Is anyone else here on FJ's side? It's like what we talk about everyday on this subreddit. There is nothing unethical about copyright infringement. If anything, Inman should feel grateful people like his content.


I want to go and throw all of these fucking kids into a wall and scream at them. Fuck.


Uh no, the dude is always a dude. He never stopped being a dude after he cut his dick off.

>Nope, when a Man gets a sex change and he commits a serious crime. Guess which prison he goes to?

>He goes to a mans prison. Why? Because, hes a Man.

>Do some research, you dolts.


JEREMY WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU GET ERECTIONS FROM YOUR MEDICATION


DLC cars and points for unlocks?

 Simple solutions; Like the game? Get the car packs for a little extra hooning about. Not needed for anything.

Play the game? Good, you don't need booster packs.

They released *tracks for free.*

Pretty tame if you ask me, compared to other games.


Jokes I can handle.

Nazi puns are totally out of mein kampfort zone.


upvote for the man city badge


That manager should have KNOWN that was coming.


Downvotes are the new upvotes, didn't you get the memo?


You are literally going to get murdered... delete this whole thread.


You had me til you used the C-word. Not cool.


then it was uploaded to reddit/twitter/facebook/tumblr while sitting at the table


is there a scientific reason asians have tiny dicks???

i only ask because as a well endowed white male(8.5in fully erect) i watch the azn pr0nz and see like 3in dicks and i'm like wtf??? they have sex like frogs too it's fucking weird


No Colby played football for Notre Dame.


>rolled a natural 20 and pickpocketed

Skills can't crit.


Notice how she said "My friends say I look like Emma Watson" and not "My friends think I am an exact clone of Emma Watson and I often get confused for her in the street."


It's really not that big of a deal. I made a mistake. Don't get butthurt over it, please.


My fondest memory was when my "dead body" was discovered by one of my favorite actors, Vincent Price. He said "oh dear" which made me burst out laughing.


Thanks, Captain Oblivious.


No, it was filmed in gif.


I asked her why she did it, and all she could say was that she was helping out a friend. Well her need for helping her friend might cost our relationship. And that's how I truly feel about it. Why didn't she say no and that she has a boyfriend.


Like Emma Stone talking about her "complete lack of allure" in Easy A. Gimme a break.


that's under -120 diggs, damn

edit: You're all dickheads


Mother fuck! How did I miss that. Now my mind is blown!


Stop triggering my friends sisterofblackvisions!

I'm glad you made it through this dark time melteddadi. PM me if you need someone to talk to.


You're all fucked up.


Yeah, cos having a different musical opinion than you is just disgusting isn't it?


He said "I was not seriously injured. I've faced knives and guns and of course fists. I've had to physically fight upon occasion, but that is not my first resort. I did not carry any weapons to my interviews. On one occasion, it was only one Klansman who attacked me. On another, it was 3 of them. I won, both physically on the street and legally in court."


If you le think about le it, that's one of le most, if not LE most, le bad ass way to le die.


"Uh-huh. Yeah. This guy's heart isn't working."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"


People are expected to pull their punches and coddle those who are young and beautiful.

... for some ridiculous reason.


I think this was a joke.


I like how he blames not training,jetlag and reddit for Na'Vi performances.

Easy,start training,come to the tournament early so you're not Jetlagged,and stop reading reddit,voila,you should win TI now.


She'll be a lot more reasonable at her next wedding.


They are laughing at a cartoon depiction of a stuttering boy.  Pretty stupid.


Not even Directing and Writing for Gone Girl, very surprising.


Shhh lil one.. Go protest the church and make yourself feel better


Wait, all of that happened just because you were a dude babysitter?  WTF Granny.


then sorry, but if you added me, I would auto ignore and block you, and if your were the third person that day, I would also report you for phishing, if your profile was private of course


You mean we don't use only 10% of our brains?


I never said the actual episode wasn't enjoyable, I actively watch Warehouse 13 and saw it when it aired.  The problem is that a minor correlation between TV show universes is not that spectacular.  This is not a revelation, in fact this is a picture of actors, acting as characters in a tv show.

edit: extra "is"


Boobs is a very important aspect of a woman, it attracts males like confidence attracts females.


>I ~~feel like~~ Monty Python isn't referenced enough in gifs.

think


Sociopath here. POUND SAND HIS FACE!


It's normal. Most teenagers I know have done it at some point. Myself included.


The US is Canada's cheating, abusive, controlling boyfriend that Canada is afraid to leave.

"You were talking to Cuba again weren't you, you WHORE?! I told you to stay away from him!"


Maybe she was an asshole, but you clearly aren't very accepting of her gender identity.  You still refer to her as your "brother" and "he," and you are calling her names years later.

Leaving was probably for the best; home doesn't sound like a very supportive environment.


God I hope she doesn't breed.


Why not? Security isn't a bad thing.

Edit: I really don't like the current TSA at all. I don't think that they provide and real security. But I'm not against having good security (which I'm not saying that we have ). I agree with most of the comments below mine.


I just pictured this swelling romantic music playing over that scene and you two trying to be all passionate but getting walloped by waves.


This is an overreaction. There's no way that a single rule will make that huge of a difference in community. I'm of the opinion that the intrinsic act of posting and voting in a subreddit called /r/kerbalspaceprogram is enough of a restriction. If the post is irrelevant or unrelated just down vote it.


"Look, I'm telling the truth. It's not my fault you don't know how to."


rofl, you cant possibly believe that, in the context of posting comments on reddit


I'm so alpha I don't mind the downvotes from calling you both gay.


By magnificent bastard, do you mean drunk-driving non-contributor to society?


Placebo is one helluva drug.


Yep , can confirm , op's mum , has a stargate vag , she pm'd it to me


There were a lot of smiles, and red faces...which was made a little worse than it should have because one of my co-workers decided to make a little crack about how I was old enough to be her father.


Her music *is* perfectly awful, yeah.

It's like the perfect piece of dog shit.


