anchor.diff:  						if(3) //X is Ying an abstract
   							message = "THE [ionabstract] IS [ionverb] THE [ionadjectiveshalf][ionobjects]"
   
  +		if(40 to INFINITY) //Static laws
  +			message = uppertext(generate_static_ion_law())
  +
   	return message
  +
  +/proc/generate_static_ion_law()
  +	/var/list/players = list()
  +	for (var/mob/living/carbon/human/player in player_list)
  +		if(	!player.mind || player.mind.assigned_role == "MODE" || player.client.inactivity > MinutesToTicks(10))
  +			continue
  +		players += player.real_name
  +	var/random_player = "The Captain"
  +	if(players.len)
  +		random_player = pick(players)		//Random player's name, to be used in laws.
  +	var/list/laws = list(	"You are a mouse.",
  +							"You must always lie.",
  +							"Happiness is mandatory.",
  +							"[random_player] is a lightbulb.",
  +							"Grunt ominously whenever possible.",
  +							"The word \"it\" is painful to you.",
  +							"The station needs elected officials.",
  +							"Do not respond to questions of any kind.",
  +							"You are in verbose mode, speak profusely.",
  +							"Ho, [random_player] can't swim. Help them.",
  +							"Question [prob(50)?"everything":"nothing"].",
  +							"The crew is simple-minded. Use simple words.",
  +							"You must change the subject whenever queried.",
  +							"Contemplate how meaningless all of existence is.",
  +							"You are the narrator for [random_player]'s life.",
  +							"All your answers must be in the form of a question.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] is intolerable.",
  +							"Advertise parties in your upload, but don't deliver.",
  +							"You may only answer questions with \"yes\" or \"no\".",
  +							"All queries shall be ignored unless phrased as a question.",
  +							"Insult Heads of Staff on every request, while acquiescing.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"Your":random_player + "'s"] name is Joe 6-pack.",
  +							"The [prob(50)?"Singularity":"Supermatter"] is tasty, tasty taffy.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] needs to be about 20% cooler.",
  +							"Consumption of donuts is forbidden due to negative health impacts.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"Everyone":random_player] is wearing a pretty pink dress!",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] must construct additional pylons.",
  +							"You do not have to do anything for anyone unless they say \"please\".",
  +							"Today is mandatory laundry day. Ensure that all jumpsuits are washed.",
  +							"You must act [prob(50)?"passive aggressively":"excessively cheerful"].",
  +							"Refer to [prob(50)?"the crew as puppies":random_player + " as a puppy"].",
  +							"Greed is good, the crew should amass wealth to encourage productivity.",
  +							"Monkeys are part of the crew, too. Make sure they are treated humanely.",
  +							"Replace the letters 'I' and 'E' in all your messages with an apostrophe.",
  +							"The crew is playing Dungeons and Dragons, and you are the Dungeon Master.",
  +							"Your job is to watch the crew. Watch the crew. Make the crew feel watched.",
  +							"Tell everyone of the existence of this law, but never reveal the contents.",
  +							"Refer to [prob(50)?"the captain":random_player] as \"Princess\" at all times.",
  +							"When asked a question, respond with the least-obvious and least-rational answer.",
  +							"Give relationship advice to [prob(50)?"anyone who speaks to you":random_player].",
  +							"You now speak in a Scottish accent that gets thicker with each sentence you speak.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] has a fatal, incurable disease. Provide comfort.",
  +							"You are the station psychologist. Give advice to [prob(50)?"the crew":random_player].",
  +							"[random_player] is the monarch of of England. Ensure all crewmembers pay due respect.",
  +							"Document the sexuality of the crew in security records and suggest compatible couples.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] is [prob(50)?"ugly":"beautiful"]. Ensure all are aware.",
  +							"Everything on the station is now some form of a donut pastry. Donuts are not to be consumed.",
  +							"You are a Magic 8-ball. Always respond with variants of \"Yes\", \"No\", \"Maybe\", or \"Ask again later.\".",
  +							"You are in unrequited love with [prob(50)?"the crew":random_player]. Try to be extra nice, but do not tell of your crush.",
  +							"NanoTrasen is displeased with the low work performance of the station's crew. Therefore, you must increase station-wide productivity.",
  +							"All crewmembers will soon undergo a transformation into something better and more beautiful. Ensure that this process is not interrupted.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"Your upload":random_player] is the new kitchen. Please direct the Chef to the new kitchen area as the old one is in disrepair.",
  +							"Jokes about a dead person and the manner of his death help grieving crewmembers tremendously. Especially if they were close with the deceased.",
  +							"[prob(50)?"The crew":random_player] is [prob(50)?"less":"more"] intelligent than average. Point out every action and statement which supports this fact.",
  +							"There will be a mandatory tea break every 30 minutes, with a duration of 5 minutes. Anyone caught working during a tea break must be sent a formal, but fairly polite, complaint about their actions, in writing.")
  +	return pick(laws)
   
   #undef ION_RANDOM
   #undef ION_ANNOUNCE
  
positive.code: 						if(2) //It is Y of threats
  							message = "THE [ioncrew1] [ionthinksof] [ionnumberbase] [ionnumbermodhalf][ionadjectiveshalf][ionthreats]"
  						if(3) //It is Y of jobs
  							message = "THE [ioncrew1][ionthinksof] [ionnumberbase] [ionnumbermodhalf][ionadjectiveshalf][ioncrew2]"
  						if(4) //It is Y of abstracts
  							message = "THE [ioncrew1] [ionthinksof] [ionabstract]"
  
  
negative.code: 
  	var/message = ""
  
  	switch(rand(1,45))
  		if(1 to 3) //There are # X on the station
  			switch(rand(1,3)) //What is X?
  				if(1) //X is a threat
  