (I3 or 
  the Vehicular Accidents/Falling from Great 
  Heights table). 
  The armor is fairly decent, but comes with a 
  catch.  Transmissions to and from Alpha 
  Complex can’t happen from inside the 
  Webcrawler; they have to get out to call home. 
  The top mount point ﬁts a Cone Riﬂe or other 
  larger weapon.  The bot’s pretty sturdy except 
  for the legs.  It shouldn’t die unless the clones 
  really try to make it die, or you feel like asking 
  them for a marching order. 
  How the Joystick Works 
  Hopefully you were able to procure a joystick 
  for your players, one of the PC FlightSticky 
  kind.  The joystick I’m using has four buttons (a 
  trigger and three on the top of the stick), a point 
  of view hat, an on/off switch for autoﬁre, two 
  centering dials, and a throttle. 
  Here’s how it maps for the Troubleshooters: 
  The On/Off Toggle Switch turns on and off 
  the autopilot.  The autopilot only accepts 
  commands like in Zork (or Logo, if you prefer).  
  Thus, your Troubleshooters will be saying things 
  like “Go North, North, Turn Right 45 Degrees, 
  Go forward 150 meters.”  If the autopilot is 
  engaged, then the rest of the stick does nothing. 
  If the Troubleshooters say anything while the 
  autopilot’s turned on that the autopilot doesn’t 
  understand, it says “Part of that sentence was 
  not understood.  Awaiting directive.”  Practice 
  saying that until you can rattle it off quickly 
  with the same intonation every time, because it 
  makes a nice effect. 
  On manual, the Stick controls forward, 
  backwards, and sideways movement for the 
  selected legs.  The Three Buttons on the top of 
  the stick control left, right, and combined 
  movement.  To turn the bot, hold only one of the 
  left or right buttons down and push the opposite 
  way.  To move, hold down the middle button 
  and push the stick the way you want to go.  
  Pushing forward or backward with only the left 
  or right button (or all three buttons) held down 
  is bad: grinding noises, repair rolls... 
  The Throttle determines how fast the thing 
  goes.  The Other Dials alter the headlight and 
  interior lighting levels. 
  The Trigger ﬁres the front-mounted Laser 
  Cannon I, until it runs out of juice. 
  If you don’t have a joysticky thing then use 
  the control panel from the Second Edition book, 
  or make something up.
  A box marked “Mission MAN-WJBL.IV.  Do not 
  open until outside subsector TBG-WNO-HGB.” 
  sits in the rear of the bot. 
  Sp-Y-DOR gives you a quick rundown of how 
  the bot works (“Move the stick.”), then leaves you to 
  exit the Complex.  
  After they assign themselves seats, they can 
  move out.  More than likely they will crush the 
  Funbot in the process and gain themselves huge 
  piles of ﬁnes.
  Section 2 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  8
  3.
  Another Bad Trip
  3.0
  Introduction
   
  There’s three events we have designed for you, 
  along with the inevitable backstabbing, arguing, and 
  such.  They eventually make it to the Stop ‘N’ Rob
  ® 
  and ﬁnd a collection of mission equipment and the 
  former team. 
  3.0.5
  The Mission Equipment
   
  This could happen at any time during this part 
  of the adventure.  Once someone looks over the 
  trunk carefully, read this: 
  The box is a large trunk with an electronic lock 
  on one side.   Stenciled on it are the words “R&D 
  Mission Equipment Storage Device Mark XVII.  
  Insert Mission Summary Form to claim 
  equipment.”  Near the lock there’s a note that says 
  “Mission MAN-WJBL.IV.  Do not open until 
  outside subsector TBG-WNO-HGB.”  
  Inside the box they ﬁnd two cone riﬂes, 20 
  mixed cone riﬂe shells, 10 grenades, two laser riﬂes, 
  many Red laser barrels, a slugthrower (no bullets), a 
  mount to attach a cone riﬂe to the ﬁring seat on top 
  of the transbot, a Red Pad, and a clipboard.  All the 
  items are standard except for the Red Pad (see 
  below) and the clipboard. 
  The clipboard has the “42-23/5 List of Mission 
  Equipment” form on it.  There’s a sticky note 
  attached: “Sign, date, and lay on red pad after 
  following the instructions for the red pad.” 
  Assuming they do so, the Clipboard disappears, 
  to hose them in the debrieﬁng if they didn’t get 
  some clariﬁcation.  (There’s no Slugthrower shells or 
  scope for the laser riﬂes.) 
  3.1
  The Outdoors
   
