Why should your friend ever change his flaky ways if he doesn’t know it bothers you? He may not even know that it is an issue at all unless you tell him so. A healthy friendship, like any good relationship, requires honesty and openness.Calmly but clearly explain to your friend that his unreliability causes you distress and inconvenience, and is having a harmful effect on a friendship that you highly value. For example:

"I know your life is very hectic right now, and you're trying to be a good friend by making all these plans with me, but the fact that you're always having to cancel at the last minute or don't show up at all is a problem for me. I love spending time with you as much as ever, but maybe we can work together on being more realistic about how often we can get together, until life settles down some for both of us."
"I know we all joke around about how you're always late for everything, but sometimes it causes real problems when we're late for something important. Can we work on finding some ways to make sure we're on time when it's important to be?"


Don’t raise the issue in a fit of anger after missing the beginning of yet another sporting event or concert because of his lateness. This is more likely to simply devolve into a shouting match with back-and-forth accusations that may imperil the friendship.
 One you’ve raised the issue, you can expect your friend to be a bit defensive and possibly hurt. Immediately discuss ways you can work together to address the issue in a way that will benefit the both of you. Make him feel like he is not the only problem and you are not somehow immune from blame.Can you find ways to build more time flexibility into your time spent together? For instance, can you start your plans with a “buffer” activity without a set starting time (like playing video games or running in the park) before going to a movie or social gathering that does have one? Can you work together to set up concrete plans for that road trip you keep talking about?
You can’t expect your friend to change completely, going from Mr. Flake to Mr. Reliable. By offering to take part in the necessary changes, you improve your odds of achieving some movement on his part.
For instance: "Whenever we come up with one of our road trip ideas, maybe we should look into it right then as a group to see if it's realistic or not. You shouldn't have to get stuck trying to set up everything, and neither should any of the rest of us."

, Especially once you’ve clearly expressed the problem and tried to work out mutual solutions to your friend’s unreliability, you may need to be more particular about ensuring that future episodes of being “blown off” do not go unmentioned or free of consequences.Establish a time limit for how long you’ll wait for him to show up — twenty minutes, an hour, whatever seems fair and sensible to you. If he doesn’t show, you go.
If your problem is a friend who never seems to return your calls, texts, posts, etc., then you may need to stop initiating contact for a period of time. Let your friend assume responsibility for initiating contact; if he refuses to do so, you may have exposed a fundamental weakness in the friendship.
For instance: "I'm sorry I wasn't there when you finally showed up. I waited for half an hour, and I don't think it would be fair to expect me to wait around any longer than that."

, This should be the last resort, but whenever it becomes clear that your friend has no intention of addressing his unreliability, even when he knows full well that it hurts you, it may be your only option and for your own good.If it is clear that your unreliable friend takes from the relationship without giving and does not truly care about your needs and concerns, then you are likely in a “toxic friendship” built on inequality and hurtfulness. Such toxicity can be bad for your emotional and even physical health.Breaking up with an unreliable friend is often no easier than breaking off a romantic relationship, but it is equally important to do so when the so-called friendship is a drain on your well-being. In both cases, present a calm, clear, honest assessment of why the relationship needs to end, told directly to the person.

How to Break Up focuses primarily on romantic relationships, but it may offer you some helpful advice on ending a relationship with a "toxic" friend as well.
Talk to your friend about it.
Meet your friend in the middle.
Create consequences.
End the relationship.
{"src": "wikihow-all_validation", "title": "How to Deal With a Friend Who Constantly Blows You Off2"}