It's fucking fantastic, I've been to like...nine weddings (at 21 now, and there's four scheduled for this spring) and the potluck ones are always the best.

Free liquor is also awesome, but it's obviously a different kind of fun.


hahaha americunts downvoting me. patriotism before thinking! way to go!


Hi. Thanks for reading it! I am very grateful that you thought so highly of it.

-The author of Looking for Alaska


That must be the last 'funny' variety of the let's hand it to bm comment. Let's stop.


When Kanye sneezes:

*"Bless me."
"Thank me."
"I'm welcome."*


yeah because EG definitely isn't the most professional team in e-sports

/sarcasm


Guys, we knead to cut this out.


98% of pigs have dirt-colored skin


> "Oh shit boys, I got me a big one!"

- Business-Socks

http://i.imgur.com/1OJ7p6W.gifv

edit: thanks for the gold!


Actually, HiRez cares if you get reported for hacking/exploiting/etc. Not because I play the game in a way you dislike.


Oh & Happy 18th Birthday Alex! Excelsior!


oops. Still, what's crazy about wanting money?


And then we're gonna frame you for MURDER and you're gonna go to jail for thirty years!!


It's just a video, it's not real.

I've never heard of this singer and hope to never see his name grace the front of r/videos again.


I heard this when i was in university, my immediate thought was "suck off a copper to avoid arrest?"
(Uk penny:copper plated steel, copper:police)

So i guess it can work!


&#3232;\_&#3232; stop dat lol.


It's night here in Australia, I'm not getting to sleep anytime soon.


ugh, linking to a podcast isn't answering a question :(


... not to mention the red, itchy spots on your dick!


And you know they can fail. Isn't the risk you take when you have sex? You knew the risk, then took it. No one forcing you to do anything.


Fox news- Breaking news, Obama throwing gang signs to young boy.


For a while it was not implemented. But it was implemented for a good while anyways. "Other way around" has no real meaning in this context.

As for karma, I have yet to burn 8-9k on this acc before I start caring about it. :)


Suddenly all my orgasms from good old fashioned hetero sex seem so pedestrian.


awwwww..... It almost makes you forget about his "old" girlfriend who he got pregnant and then he dumped her and pretended the child didn't exist for years. Meanwhile he lived it up in wealth while they suffered in poverty awwww, so cute...

The man is a fucking douche


That was outlawed at Geneva.


Absolutely, I'm simply saying that some men (most?) think wifing up someone else's long term fucktoy is disgusting.


"Jesus Christ, Marie."


Others are wrong.

or will just settle for whatever they're given and like it like the sheep-like consumer zombies that they are.

some people have standards and would rather wait for quality.


I posted the picture on facebook and now someone else is pretending to be me.

I dont mind that he posted it, but I am not ok with him pretending he is me.


Is this really the time or the place for such a comment?


I found a bottle of ranch at the grocery store that had the hot sauce already mixed in. The deliciousness was unbearable. Unfortunately, they stopped making it.

Now I have to mix it myself, like a peasant.


LOOK MOMMYYY ITS ANODER SHITTY MEME FWOM DIS SUBWEDDIT!!!!!!!! GOOD JOB R/ADVICEANMALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOO GOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Same rule as guys though.  If the girl is hot, then the situation is hot.  If the girl is ugly, then that is fucking creepy.  Rule of thumb, do not be unattractive.


The most impressive part was the girl in purple getting off the ground.


THESE BEATS ARE DOPE


Imagine Yao killing a spider with fire. Now imagine this face while he's planting zombie-killing plants. I rest my case.


be grateful. he gave you the opportunity for top comment!


Came here to say this, left satisfied.


To which they will reply with a how-to guide on returning from orbit by Scott Manley.


I don't think she is sure of what to do. She is just scared and nervous and acting out of fear. If she had the child I am sure she would warm up and love the baby. I know I would. Even a worst case situation where for whatever reason she resents an innocent child is better than an abortion. I realize my opinion on abortion isn't valued here so y'all may disagree.


I was very confused as to why your boss mentioned schizophrenics before the advice, until I realized my derpiness.


you must be fucking retarded.... that was a fucking FEMALE that said that you fucking idiot. let me guess.... u r a x-tian too arent you?


Hey Rithe :) On what?


Browse Reddit all day, just like the rest of us.


I don't do that. I've never believe in karma. This backs that up.


Growing up my parents owned a jewelery store "Whitenight's Fine Jewelers", which i have worked at doing repairs for roughly 5 years. There is no structural benefit of using lower karat gold in repairs, only cost benefits. Personally at our store we use the same Karat gold as the customers piece, but it is not illegal to use lower karat gold for soldering purposes


yeah - but he writes in his spare time only. his main occupation is making lolwebsites. and making websites is rocket science ...


How the fuck do you manage to get ticks on your ballsack?!


They are "normal", they're utilizing their copyright. Rom Hacks are illegal, plain and simple


Everything is awesome except for the fact that you told your girlfriend your best friend was gay so she wouldn't try anything. Was that...was that really necessary?


Get out of here and don't come back until you've spent weeks on end in a therapist's office. You're going to end up there anyway. You need help and blaming the world's problems on God is just a convenient way for you to avoid dealing with your severe personality disorder. You aren't welcome here or doing yourself or anyone else any good.


The difference was, back then songwriters at least got credit. Nowadays, it is only the singers who do, and if you find out they write their songs its like a special bonus.


Holy shit it must be so awesome being white and having so much money and free time from all your inherited privilege.


As opposed to prepaid HIV?


There's a reason no cause has ever, or will ever, been advanced in the comics. Darabont fucked up and clinging to "the virus" seriously detracts from the enjoyment.

Stop looking for reasons for everything, there's no reason for dead bodies to come back to life. All you're doing is robbing yourself from appreciating the metaphor that Romero created originally.


My knowledge of cats range from: cat or lion


Stalin.

That's why athiesm is stupid.

/yourlogic


Totally trying this.