  Slowly the double doors open to reveal 
  something you’ve never seen before.  There’s no 
  ceiling overhead, just a blue dome.  In front of you 
  is a transbot lane covered in brown ﬁlth, and to 
  either side of that is a Green-clearance carpeting 
  material.  Brown poles, some of which have Green 
  coverings attached, are everywhere. 
  Yup, it’s the Outdoors.  Remember to penalize 
  anyone who mentions words like Tree, Leaves, Sky, 
  Grass, or Squirrel.  They should dig out their Map at 
  this point and follow it. 
  3.2
  Where the Rubber Meets the Road
   
  The Brown poles stop at this point as you 
  approach a wide Infrared-clearance transbotway.  
  Both sides of the transbotway are bordered in 
  Ultraviolet, and a Yellow clearance dashed line runs 
  GS
  The Red Pad
   
  When they ﬁrst look at it, read this: 
  The Red Pad is approximately a meter long 
  and half a meter wide.  One side is covered 
  with a red cloth material, the other is a squishy 
  black substance.  You can feel something’s 
  inside it because the pad is stiff. 
  There’s a sticky note on the Red side: “Lay 
  on ﬂoor of transbot.  Place red side upright.  
  Do not otherwise touch the Red Pad.” 
  The Red Pad is an experimental Clone 
  Replacement Transporter, which will allow 
  clones to appear right on top of their pad.  
  Presumably, this means they will be safe inside 
  the transbot, in case a ﬁght is still going on. 
  However, bad things happen if someone is 
  already on the Red Pad when another clone 
  replacement is sent in.  If more than one clone 
  dies at nearly the same time (say, within a round 
  of each other) have each clone involved make a 
  Luck (Power) roll.   If only one clone fails the roll, 
  that clone may have some quirk from the 
  experience (changed/added mutant power or 
  stats, for example).  If more than one clone fails 
  they’re all teleported in as a monstrosity with two 
  arms, two legs, an extra-wide body, the head of 
  each clone that failed, and a low life expectancy.
  
  9
  down the middle.  There are breaks in both lines and 
  the transbotway itself seems poorly maintained.  
  The Troubleshooters have a moral dilemma on 
  their hands: should they break security clearance 
  and cross the Ultraviolet line to get to the nice, ﬂat 
  former highway, or should they trundle down the 
  side of the road?  Either way, they need to cross the 
  road when they get to the other dirt path, so they’re 
  just delaying the inevitable. 
  3.3
  Cockroaches, Again?
   
  Have whoever’s in the top seat make a 
  Chutzpah check to see when they notice the Big, 
  Mutated, Irradiated Cockroach (Big MIC) coming up 
  from behind, and change the readaloud as needed: 
  You’re bouncing along in the Webcrawler, 
  wondering if you’re going to miss the Sevenday 
  Afternooncycle episode of Teela-O-MLY’s 
  Spotlight on Traitors, when you hear a rumbling 
  sound from behind the WebCrawler.  (Off in the 
  distance/Nearly right behind you) you see 
  something that resembles your transbot, except it’s 
  Infrared colored and it’s (catching up with/ready to 
  smash you)! 
  The Big MIC has fallen in love with their 
  Webcrawler.  This Big MIC is smaller than the 
  GRMCs described in the Second Edition book, but 
  slightly larger than the Webcrawler.  Unfortunately, 
  it doesn’t know clonespeak, so the Troubleshooters 
  will have to either shoot it (not a great idea, as it’s 
  pretty strong) or ﬁgure out some way to stop it 
  before it gives the Webcrawler a hug. 
   
