TEXT: Flip over for More
  Millennials are Killing is a horror-comedy RPG 
  about the ceaseless need of all people born 
  between 1982 and 2004 to destroy all that we 
  hold dear. Most players will take on the role of 
  Millennials who want nothing but destruction. 
  One player takes the role of a Baby Boomer 
  (BB) who responsible for managing a world 
  that helplessly watches as Millennials slake 
  their dark thirst.
  What you need
  · A six sided die or d6
  · Paper and pencils
  · Poker chips, glass beads, or  
    some kind of marking object
  · Access to the internet
  · 4-6 good friends
  Making a Millennial
  We all know that Millennials are different  
  from ordinary people. This game breaks  
  down those differences into Traits:
  Entitlement: This allows millennials to acquire 
  anything they desire. Most people have to  
  work for what they want, Millennials never 
  have to. Should they want something, it will  
  be served to them on a silver platter. 
  Players trying to acquire resources will  
  have to roll Entitlement.
   
  Social Media: Millennials have access to social 
  media like other generations, but unlike 
  everyone else, they don’t use it to share 
  pictures of Minions Telling it like it is. What 
  they do on Social Media is a mystery, the only 
  thing we understand is its destructive power.
  Any time a Millennial attempts something they 
  can justify as being related to the internet, they 
  will roll Social Media.
  Youth: Millennial bodies are nigh invulnerable. 
  Impossible physical challenges like running, 
  jumping, and queer sex pose no challenge to 
  them. If a Millennial is attempting a physical 
  feat they will roll Youth.
  A Fucking Attitude Problem: Millennials only 
  communicate through hostility, lectures, 
  references to media you don’t understand,  
  and memes. In a real-life social situation they 
  can use their Fucking Attitude Problem to make 
  perfectly normal things seem unacceptable.
  In social situations when the outcome is 
  uncertain, Millennials will always roll using  
  A Fucking Attitude Problem.
  Every Millennial starts the game with  
  4 Character Points which can be divided 
  between traits as they like. If a Millennial’s 
  character is a person of color, queer, or 
  a woman, they get a fifth point to spend 
  anywhere they like because of  
  Barack Hussein Obama.
  Every Millennial is dressed unprofessionally, 
  has a smartphone, and more money than you 
  remember having growing up, but not enough 
  to afford a home. 
  Playing the Game
  Setting up
  To begin play, the BB will have to pick a  
  target for our Millennials. To do that roll on  
  the Millenials are Killing chart with 2d6. 
  It is the Millennial’s goal to destroy  
  whatever target you provide for them.  
  
  Millennials are Killing 
  By James D'Amato
  Art: Eric Colossal
  Layout: Paulomi Pratap
  Consulting: Ian O'Dea | Tasha Robinson | Jen Gange
  Ryan Chilton | Max O | Evil Guacamole
  Although Millennials are creatures of  
  immense power, incomprehensible values,  
  and unthinkable cruelty, their task is not 
  simple. A Millennial cannot simply harness 
  the power of their Social Media to completely 
  destroy something like bar soap. It will take 
  a number of direct and indirect attacks from 
  them to kill their targets. In order for a target  
  to truly be killed, it has to be ruined to the  
  point that no one else can enjoy it. 
  Rolling
  During the game, players will have to roll  
  every time they want to do something that 
  would cause damage or has a chance of 
  failing. When making one of these checks, 
  players will roll a d6 and add any relevant 
  trait. If the result is 1-3, the Millennial fails 
  and society is unharmed. On a result of 4-6 
  a roll is immediately and evidently successful, 
  but this success will come with unintended 
  consequences that you can use to harm the 
  Millennials. Consequences can be anything 
  from a Millennial being immediately and 
  rightfully shamed, or something as far  
  removed as one of their favorite cartoons  
  being adapted to film with a cast they 
  disapprove of. Any result 6+ will have an 
  immediate and devastating effect, it will be 
  brutal and far-reaching. 
  If a Millennial successfully completes any 
  actions the player should describe their 
  immediate success. The BB will respond with 
  the effect the success has on the world. It is 
  important to emphasize the horror and dread 
  of Millennial success. Everything they do is a 
  direct attack against everything we understand 
  and hold sacred. Sometimes it will be 
  immediate as a crowd running in terror from a 
  Millennial using their Youth to crush a diamond 
  with their bare hands. Other times the effects  
  could be far removed like an especially dank 
  meme causing crops to fail, destroying the life 
  of an American Farmer. These should be short 
  but horrific scenes.
  Trophies
  If a player rolls a natural 6 on their die when 
  performing an action, they will receive a 
  Trophy. This is usually marked by a poker chip 
  or glass bead. Coins are not allowed because 
  Millennials are killing coined currency and 
  will never afford a home even with a /HUGE/ 
  stack of nickels. Anytime a Millennial player 
  receives a Trophy, all other Millennial players 
  will receive Participation Trophies, which are 
  mechanically indistinguishable from Trophies, 
  but we know they are unearned. At any time 
  before or after one of their rolls, a Millennial 
  can spend a trophy to increase the result by 1.
  Ending The Game
  A game of Millennials are Killing normally  
  ends with the Millennials successfully 
  destroying their Target. If you want to play  
  a shorter game, set a timer for one hour.  
  If the Millennials do not kill their Target  
  within the hour they become too lazy to 
  continue their hunt.
  
  god
  Self-Pity
  Beer
  marriage
  Department
  Stores
  Napkins
  Golf
  diamonds
  Lunch
  oil
  serendipity
  Focus  
  Groups
  motorcycles
  Real estate
  Vacations
  gyms
  Handshakes
  Movies
  football
  wine
  9-to-5
  jobs
  consumerism
  Baby Names
  The American
  dream
  Running
  Banks
  cruises
  yogurt
  bar soap
  cereal
  Hotels
  The Toyota
  Scion
  sex
  applebee's
  Fabric  
  Softner
  Nazis
  
SOURCE: textdata/thevault/Millennials Are Killing.pdf