Edit: Sweet Gentle Jesus that is the most karma I have ever seen myself get in one post. I was dropping a deuce when I found this out. So I literally shit myself.


Indeed it is.

But it is far too much pubic hair. It just shows she is lazy and doesn't have a sex partner.

You shave - right?


This comment is about how stupid that is.

That is stupid.

In conclusion, this comment was about how stupid that is.


Downvoted to ruin your 100% upvote status.

*Jesus died for your sins.


It's between this one and "The Fight" where everyone is drinking snake juice.


Ching chong ling long


A post that's men positive? on reddit? have a +1 for giving me some hope


"The three remaining nations have been locked in an eternal death struggle for almost 2000 years. Peace seems to be impossible." But doesn't OP see? War is Peace.


Wow.....no one knows how to ruin a joke like a socially awkward redditor.....who cares if it was truly random, its a funny circumstance to think about. Take of your monocle, Poindexter, and have a laugh.


I'd stab him too, Blinker. I'd stab him too...


Or the third or fourth...depends on if I'm on /b or not. I always seem to get horny from those random webm's ;)


One day, mankind will hit a point where virtually every sentence has been said at least once (except obviously ridiculous or illogical ones), on the Internet, in novels, fan fiction, tv shows, etc. By what metric will plagiarism be measured then, I wonder?


its a good thing the damn phlog isnt  on the list. Dont want to give that waste of a weapon Any attentionn


When I say "The Imitation", you say "Game!"


Oh okay. Is the  Grandma of a friend on Facebook. It popped up on my feed this morning. I think her comment was not meant in the way I've taken it lol


He was old, though not that old - 60s, I think?

I decided practice wasn't for me, so when I finished my degree I became a journalist instead. I now work as an editor on a medical journal.


That's how I feel.  That movie was fucking terrible.


Bruce Campbell: Untouched by the horrors of the modern world.


Samsung gains huge success copying the iPhone.

Apple sues Samsung.

Samsung makes ugly phones that don't look like iPhones.

Samsung's sales falter

Samsung copies Apple with new Gs6 and Gs6 Edge

Success to follow?


Try sending a letter to a local college with a mechanics program. I bet some students might work with you.


> Nice fucking try, Anna.


Grammar is spelled g-r-a-m-m-**e**-r.


Fuck off, that's fucking hilarious.


He did the same thing before he fingered my mother and I had the same reaction.


>So long, and thanks for all the fish.


I never said or implied that either.  I said you're white-knighting, which you are.  This is about you trying to get girls to like you on the internet for no reason but you being afraid to approach them in real life.  Hello King of the Friend Zone.


Congratulations, I can now add sleep to the list of things that can potentially harm my balls.


The bumpersticker or the comic?


Manager's rebuttal: Allowing you to eat incorrectly-prepared food might encourage cooks to *purposefully* make certain meals wrong.

Not that I'm personally against eating food that will surely be thrown out. I'm all for it.


I'm not implying anything, I'm flat out saying it: Yes, social norms and conformity are important, if not vital, the stability of societies. Humiliation and mocking are important tools for a society to discourage potentially disruptive behavior.


They bite you trying to hold on.  I guess in the same way they form the raft.


Just fyi, this is a common mistake.  Actually, a light year is a unit of time, not distance.  It's the amount of time that it takes light to travel the distance that it can travel in one year.

Lots of people get this wrong though, so don't feel bad.


The police have gone to check it out. No one there says they are being held against their will. They've asked.

...

Cults. Not even once.


I'd like to see you cum over me and make here.


Damn this AMA is sketchy.


Well considering the milky way isn't visual in optical light is quite hard to see unless you somehow can see in infrared or other wavelengths


This all the way, when your done finish off with something like "I have never heard anyone complain"


I do it every day....  I'm fucking hilarious!


The whole song and dance of his funeral was specifically so that his body WOULDN'T be found, to the point that a tract of the country was considered forbidden for a long time. Doubt the Mongols would want him unearthed.


Do you ever shut the fuck up?


I think you mean "me llamo Pablo". "Me amo Pablo" means "I love Pablo".

Edit: Okay, I get that the grammar is shitty. That still doesn't change the meaning of the word.


Then why is the game produced by Jagex, and called Runescape3?(not EOC). You guys are freaking hilarious. The attitude towards of RS3 on this sub is disgusting, you even went as far as disturbing a RS3 charity stream yesterday.


That just makes good sense. I hate massive waste , especially food .


Excuse me, no joking allowed on the internet. It's really serious business.

Edit: Well jeez, excuse me for joking.

Edit 2: Wow, thanks for the gold!!!!!


In India the cattle raise people. Praise the cattle!


Upvote for truth, she'd obviously be very attractive if she lost the weight.


*sigh* I need to get good at a game first.


fuck your a fag. how can u tell someon else wat to do with there life? she has ill, he cant leaev here.


Elbow grease. These guys must think I'm an idiot.

Just wait until I come back with that headlight fluid!


Don't dehumanize this woman just because she is old. If she has a stupid opinion, you fucking downvote her.


yeah didn't the crew spend like a whole year trying to find that goddamn snow leopard and the camera men cried when they finally saw it?


Why the fuck is this important to share? Do you think It's something people want to know? Sure we know it happens but fuck dude. Way to be a fucking buzz kill.


Here is some info from a comment below: [link](http://ywmv.net/?p=11483).

The guy was a baseball coach and the kid 9 years old. He literally stalked his victim for weeks before he found an opportunity to attack. He deserved every bit of that carving and then some.


came here to say that! lol


I like this one better than the other one


It might be your fault.

Get over it anyhow. We are not all keepers for the all.


Uh... I suddenly need to try this.

BTW, I eat salted pop-corn with M&Ms at the movie theater. Delicious!

**EDIT:** After many delicious "try this" and "try that" replies, I have to add that I'm European and most of the times I have no idea about that edible thing you're talking about. :)


Completely fucking irrelevant.  Do you know what a straw man is, little nigger?  Because that's the argument your using.


