TEXT: We Is Goblins! 
  A silly RPG by Miguel Poonsawat 
  The Dark Wizard has been overthrown, evil has been 
  defeated and all across the lands peace now reigns. 
  However, they all forgot about the Goblins! 
  The Goblin King has gathered his most cowardly, 
  sneaky and pathetic minions to go forth and terrorise 
  the lands of men, elves and dwarfs (and to steal their 
  stuff) so that Goblins will be feared for the first time 
  ever! 
  You and your fellow dim-witted goblins have been 
  chosen to carry out some of the most dangerous 
  (pointless) missions for the Goblin King! If you 
  succeed you may get some extra crumbs for supper, 
  if you fail, it’s to the weasel pit with you! 
  What You Need: 
  You will need about a dozen six sided dice in two 
  different colours, a games master (GM), some 
  players, pens, paper and beer. Lots of beer.  
   
  Goblins: 
  Each player creates a Goblin to play as. Don’t grow 
  too attached, chances are the little fella probably 
  won’t last long.  
  Know-Wots:  
  Goblins don’t have stats like in other games (they are 
  far too weedy) and instead have a couple of Know-
  Wots that they have picked up that has helped them 
  survive. The Know-Wots that all Goblins can learn 
  are: 
  Sneaking (hiding, stealth, stealing etc.) 
  Run Away! (fleeing, dodging, leaping etc.) 
  Stab It! (fighting, strength, toughness etc.) 
  Shoot It! (spiting, shooting, throwing etc.) 
  Tinker (crafting, fixing, brewing etc.) 
  Bully (intimidate, command, riding animals etc.) 
  Listen Up! (spot, listen, smell etc.) 
  Grovel (pleading for mercy, manipulation etc.) 
  Wizarding (magic, healing, lore etc.) 
   
  All Goblins start with 10 points to invest in Know-
  Wots. Each point gives 1D6 for rolls using that Know-
  Wots. 
   
  Looks: 
  Looks are very important in Goblin society. Big 
  Goblins will easily bully others, weedy Goblins will be 
  experts at grovelling for their lives and small Goblins 
  may sneak better.  
   
  Each player picks two phrases to describe their 
  Goblin. If the description is somehow relevant to an 
  action that the Goblin is performing then the player 
  gains +1 to their dice rolls (for example a Scary 
  Looking Goblin would gain +1 to his Bully rolls). 
   
  Trinkets:  
  Goblins tend to carry pretty rubbish equipment. 
  Usually some form of rusty blade or blunted spear or 
  a tattered old shield. Trinkets give goblins bonus dice 
  to certain Know-Wots. For example, a sling would 
  give bonus dice to Shoot It! Rolls or a large fancy hat 
  may give a Wizardry bonus.  
   
  However because goblin equipment is so crappy, 
  Trinket dice are a different colour. If the dice rolls a 
  1, the Trinket breaks and gets worse by one dice. 
  This can be repaired with a successful Tinker roll.  
  All goblins start with 4 dice to make their equipment, 
  being free to spread their dice how they want (they 
  could blow all of it on a really big +4 shield for 
  example, or divide up the dice across a number of 
  items).  
  Trinkets can be used to represent mounts and 
  pets too.  
  The Rules: 
  Whenever a goblin tries to do anything that 
  isn’t walking, talking, eating or defecating, they 
  have to roll (goblins find even simple things 
  really hard at times). A goblin rolls 1D6 plus any 
  dice from a relevant Know-Wots. If a die comes 
  up as a 5-6 then it is a success (other creatures 
  pass on a 4-6). The more successes the better! 
  If a goblin rolls one or more 1s, bad things 
  happen to the goblin regardless if an action was 
  successful or not (the goblin stabs the dwarf but 
  loses his blade for example). 
  A GM sets a difficulty as a number of successes 
  needed to accomplish a task. For some rolls the 
  number of successes may mean a better result 
  (building a better item with Tinker for example). 
  Mobbing Up:  
  Goblins generally work in groups as it’s the only way 
  they will ever get anything done. If goblins work 
  together, one goblin performs an action and all other 
  goblins in the party add 1D6 to the attempt. 
  
