It’s important to wait a few moments before responding to feedback, especially if it’s negative. You may regret responding with anger or extreme emotion after fully listening to what the other person has to say.Try taking three deep breaths after receiving feedback. If you still feel emotionally charged, take a few more breaths before responding.
 In order to be receptive to feedback, it’s key that you are open and refrain from getting defensive. This, in part, means being open to opinions and ideas that may differ from your own. Instead of trying to justify your actions or blame someone or something else, carefully listen to what is being said.If your boss criticizes you for being late, don’t immediately launch into a defense about the challenges of getting the kids to school before work or the horrible traffic you encountered. Try saying, “I’m sorry I was late. I will make it a priority to be punctual from now on.”
Other defensive reactions include accepting the feedback and then talking badly about the person behind their back or purposefully avoiding implementing the feedback out of spite. Being unresponsive to make the person uncomfortable, such as just staring and not answering their questions, is another example.
 Before responding emotionally, it’s important to understand exactly what is being said to you. Asking for details allows the giver of feedback to clarify his or her criticisms, and provides you with a better understanding of what they are trying to convey.


If your daughter tells you she doesn’t like your cooking, urge her to clarify. Try saying, “Ashley, I’m sorry you are unhappy with my cooking. What particular dishes do you dislike?”
If your co-worker praises your presentation, you can say, “Thanks for your feedback, Joe. What did you think I did particularly well? How can I improve?”

, Understand that feedback is usually about actions and behaviors, rather than the individual. Just because your boss sent you two hours of revisions on your last writing assignment doesn’t mean you are a poor writer. It just means there is room for improvement.


Try to separate yourself as an individual from the critique of your work.
Do not respond immediately.
Don’t get defensive.
Ask questions.
Don’t take it personally.
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