My wife has celiac.  We took some gluten free bread and some other bread to feed some ducks.  The ducks would not eat the GF bread.  Neither will I for that matter.

Edit: I get it! Ducks can't eat bread. Fuck off.


I used to be good with percentages, but then I took an arrow to the knee!


Shitty_Watercolour is less depressing


Is it because he's black, or fights for the rights of black people, that you refuse to support social justice for african-Americans?

There's a word to describe that type of person, and it isn't a very kind one.


AMA Request: a lucky bastard with Google Fiber's 1Gbps


If you're vaccinated,  why the hell are you worried?  You're safe? ...aren't you?


Yes. I get Brasilian waxes, but it always seems like whenever I'm silky smooth and primed for action, *no one* wants to fuck me. Yet when I'm rocking a national forest like bush, everyone is all about my pussy.

And its pretty fucking expensive to get waxed all the time if I'm not getting maximum hot sex mileage out of my porn star vajayjay.


I thought Merkel was Hitlers daughter??!

Edit: guess I should have added a /s

I do not believe this,  I just thought it was the most common conspiracy when it comes to Merkel


"A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly.... if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.

-Roald Dahl"

-FartJunior


Well aren't you just a little smarty-pants.


"Everything I do is manly because I am a man." - Paraphrased Ron Swanson


It's clear that there is a lot of rabid fanboyism going on here. Fanboys over someone doing something completely mindless. So sad.


You know what you do really well? Shooting at a brick thrower in the middle of a residential neighborhood.


That's pretty fucking stupid. Darwin awards all around. Or should I say LeDarwin?


Steve's photo with "Turn right, Steve" at an intersection where they normally turn right.

I think the single instruction, something they were going to do anyway, would be really odd. They'd be looking for more instructions constantly.


Oh right, so Vince is a faggot then. But fuck that homophobic piece of shit DeMott, right?! He said naughty things to m'ladies Bayley and AJ!


31, divorced, living also with the parents here.  We should start a club or something.  We'll have to keep it down though, my dad is sleeping.

edit: Join the club over at /r/divorcedwithparents!


Both are overblown.

The former is completely historically inaccurate.

The latter is just a joke on reddit by the college student's that have nothing better to do.


Dude, she wore a tie. Loosely. **So Punk**


Truly a shitty show. You're not missing much


Really, though. Showering and gaming are not mutually exclusive.

I game and I'm also a fashion student. I like looking good. It makes me happy. If that makes me a slut, then I will gladly be a slut.

Unless the intended message is that sluts eat controllers. I've never done that.

*edit for grammar*


Ignore the trolls/white knights/manginas.  You did the right thing.  A whore makes for a bad mother.


M4W Greyhound bus

Me: Creppy neckbeard alternating between fidgeting with my phone incessantly and memorizing every pore on your face. I didn't say anything to you the whole 5 hour ride, you're welcome.

You: Wearing a shirt with a universally used social media website, so we have something vague in common.

Can I have your number?


No, I have no reason to.

Especially not now.


yes, I recognize some of these words


So because he resists creature comforts he's a "truer" man?

**Edit:** Really? -42? I'm not complaining about losing my precious internet points, I'm just shocked that so many people think that taking the bus instead of driving yourself to work in a Kia makes you a better person.


This discussion can only go south from here.

Edit: Oh come on. /u/benfromtoledo completely set me up for that. Throw some karma their way.


SEE IF YOU CAN FIND AN "I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST SCREAM" REFERENCE IN YOUR MOM'S KNICKERS

(HINT: SHE'S GOT A MASSIVE APE DICK)


"Took me by the hand, made me a man, that one night..."


"Hey Paul, can your children sleep in my bed tonight?"
"Haha, sure Michael. As long as I get to cut your dick off first".


yeah i wanted to melt into the chair i was sitting in. they thought i masturbated in the shower. fuck no i do that in the comfort of my warm cozy bed.


\>mfw Redditards don't get it

This is why you don't post 4chan on Reddit.


Exactly. I thought the article was dellusional when it said that it was beyond the power of US agencies to take down the Twitter accounts. They're allowing them to stay up for a reason.


NO 10/10 WUOLD UR MOM FAGGET AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA


in front of her child too.  The nerve of some people.


Except that the cat's owner looks like hippy pot smoking scum.  No seriously, look at the pics.  That cat probably killed itself.  I would if I had to live around that.  Raintheory needs to play follow the leader with his abused cat.


He didn't feel like sharing that information


All aboard! Next stop : Karma hell! CHOO CHOO!


He gang bangs his English teacher and can't even construct a proper sentence. Guess someone wasn't paying attention during the three way.


I'm sure he does, after the rounds of wincest.


Could be worse, could be Michael Bay


I once got an arrow in the knee by a sniper spray.


Most of us are students who make ~~and learn~~ nothing


Yes, because while a man can jump on the assailant almost instantly, the womenfolk's brains only just have time to start coming to some realizations, and this is due to the fact that they have to put aside thoughts of, for the matronly, thoughts of their dear children, or, for the unfortunate woman who is still single, the color of her lip stick.


I got a nokia on a rope.


>It is amazing how different my experience was as a white guy.

True but I have seen this as well

Idiot #1 - Oh sorry officer I really didnt know. Yes sir I will pour that right out. Again very sorry.

Idiot #2 - Why the fuck your pig ass hassling me MAN sheeeit- get the fuck off my nuts. Why are you arresting me I didnt do nuffin (struggles)


You just confirmed your wife wasn't a dude. Congrats!!!


you are a fucking nigger for downvoting those that simply point out that this is a repost. GO FUCK YOURSELF *FAP FAP*


My favourite, God is fine; damn is fine; combining the two means God has to be bleeped


"You mean just the same as the rest of us?"

um, not really no. Not all of us. I'm not sure what you mean by that tbh :S


He is, she is very attractive.


Haha, you're that guy I've given a bunch of karma to!


