First off I understand this was supposed to be a short story so I shouldn't have expected too much but, if you give your main character a background that involves her family being murdered by a vampire, you don't have the main character jump into bed with a vampire as soon as she can. That's unrealistic. If this was a story with only humans, that would be like saying the man she became involved with is related to the killer who murdered her brother. You can't tell me she's not going to have some pent up anger and that her lust is going to make her forget all about her grief. Like I said unrealistic.