  Bickering:  
  All Goblins secretly (or not so secretly) want to be in 
  charge. Whenever the Goblins disagree on 
  something like who goes first, who is going to 
  perform an action or who gets the loot etc.  
  Each Goblin rolls 1D6. Highest roll wins the 
  argument. If two or more Goblins roll a tie they lose 
  a turn as their argument escalates into pushing and 
  shoving.  
  Goblins can choose not to take part in an argument, 
  in which case they don’t roll and must accept 
  whatever the group decides.  
  Betrayal: 
  Goblins are not very loyal and are mostly kept in line 
  by fear. Goblins will do almost anything to save their 
  own green hides. At any point when something bad 
  happens to a Goblin, he can choose to have it 
  happen to another Goblin in the party.  
   
  The Goblin must single out another Goblin in the 
  group. The two will then roll off with the betraying 
  Goblin gaining +1 if it’s the first time he has betrayed 
  that particular Goblin this session (Goblins trust too 
  easily). If the betrayer succeeds the bad stuff 
  happens to the other Goblin.  
   
  If the betraying Goblin loses the roll the bad stuff 
  happens to him AND he suffers a point of Hurt 
  (possibly from karma, possibly from Goblin 
  retribution). 
   
   
   
   
   
  Fighting:  
  Goblins are generally not so good at it but they often 
  have to do it (it is their lot in life to tire the enemy 
  out before the orcs charge).  
  At the beginning of a fight the GM determines who 
  goes first, the Goblins or their enemies. Unless 
  setting up a sneaky ambush, Goblins always go last. 
  Goblins must bicker amongst themselves as to who 
  goes first amongst the Goblins in a turn. Once all 
  creatures in a fight have acted, the order resets and 
  the Goblins bicker for initiative again.  
  All Goblins (and their enemies) make an attack roll 
  using Stab It, Shoot It or Wizarding (or any other 
  relevant Know-Wots). The number of successes is 
  how much Hurt an attack inflicts. Goblins will have to 
  make a saving throw (using Stab It, Wizarding or Run 
  Away!). Each success will reduce the damage by 1.  
  Each Goblin can endure a total of 5 points of Hurt 
  before they die. So be careful! 
  Most creatures can endure 5 points of Hurt before 
  they die (but pass saves on 4+). Some other 
  creatures may be even tougher however they are 
  likely to paste the poor Goblins.  
  Pushing It:  
  All Goblins are weedy, but at times they are capable 
  of great(ish) feats! However such efforts tend to 
  cause problems such as pulled muscles, brain freeze 
  or a Goblin’s tiny heart exploding.  
   
  A Goblin can choose to suffer a point of Hurt to 
  double his dice for an action.  
   
   
  The Quest! 
  Before the game the GM rolls to see what quest the 
  Goblin King has sent the Goblins on. 
   
  Quest Generator 
  1. Kill 
  4. Defile 
  2. Steal 
  5. Burn  
  3. Eat 
  6. Spy on 
  Target People 
  1. Rival Goblin 
  4. Human  
  2. Dwarf 
  5. Orc 
  3. Elf 
  6. Halfling 
  Target Asset 
  1. Princess 
  4. Magic Item 
  2.Treasure 
  5. Flag 
  3. Food 
  6. Livestock 
  From…. 
  1. Village 
  4. Dungeon 
  2. Castle 
  5. Temple 
  3. Wizard tower 
  6. Caravan 
   
  At the end of the game all Goblins gain 1XP for each 
  of the following: 
  -Surviving 
  -Carrying out a successful Betrayal 
  -Not taking any Hurt 
  -Winning a round of Bickering (only once per session) 
   
  Once a Goblin earns 5 XP he can choose to gain a 
  point of Know-Wots, Trinket or another Look. For 10 
  XP he can gain a point of Hurt.  
   
  The Goblin with the least XP at the end of the 
  session gets thrown in the weasel pit by the Goblin 
  King. Everyone else gets extra crumbs! Huzzah! 
  
SOURCE: textdata/thevault/Other (Unique) Systems/Top Secret Games Two Page Tabletops/We Is Goblins.pdf