FUCK. For those who don't know, Cabu is one of the most important satirical cartoonist in France. He was the most peaceful guy you could meet. Fuck them

I don't have words strong enough

also, here's the last twitter pic from Charlie Hebdo:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B6vY6mDIAAEI5k1.jpg:large

"cheers"


Right through the jeans? Guy must have had a dick of steel. No wonder you were dating him.


Why not just go "fuck it - let's party!" ? Weird. ._.


Also known as, "Your mum".


Hey now, no need to get hostile. I guess if i had to pick one it would be Andromeda. I could always pick that one out when I was a kid. Would really impress the scout leader when we were cuddled up together.


The one way you can get your point across is by demeaning and dehumanizing me.


Lol what was the groomsman going to do if he caught you?


Have you been to /r/nfl ?


Then you would be wise to use Google, Wikipedia, or many of the other wonderful sources on the Internet to learn the rest of them.

Answers like the parent comment are what brought many of us to Reddit in the first place, and allowed us to fall in love with it. Don't cheapen the place with a lame attempt at a meme. Also, punctuation is your friend!

EDIT: Ah, damn. I'm in /r/WTF, aren't I...


Cause he is an unattractive douchebag?


I hate asshole gym people. They hate fat people for being fat and then complain when they enter a gym to get healthy.

Upvote for standing up for what is right.

Edit: clarification: I wasn't asking for an upvote but giving the op an upvote for standing up to the meatheads.


Being from "the south", we had a remedy for mange. It was pretty common for our dogs to get it (granted, not with this severity, though)..we had a big bucket we kept full of used motor oil. Dip them down in it and it kills it. I do not, however, recommend that for him. Just a little TIL tidbit, I suppose.


The old guy's scam is probably not as bad as the scam that your employer was pulling.


Some day, Christards, you're going to understand that suppressing the truths that rattle your pathetic little delusions doesn't work unless you have the power to torture people to death. On the Internet, you don't have that power. Sucks to be you.


My friends all think I'm a computer genius but this is what I always do.


I wouldn't, this is the most unoriginal joke in the world the past few weeks everyone on tinder and tumblr uses it


> too! & now

LIAR.


> We were coworkers and he saw me as a challenge, I think. So obviously, said no every time.

#beatingthepatriarchy


Good thing you didn't drunk dial Tugboatia.


for u dumb asses who dont kno it is that that comment was deleted aftr he posted this lol. he sed CHECK the url he didnt say reed it u stupid fagots.


i worked for an employer who tried this on me. i "resigned" and filed for unemployment.. then was denied when my employer appealed.. this eventually went to the state court.. and because of this, i was able to get a copy of all the documents my employer had sent to the state. he lied to the state as to why i left. i won my case and was awarded unemployment compensation.

[edit] ohio


She certainly looks sexually mature.

Citation needed on the age.


As someone who has gotten 3 jaywalking tickets, I feel like that scene from Harold and Kumar was made for me.


I'm not your personal search engine.

That being said, I know for 100% certainty that sometime, likely sunday night or monday, I saw this image, minus the OS (So essentially just the video screen) at a higher resolution.


Or kill the rhino and use it as food; those things could feed a village.


yeah you totally had the frag if not for the mouse malfunction. \s

Also nobody cares what you had to emorage about to the other team after, cut the gif shorter


He has no idea, and neither does anyone else at work. I'm FtM and I have a beard so that tends to help.


my posts have far more votes than anyone else in this post, so i win


"let's see if we can clear this vas deferens *together*"


it was his profile picture. he was in my biology class group and we were commenting on same post. he said he was sad. I decided to be nice. he's not attractive and overweight, and I'm in a long term relationship, so no I don't want to bang him. thanks for the analysis.


I had a post that got 4 upvotes. Then it got 2 downvotes.

I was pretty shocked myself.


> Make the first move with guys. Initiate things with guys.

Nothing sadder than a desperate ugly chick.


in G+ no-one can hear you scream.


Have you never seen Kevin Smith?

EDIT: Seriously doesn't look anything like Kevin Smith. Google him. It's that easy.


It's always nice when people like that get what was coming.


U mad bro? You disowned your parents for most likely just listening to what a doctor suggested? I agree that it is an old and outdated practice that we should do away with but your anger is misdirected.


That show is so good. Loved the discount candy they bought on Halloween. "Butterthumbs"


the whole concept of her actually *WEARING* the chastity belt doesn't bother you at all though? that should be throwing red flags up all over the place


...and we're out of cake!


Actually it's quite well documented. Read Economics in one lesson.

Or take the blue pill.


I don't think that's how tl;dr works.


lol what a niggerfaggot


Where does one subscribe to Jewish people?


Absolutely. I mean, it's not even that funny. Is this the kind of behavior that Reddit approves of?

edit: Ah yes, the downvotes. I'm glad the consensus is that this passive-aggressive bullshit is the way to handle the situation.


Somehow I thought that context would help ...


Don't be obtuse you were clearly parodying my post and insulting me, if you don't have the balls to actually discuss the problem don't post about it.

Funny how when called out you backpedal. It's almost as if you're cowardly and hiding behind something


***wooosh***

that is the sound of being hit on going over your head.


You are a fucking loser.


that would be fun fo sure. but i think DOGMA, it could be real cool to see where it could go with another loophole more angels and demons and such...maybe a PISS MONSTER this time or a TEABAG monster ::)


Poke fun at fox news when it has nothing to do with the topic. So edgy. If Brian Williams said he wrote this you'd probably believe it

Edit: ahh yes. You found the conservative. Better downvote


I think it was more like he was asking for their perspective, trying to see what his son might go through growing up with divorced parents.


what he isn't... Did you even look?


wasnt that regrettable, was with a bunch of old friends from hs... had fun. its not that bad for a comedy


herp derp and dont forget the no right click LOL macfags


Always look on the briiiight side of loife


Down or up, you're still entertaining me.


I think that's pretty standard in England.


Take a close look at that picture though. At least two of those guys are closeted pedos, if I've ever seen them.