  3.3.5
  Hungry?
   
  Give each of the Troubleshooters who went to 
  the Rally a handout from the Hunger Handout 
  sheet.  Unless they have a supply of food, they take a 
  -2 penalty to all die rolls.  See what happens when 
  you don’t have your daily drug doses? 
  Clone Replacements of these clones have had 
  their meals, and thus don’t have the penalty. 
  3.4
  The War
   
  As your transbot climbs up over a hill, you see 
  a strange battle commencing.  There are two 
  groups lining up: one group has Violet shirts and 
  horns on their heads, while the other has Green 
  shirts and Yellow triangles on their heads.  One of 
  the Violets steps back and (throws something 
  brown/kicks something round) at your windshield.  
  Quick, what are you doing? 
  The Troubleshooters have come upon a rivalry 
  that has lived on despite the Oops: Football.  (I 
  recommend you swap out these two teams for a pair 
  known to your group.) 
  The brown oblong-shaped object (or UV/IR 
  spotted round object) will do absolutely no damage 
  to the Webcrawler.  The two groups will ignore the 
  Troubleshooters unless they do something stupid 
  like walking their bot through the middle of the 
  game or take the ball.  Helping one side causes a 
  ﬁght; interfering will cause them both to try to 
  capture the WebCrawler bot. 
  3.5
  The Stop ‘N’ Rob
  ®
   
  According to the map, you are almost at the 
  place with an X through it.  It should be just 
  around this corner.  (Clomp, clomp, clomp, clomp.)  
  Yup, as you round the bend, you see a building of 
  some sort.  It has a few metal boxes sitting out in 
  front of it.  There’s two doorways on the side you 
  can see, and a large transbot door on the left side. 
  This is a gas station.  The metal boxes have no 
  gasoline in them after this time.   Feel free to let 
  them set up creative camera angles, plot out strategy, 
  and prepare for the worst (build up this by asking 
  them exactly everything they’re doing).  However, 
  the clones will eventually venture inside.   When 
  they do: 
  GS
  The Big MIC
   
  Armor: ALL8 
  Weapons: Claw/Claw/Bite 10 (I14/I14/I15) 
  The Big MIC is a cockroach grown huge, and 
  now it can strike back at the humans that have 
  tortured its brethren throughout the centuries.  
  If you’ve ever seen Starship Troopers, you’ll 
  know what to do with these guys. 
  Big MICs can have a tough time hitting 
  something clone sized, so give to hit penalties as 
  you feel ﬁt to keep the adventure going well.
  Section 3 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  10
  This building may once have been some kind 
  of PLC pickup area, as storage racks are 
  everywhere.  One wall has a run of glass doors, 
  most of which have been shattered.  It also appears 
  that there was a ﬁght, as two clone bodies are lying 
  right in front of you.  One of them was cut in half, 
  and the other has a laser burn.  There’s a counter 
  on your right blocking your view of the other half 
  of the building. 
  When they walk around the counter, they see: 
  Two clone bodies lie here.  They are both 
  reaching towards a small stand which still has 
  some rolls of something in it.  One of the two 
  bodies is clutching one of those rolls.  The other 
  one is holding a standard-issue Multicorder.  Both 
  have laser burns. 
  If they examine the stand: 
  This stand apparently contained two variations 
  of something called “Mentos”.  One of them is a 
  “Mint” ﬂavor, and the other is a “Fruit” ﬂavor 
  (whatever fruit is).  All the Mint ones are gone, but 
  there are still a few rolls of Fruit. 
  ...and if they play the mission tape: 
  The tape starts off with the normal 
  Troubleshooter shenanigans, so you fast forward it 
  to the good part.  The Team Leader boldly leads his 
  team into the building (after sending in the 
  Hygiene ofﬁcer to make sure it was safe).  As they 
  explored the area, they found the candy stand.  
  One of the rolls is knocked onto the ﬂoor, and a 
  number of white pills roll out.  The Happiness 
  ofﬁcer grabbed one of the two rolls of candy (Mint) 
  and ate one.  He started glowing UV, upon which 
  the other clones started shooting and attacking him 
  for emitting a color over his security clearance.  
  The Team Leader, seeing that many weapons were 
  bouncing off, grabbed some too.  The other clones 
  died.  They fought each other for a bit, then came 
  to an agreement to share.  The record cuts off at 
  this point. 
   