Yeah, you can kinda tell really. Some of the quotes are too funny.


fuck

i started in like the 3rd paragraph about the kiss and i was like "ok..." thinking you were a girl

then i see the word blowjob and i look up at the first line and i['m llik FUCKFUCIKFCUFKUFCK


Desktop? pffft i made a custon theme using the skin tones off her lips and inner thighs


the old reddit switcharoo right guys?? LOL


Modern day Robin Hood


Wow you know your facts!  Thanks for the input.


Goodnight stars,

Goodnight air,

Goodnight feces everywhere.


>The Cardinals were severely crippled by injuries all last year.

That's irrelevant to the notion that they were overrated, which was the case even before they were hit by the injury bug.

>Besides, how you gonna take shots without flair on?

Because the team I root for (Patriots) has nothing to do with this discussion?


> my consciousness being gone forever, eternity

This is a big one for me. I can work myself into a panic attack if I think about it for too long.


If you're a UNC fan like KennyLog-in, I will remove you as a mod.


For a moment I thought this was a reference to the number of downvotes, and I was terrified YouTube had spilled into Reddit.


You just caused yourself a world of hate and downotes sir...


There are seven billion people in the world, and choose to hate YOURSELF? I'm sure you ain't that bad!


In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. :D


I'm sorry to hear that :(

I'll see what I can do.


Lmao underrated comment here


Between Barack and a hard place.


I don't think pimp means what you think it means.


> LOWER ELO

> KNOW HOW TO KITE JUNGLE CREEPS


At least he got the double tap.


He covered the bodies with sailors?


Thank you for correcting me token black SRDer, but I don't think America really does have anything like Japans public baths. It's for all ages and whatnot. The point is they don't see sexuality as sensitively as we do. See: Censored genitals.


It would have been a much slower odyssey of Echo's self-creation and liberation, peppered with astonishing perversions.


Atheists can't have respect for Christians? Whaaa?


If someone wants to sit there and watch me stare blankly at reddit for hours... All the power to them.


Great pic and really great title idea.  But leave out the media-hype wind chill unless the perps were naked.


33 upvotes, no downvotes.

EVERYONE CAN RELATE.


You're right about than but wrong about its. It's is possessive, as in that belongs to it. But its = it is.


Did you see him entering the tunnel? Fans were screaming at him and booing him. Denver fans fucking suck. No way that would ever happen in Indy.


As a woman who lost 50 lbs and went from a size 14-4: FUCK YOU.

You don't know what someone else's shit is about.  It's not that easy for everyone.  And you have your own shit too, guaranteed.


So I read a story on reddit a couple months ago about a lady that ordered dominos delivery every day for 3 months. When she didn't order a pizza one day the delivery driver went to her house to check on her and found that she had fallen and couldn't get to the phone. Saved her life.

Moral of the story: buy pizza every day.


Just wanted to take a second to let you know I have you tagged as budget bondage master. Don't know why, but take it for what it's worth.


Enjoy your new top comment.


Why would you dislike TSM? Every person of TSM is very likable.


She should be applauded for her entrepreneurship.


"My meme" -- no, it's EVERYONE's meme. You're just the conduit through which the ... aw, fuggit.


Chipotle is nice, but if you're in California or a state with a high Hispanic population like Georgia or Texas, go to one of the little food carts where the vendor doesn't even speak English, that is the best Mexican food you can get in America.


I think WW2 was "population control party", or some form of project where governments made talks to complete this project. They actually weren't against each other.


**Schroedinger's Boner**


Perhaps, but I have no interest in even really being nice in this situation anymore...

Like I said, all the vitriol has ruined the experience.


Dude, your mom stole your iPod.


Some arrogant middle school cunt that shows off his skills that his rich parents paid for. I wouldn't be too excited watching it either.


Walt: "I'm out."
Skyler: "We're done when I say we're done.


Brave_Ismella... u r d bravest antiSRSer


This thread got me right in the feels.


Exactly. The whole rating thing they use makes me want to kill myself. Nobody gives a fuck. They need to keep to themselves and make threads so they can all tell each other how high they are. It needs to not leak into the untainted parts of reddit. It's like never getting to actually leave high school when I see that stuff.


That's not irony, that's history.


You're a loser.  You'd hate your *brother* just because of some girl?  You think she's a whore because she has a serious problem she wants to seek help for?

Maybe you're just an idiot.


What a horrible, disgusting fact that we all know


Taking a guess: OP are you a woman? I don't think a man will ever give the advice to dress comfortably.


Wow. Banned from an entire country. That's something to tell the grandkids.


so?  I can't smoke pot, I can't "come out" as an atheist IRL, I am restricted in hundreds of ways.  I can't live my life the way I please, either.  But the system which restricts my choices is apparently okay, whereas theirs is not.  Fuck that hypocrisy.


Yeah, in every scene he "single-handedly" defeats the attacker...


Also... Telomeres. #biology #dontaskmetoexplain #itsbeenawhile


You should have fingered her then slapped in the face over and over yelling "VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA!" it would have been so romantic.


So many other people have done so I will too!

*Bad* **Karma Train**

***Chugga Chugga***


*Absorb their powers*


Some of us didn't have a choice in the matter, so it's a shitty generalization to say that we're all weird. I used to beg my parents to let me go to public school.


This is my favorite.  The moment of terror before the sinking feeling of idiocy, priceless.


"I can honestly say I do not understand the difference."
Right, that was my point. Trust me, I didn't think you were being disingenuous, it's painfully clear that you actually don't understand it.


What a year it would be if we got weed legalized and glitter banned.


Circumcision is good for men because it helps them control their already out of control sexual urges. In countries where males are circumcised the amount of male on female rape is considerably lower.


That plan is a lot simpler and probably still ends up with sex


It does, sadly. I remember seeing those usernames all the fucking time when I was a 9fag.


> Can you still fart correctly

It comes out like a longing sigh.