  Hoo boy, that was a lot of readalouds for an 
  empty room, wasn’t it? 
  There’s a GameStuff box with information on 
  the experimental equipment on the next page. 
   
  3.6
  Time to Head Back
   
  Once they load up the bodies of their comrades, 
  (if they remember to) it’s time for the 
  Troubleshooters to head home.  If there are any of 
  the Tribespeople left, they may attack again.  Also, 
  the mate of the Big MIC may be waiting around for 
  the Troubleshooters to test their experimental 
  equipment on...err...get revenge for its fallen 
  “signiﬁcant other”. 
   
  Section 3 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  11
  GS
  Experimental Equipment
   
  FF7 Super Laser Riﬂe:  Basically a laser riﬂe with four slots for gems.  Assorted gems are in a box nearby.  
  Firing it without gems does very little damage (UV L2).  Firing it with gems causes weird things to happen. 
  Some examples: looks like a ﬂamethrower, looks like a wave of water, dragons ﬂy from the sky breathing on 
  whatever it was pointed at, and a giant yellow creature falls from above, crushing the target.  After the special 
  effect, a number pops out from underneath them.  This does L6 damage of a random color from whatever 
  color gems are in the gun.  Gems just happen to look like shiny, painted cone riﬂe shells.  (This is a special 
  effects gun for making missions look more exciting.) 
  Handheld BBB Synthesizer:  Dump water in top, out comes BBB (in one of four ﬂavors: Classic, New, Diet 
  Caffeine Free, and “The UnBeverage”).  Classic BBB has been used up.  There’s a big red button on the back 
  that causes the mini-fusion generator inside to explode after d20 secondcycles (treat like Tac-Nuke shell). 
  Fire & Ice Gun:  A combination ice and ﬁre thrower.  You can ﬁre one, the other, or both at once.  Firing 
  both at once can create any one of a number of undesired effects, and in addition on a malfunction it ﬁlls the 
  room with heated steam, damaging everyone without Field armor.  Other fun mishaps: Fire melts Ice ammo, 
  turning it into a water pistol; gun end shatters from freezing and heating... 
  James-B-OND Laser Pen:  A pen that can be a pen or a one-shot laser gun.  Hopefully they’re not pushing 
  the wrong way when putting it back in their pocket.  Ouch! 
  Force Nunchaku:  A set of nunchuks with one side that acts like a force sword.  This is the Mark II 
  variation, with an on/off switch that works (occasionally).  Just remember, don’t miss! 
  Portable CD Thrower:  A cross between a laser riﬂe and a CD player, this one shoots CDs at enormous 
  speeds.  Unfortunately, it takes a round to warm up between shots, and while in use it plays horrendous 
  tunes from the past, like Garth Brooks, Alanis Morissette, and AOL. 
   
  Name 
  Code 
  Damage 
  Type 
  Radius 
  Range 
  Ammo 
  S/A 
  Malfunction 
  FF7SLR 
  FRFL 
  UVL2/?L6 
  L 
  - 
  50 
  - 
  - 
  16 
  HBBBSynth 
  BBBS 
  -/20 
  F 
  -/160 
  200 
  1 
  A 
  19 
  F&I Gun:Fire 
  F&IG 
  10 
  F 
  - 
  20 
  10 
  S 
  17 
  F&IGun:Ice 
  F&IG 
  8 
  P 
  - 
  50 
  10 
  - 
  17 
  Laser Pen 
  JBOP 
  8 
  L 
  - 
  25 
  1 
  - 
  20 
  Force Nunchaku 
  FNCH 
  12 
  E 
  - 
  Melee 
  - 
  - 
  15 
  CD Thrower 
  PCDP 
  10 
  P 
  - 
  50 
  8 
  - 
  18 
   
  Section 3 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  12
  4.
  Hostile Takeover
  4.0
  Introduction
   
  The group returns to ﬁnd MAN Sector in a 
  shambles.  They get a call from Troubleshooter 
  Headquarters to ﬁnd out how the mission went.  
  They are then sent to capture the traitors and stop 
  them from taking over CPU Central.  Much 
  destruction of public property commences. 
  4.1
  The Triumphant Return
   
  Your battered, bruised, and tired bodies protest 
  as the Webcrawler makes its way back up the hill 
  towards Alpha Complex.  The security cameras 
  ﬁlm you as you approach the doors to Subsector 
  TBG-WNO-HGB, and they part for you. 
  Sp-Y-DOR-5 is directing you to park the 
  Webcrawler back where you found it.  After a 
  minor mishap involving a tool rack or two, you 
  manage to park it where he’s pointing. 
  (when they climb out) 
  A Red-level clone (Cou-R-IER-1) runs up to 
  your group and says “I...gasp...have a message... 
  wheeze...for mission MAN-WJBL.IV...gasp.” 
  Cou-R-IER will only take an Ofﬁcial Mission 
  Summary Form as proof of who they are.  They 
  won’t get it back.  Once someone gives him a form, 
  give them the Message from Parody-U-MAN-4. 
  After reading it, they should then contact 
  Parody-U-MAN-4, who will ask them if they found 
  out what was wrong.  If they did, great, send them 
  on.  If they didn’t, he will give them a chance to 
  suggest a plan.  Otherwise he will start grilling them 
  about the equipment, eventually telling them to 
  watch the tape.   (Said tape will then be eaten by the 
  tape viewer and the Troubleshooters will be docked 
  at the debrieﬁng for letting important evidence be 
  destroyed.  Shows them for not investigating 
  enough.) 
  Eventually, Parody-U-MAN-4 will order them to 
  head to CPU Central and stop the traitors. 
  4.1.5
  Shady Dealings
   
  Some Troubleshooters may decide that this is a 
  good time to hit the bathroom, clean their guns in 
  the closet, whatever.  If any of the Troubleshooters 
  go “looking for a message”, they get a response from 
  their previous question (if they asked one), and 
  there’s a society-wide note for them: 
  1. Illuminati and PURGE: Do whatever you can 
  to aid the member with the Ultraviolet Mentos.  Do 
  not reveal yourself unless there is no other choice. 
  2. Everyone Else: We must have a supply of that 
  candy!  Acquire some at all costs! 
  Less-intelligent players may catch on after a 
  couple conferences, or may not catch on at all.  
  Afterwards, everyone heads on over to CPU Central. 
  4.2
  The Final Battle
   
  You step out of the corridor to a magniﬁcent 
  sight.  A Red-Clearance walkway leads up to a 
  Green archway labeled “CPU Central”.  An empty 
  guard station sits nearby.  A tunnel leads off from 
  the archway, through which you hear a large group 
  of clones talking. 
  (The Troubleshooters can walk right in if they 
  want, but they should get a brevet from HQ.  Asking 
  for the brevet will cost them another Ofﬁcial Mission 
  Summary Form, but prevent premature clone 
  activation during the debrieﬁng.) 
  The archway leads to a Green-clearance 
  rotunda.  A large group of Citizens of many 
  clearances has gathered around the steps leading 
  into the main CPU Central building, which is 
  where the two traitors are standing.  One of them is 
  making a speech, while the other is guarding him. 
  Time to get out your M&Ms, Skittles, and other 
  colored items and run the Mass Battle!™.  Hopefully 
  the characters will have some Mentos to help them 
  through the tempest to come. 
  When the characters distinguish themselves 
  (Troubleshooters are pretty obvious when compared 
  to normal Citizens.  Most people aren’t carrying 
  