**EDIT**: You guys have made my day. It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside knowing that so many people found this so funny... so warm and fuzzy, in fact, that I might need a doctor's assistance to get it all out. Thanks, everyone.


This is r/atheism, get the fuck out of here. We don't believe in ghosts and magic here and we take it *very* seriously. No buddhists allowed.


"Trapp-ed In Redd-it"


Fuck u bitch! Fuck u! I hope u get raped tonight!


Chance that it's staged: 100%.

"Player 2 played...." indicates that all moves were made on the same phone via the pass-and-play game option.


Having to attack to settle an argument, good for you. Not everyone here knows what's going on in America. I said 'how'.

Can't most people in America speak Spanish? Good job. I bet your great great uncle visited Barca once and you became a fan for life because of that right?


The worst part is that you never know exactly when the next word is coming. You could be in the middle of a wedding procession and she could burst out with "Mortified!"


Sure, youre free to do what you want. It just goes to show what kind of person you and the rest of the hivemind are.

Everyone knows theres more pieces of shit on the internet than pieces of gold. Thankfully I found the helpful folks.

You really dont see how sad you sound here btw.


An optimist would say those rotors are still half full


This isn't funny but what is is a comedian who puts themselves on a reddit meme
Lol someone really likes there own feminists materiel


Your dad is a good man.


There's definitely a ton more votes in here than the tiny handful there were just a few hours ago.


DING DING DING! tell him what hes won johnny!


I wouldn't mind jacking off a girl with a penis


Kobe doesn't abide to your humanly rules.


A walaalahooda google turjumaan?


Same guy, 3 marriages


I did nazi that coming.


it's true people, he used bullet points, and is probably wearing a lab coat.


In my hood, he woulda been left stankin' long time ago.


Shampoo is a pain you will never forget.


We need 8 more pitbulls as much as we need 8 more idiots like you.


I WANTED TO SEE SOME TITS!!!


>Try being 5'3". The dating part of this video does not do justice to how difficult it really can be.

>Try being 160.02cm. The dating part of this video does not do justice to how difficult it really can be.

FTFY, ignorant fuck.


I get really pissed off whenever I volunteer at the Food Bank, people use the donation collections as a way to get rid of their expired food and feel good about themselves.


Irrelevant.

Coffee is hot, and is known to be hot.

If you spill it on yourself, you should expect to burn.

That is like me dropping a flaming torch on myself and complaining I burned.


The only exception would be John F. Kennedy, except his wealth was owned collectively by his family, so he didn't have personal control over it. Otherwise I totally agree with you.


nice, I hope i'm not around when you snap and start stalking through your workplace with a high powered rifle you pathetic bitch


Your wife sounds like the perfect woman. Is she available?


Relevant appropriate username there buddy


http://i.imgur.com/Z9j60.gif

Made by [u/GeneralBS](http://www.reddit.com/user/GeneralBS)


Wow... Washington Post++!


That's when you wake them up at midnight on your off days and go "WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING, I MADE BRUNCH!"


More like blatant misogyny but okay


Why would anyone ever follow through with this


"Ready for the downvotes, but I think breathing is underrated"


Oh don't worry, I am that size.


You don't know anything you intollerant Christian. I am a gay black atheist jew and was a victim of Hitler upboats to the left plox


    ಠ_ಠ - i almost went outside today. that's some bullshit.
    <|>
    /ω\


I like how people get downvoted for pointing out how emaciated that girl is. u cant curb the lust for them 12 yearold bodies.


I was going to say. This kind of line is someone either attempting to create a personality from nothing OR to severely downplay a whole lot of "personality."


protip: dont fucking make a name that is gender specific and don't use voice. plenty of people use text still. don't cry like a fucking bitch when the world doesn't go your way. just fix the problem and shut the fuck up. it's all too easy.


TIL regret is not an effective contraceptive.


your mom has it all covered.


Damn, so that's who took LaserWolfTurbo88.


As someone who is intimately involved with these issues, I am extremely offended by the attitudes expressed in this discussion.

There is never an easy or natural method of opposing bigotry. It takes decades of education and waiting for bigoted generations to die off.


The important thing is that you don't die


Already said it.

I'm *better.*

I don't need religion because I do not fear death.


When asked further questions, he replies with the full navy seal copypasta that he's memorized by heart all in the name of moot.


I hope so, le picture is pretty funny


"More fists in her than a Jackie Chan movie."


They aren't even in the top 8 in world h4h4.


I think this reflects rather well on your dad. He's clearly a good enough gynaecologist that your friends feel comfortable with him as a doctor even though he's your dad. I'd be proud if I were you.


Did you nominate it? Why are you telling us? Do you approve of it?

"So, I just nominated this CL ad, that is all. I approve of this, le le le le le le le le le le".


In the Greek ancient Olympics, an erection would actually give you a huge advantage in a tight sprint.


Huh!? No way, today JUN 27 2012 is my cakeday too! What a coincidence! 'Upboats' if u agree :)

Awww why it seems i only have a day left on my reddit gold... :( this my put a damper on my situation ;(


As a girl, I feel like spitting it out isn't any better. I suppose then you don't have the horrible taste down the back of your throat, which sometimes happens, but meh. I just swallow and get it over with. Plus it's pretty hot.


You're still going to hell.


> and his son was in my sisters

All of them? At the same time?


This cake is tacky and ugly.


oh shit you even logged in to tell me how to live


The Googles, they do nothing!


You, telling me, "welcome to the internet." If you only knew. Also, to all of the people downvoting my comment, after it's already reached -15, no, -10: Kill yourselves. You are what is wrong with this world.


You can't spell pyrrhic victory without victory


What about his 'service' are you thankful for?


I meant physically directing him.  He may enjoy you taking charge of your pleasure.


I find it difficult to understand how anyone can be so hateful. I love all Asians.

Edit: Why the downvotes? Racist.


Gotta sneak up on em real quiet and build a house around em.


Upboat for the Archer reference


I wasn't on a toilet :(


Your name is awesome.