  13
  around Cone Riﬂes, Icethrowers, etc.), the two 
  traitors will take a fresh Mint Mentos.  Rule-R will 
  continue to speak and spur the Citizenry to attack 
  the Troubleshooters, while Lame-R will head over to 
  the most dangerous-looking Troubleshooter and 
  attack. 
  What the Troubleshooters should try to do is 
  weaken the shield around the two and get their 
  Mentos supply off of them.  They can rally loyal 
  Citizens against the evil ones, shoot lasers at them 
  until sheer mass of artillery wears the enemy down, 
  or try to go to hand-to-hand. 
  4.3
  Resolution
   
  If the Troubleshooters lose, either Deus ex 
  Computorae happens via means of a hearing-
  protected Vulture Squadron armed with 
  SubMachineLasers, or part of Alpha is taken over by 
  the Illuminati for their nefarious purposes--which 
  may not wind up any different from the real Alpha 
  Complex. 
  If the Troubleshooters defeat the traitors, the 
  remaining Citizens will wake up from their 
  Charming and wander off.  The Troubleshooters are 
  told to report to Troubleshooter Headquarters.  They 
  can take “side trips” along the way (but are docked 
  for being late.) 
  GS
  The Power of Mentos
   
  Mentos, in its radiation-altered form, is an 
  insidiously evil candy that provides a shield 
  against most attacks but also attacks the user 
  psychically to alter their brain. 
  When taken, the user’s security-clearance 
  badges and clothing changes to the color of 
  Mentos taken.  Also, a glowing shield of the 
  appropriate color appears around them.  This 
  shield initially provides protection from all 
  attacks as listed on the chart below, with one 
  exception: lasers of a higher security clearance 
  ignore the shield. 
  Every time a shield takes a hit, roll a d20: if 
  the number rolled is greater or equal to the 
  current rating, the rating drops by one. 
   
  Mentos Color 
  Armor Rating 
   
  Orange 
  ALL8 
   
  Yellow 
  ALL10 
   
  Violet 
  ALL18 
   
  UV (Mint) 
  ALL20  
  Also, anyone who is under the effects of any 
  form of Mentos gains the Charm mutant power 
  temporarily.  This special Charm only works on 
  Citizens of their Mentos color or below, and can 
  only be used if they are making a speech.  When 
  they try to Charm, have them make an Oratory 
  skill check, with a bonus of whatever shield 
  factor they may have remaining, plus a bonus or 
  penalty for any role-played speech they make.  
  Figure some number of citizens are affected 
  based on the result.  (Yup, they may hate him 
  even more!) 
  One unfortunate side-effect from the ingestion 
  of Mentos is the annoying theme that starts 
  playing every time someone eats one.  Playing 
  or singing this theme repeatedly may drive 
  players nuts. 
  Also, feel free to bounce a d20 when players 
  take one, and if it’s the number that clone’s 
  taken today or less some horrid interaction 
  happens. 
  Section 4 
  WJBL4: The EverCandy Story
  
  14
  5.
  Debriefing and Exeunt
  5.1
  It’s the End of the World as We Know It
   
  Ahh, the Debrieﬁng.  Here your Troubleshooters 
  can die horribly while ﬁngering each other. 
  The Green clearance guard leads you into one 
  of the many debrieﬁng rooms of MAN Sector 
  Troubleshooter Headquarters.  This one is in 
  reasonably decent condition: the chairs still have 
  some upholstery (but many laser burns), the 
  equipment drop location doesn’t look like it’s 
  taken a Tac-Nuke lately, and there’s even some 
  lighting in the section where you sit. 
  Behind an UltraGlass wall sits Parody-U-
  MAN-4, Sp-Y-DOR-3, and someclone you haven’t 
  seen before whose name is Tiff-I-ANY-5. 
  Parody-U-MAN, Sp-Y-DOR, and Tiff-I-ANY will 
  walk them through the adventure, asking about 
  every little detail.  Tiff-I-ANY is there to answer any 
  questions about the food ﬁght (if one happened) or 
  near the end. 
  Here’s a summary of things Friend Computer, 
  Parody-U-MAN, or Sp-Y-DOR may ask the 
  Troubleshooters about: 
  Not going to Breakfastcycle. 
  Not going to the Mandatory Rally. 
  Being Late to the Brieﬁng. 
  Destroying various R&D properties, including: 
   
  “The Funbot” 
   
  Computer Equipment 
   
  Large Transbot 
   
  Doors 
   
  Webcrawler 
   
  Devices picked up from the previous group. 
  Not completing mission orders. 
  Not returning various R&D Devices at the 
  debrieﬁng. 
  Not turning in an Ofﬁcial Mission Summary 
  Form when Parody-U-MAN asks for one. 
  Letting their tape be eaten by the R&D tape 
  player (not ﬁguring out what happened on the 
  mission on their own). 
  Entering CPU Central without getting a Brevet 
  allowing such travel. 
  Not saving Alpha Complex without Deus ex 
  Computorae. 
  Destruction of CPU Central, including: 
   
  Various clearance Citizens. 
   
  Various CPU Central Buildings. 
  Not handing over all Mentos left, if found out. 
  If they saved Alpha Complex on their own, 
  that’s probably worth bumping a bunch of Reds to 
  Orange (even if they died a couple times from 
  mutual ﬁngering at the debrieﬁng).  If they lost most 
  of their equipment and had to be rescued at the last 
  minute, send them to HPD&MC Sweetityme Candy 
  testing. 
  5.2
  Last, but not Least...
   
  After you’ve done everything else, I recommend 
  you have each player go through and say who they 
  are (Secret Society wise) and what they did 
  throughout the adventure.  Also tell everyone how 
  their Secret Society contacts made out.
  AN
  A Note from the Author
   
  Wow!  It was a lot more work than I expected 
  to take the normal set of scribbled notes and 
  pregen characters and turn it into a “published 
  adventure”.  I hope you enjoy reading it as 
  much as I enjoyed making this, because it’s been 
  a blast. 
  If you enjoyed this, or if you have any 
  constructive criticism to give about it, please 
  send it over to parody@io.com. 
  Michael Jay Miller 
  July, 1999
  
  With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser IV: 
  With Jumpsuit, Badge, and Laser IV:
  The EverCandy Story 
  by Michael Miller
  This product is not 
  authorized by West End 
  Games (but don’t tell 
  Friend Computer!)
  12704
  This adventure contains: 
  16 Pages of fun, fun, fun! 
  6 Player characters who will die, die, die! 
  8 pages of handouts, including almost useful 
  forms-forms-forms! 
  1 props list so your players can be hosed-
  hosed-hosed! 
  ...and more-more-more!
  http://www.io.com/~parody/
  Tell me, Citizen, are you looking for-- 
   
  Action? Like watching Troubleshooters avoid death by 
  Outdoors Monsters, Commies, and each other? 
   
  Adventure? Like seeing the intrepid Team Leader boldly stride 
  into the black depths of the unknown building, 
  surrounded by loyal teammates? 
   
  Romance? Something so far outside your security clearance 
  you should have shot yourself by now? 
   
  Look no further than the adventure you hold between 
  your sweaty palms right now!  Bring it up to the 
  counter and buy it before it’s too...oh, wait...we’re 
  giving this away for free, aren’t we?  Never mind.
  I TOLD YOU TO 
  WATCH THOSE 
  BETWEEN-
  MEAL SNACKS!
  Copyright © 1999 
  Michael Jay Miller, All 
  Rights Reserved.  
  Paranoia is a 
  trademark of West 
  End Games. 
  The Fruity Flavor of Treason 
  Two strange, glowing clones have returned to Alpha 
  Complex after failing their mission, and now they aren’t 
  following the orders of Friend Computer!  I’ll give you one 
  guess as to who gets to stop them from destroying the way of 
  life of all clones in Alpha. 
  Yeah, I was hoping it was Teela-O too. 
  
SOURCE: textdata/thevault/Paranoia [multi]/25th Anniversary/Paranoia 25th - The EverCandy Story.pdf