Edit: Cool, people are downvoting me because I find his name amusing.


Guess again! The first mobile game with Mario in it was [this](http://i.imgur.com/pOyEnuF.jpg). Or, if you don't count Donkey Kong as a Mario game, there's [this](http://i.imgur.com/Dq2j3zH.jpg).


In all the wrong ways.  It's more offensive than adorable.


goood. let the hate flow through you!


I don't think you understand. This girl presumably passed out in his bed, after taking her own pants off and calling the host "mike". He was a good guy about it and slept on the couch.

Edit: I do see the user name is innocent kevin so that could make things a bit awkward.


I seem to recall it having something to with with the Astrodome in Houston, Texas.

Possibly due to it being used there first.


There are parts of the country with very very little law and order.

So while its sad that a suspect had to die, I'm rather happy that this could set a kinda of fear in rapists.. Knowing the law cannot save them... That raping a woman will get them killed.


Your co-worker sounds awesome.


sorry little baby but i would leave whenever i want. cowards gossip behind your back because they are too afraid to back it up.


I'm picturing me trying this. Tell mommy "you're pretty". Then, "mommy, that man says I'm pretty".


I think this one is alot better
http://i.imgur.com/kC6jk.jpg


I want an adult-sized Krabby Patty!


I found my sidekick,I'm looking for recruit griefers to grief server owners who break the nice and fair owner guy code or NAFOGC.Make sure he's 12 and up.


>**edit: TIL She's a Redditor.**

This is my favorite edit ever. You just can't stop doing this. You're cosmically destined to continue screwing with this girl's life.


karma whoring is going on.


Stop him? He's in Mongolia, I don't think stopping him is what they'll have in mind.


Yes, kill them for ... making an animal with no concept what it looks like look silly.


Doesn't matter had sex.


Sweety.  Why don't you just pawn the computer?  You don't know how to work it properly.  I've probably spoken to you on the phone to help you remove whatever nasty little malware you stupidly loaded onto it.

The rest of you, let this serve as a lesson.  Don't purchase technology you don't understand.  You won't get laughed at.


At the top of your list:

**YOUR DAD**


>She's lucky they were just normal, sober guys.

Yeah, they could have been bla...eh, I'll see myself out.


I find it better to do the ass shake/sideways motion that gives it the metronome smack against the thighs.


"You don't mind if we take our medicine on the lift do you?"

"Of course not" ... "So long as we can post your picture on a popular website without your permission, doing something that could get most people laid off."


You mean her converse. :P


Goddamn greedy white man &#3232;\_&#3232;


did happen and it's she ^.^


The internet must suck for you.


Why am I not surprised that the person telling me to fuck off for insulting the Deadpool fan has 'Wolverine' right in his username?

Grow up and read something that wasn't your favorite cartoon in 1995.


I'm perpetually amazed at the quantity and variety of things shoved up peoples arses.  I can't help butt wonder who looks at everyday objects and thinks, 'yes, you will fit inside me.'?


I came here and saw exactly what I expected. Doesn't matter the quality of cereal. The dyes in sugary/brightly colored cereals cause this. Has nothing to do with health. Except the fact that eating that much, in order for that to happen, isn't healthy for you. Try some Cheerios for fucks sake.


>What drove you to become a priest?

My mom in her ford. Just kidding. It was first from personal acquaintance with priests, and then a desire to serve God in that fashion (along with the knowledge that this is what He called me to).

As to proof, I could message the mods if they're interested. I've done these before, and I think people can see I'm a priest from them.


**Atheisth ARE monkeys**.. Not christians. You are the one believing that you are monkeys.


Sounds more like some sort of air pressure change.


This isn't Youtube and you are not funny.


Yes, I have! He's vacationing at the Bahamas!


You guys are morons.  It's NOT your choice.  I'm not vaccinated and never will be and neither will my kids.  And if any of you or anybody tries to force it on me or my family, you'll earn yourself a trip to the ER pretty fucking quick.

So remember, when you try to force me to vaccinate, you put your own life at risk.


It was indeed me! Have an upvote for your diligence.


So how do they go about this? Let skinny cunts go in and hurt themselves just because less than 5% of people actually know what they're doing?


Nobody in their right mind would take 24 hours worth of saliva for only one million. I would have to think for a while about a billion.

EDIT: salvia*


If they're wearing a bra it's probably a girl.


Glad you enjoyed it, I spent 30 minutes typing it instead of typing an essay.


Id rather have my kids have potty mouths than to think that being gay is OK any day of the week .  Being gay is like the most selfish thing you can do to the human species .


please don't do an AMA this should suffice.


YO DAWG, FROM SOVIET BABUSHKA DOLLS I HERD YOU LIEK **I N C E P T I O N**

Edit: Holy downvotesplosion, Batman! I guess that's what I get from poking my nose in memes :-D


"...Oh my fucking god."  Utter shock and anger, sadness, hateful, and in denial.  I didn't know how to react.  My wife and children were killed.


Perhaps you should stop being such a fucking mouth breather.


Your parents bought you both cars, how is there anything to complain about in that scenario?


I used to steal power from my neighbors because I really really didn't want to pay the bill, but then I took an arrow too the knee!


That's what he says out of Pride.
EDIT: there seems to be some confusion about my gender. I am male.


Doesn't change the fact he acted in a similar manner as Irvin. As such he should have been punished similarly.


I read that in George W. Bush's voice.


...til you've tried it.


Maybe it was Dr House.


Nice! Topical humor! Really pushing the envelope.


That is the most adorable power trip ever.


Yes, because boys want nothing more than an old guy's dick in their mouth and/or their ass.

Fucking idiot.


While holding a shotgun. The nice voice adds to the intimidation.


Now that my inbox is full and I keep getting downvoted,

To whoever is showing people my link:

**The teacher deserved it.** She was bitchy and all the kids hated her. I wouldn't have done what I did if it was a nice teacher. A nice teacher would've actually let me use the phone though.


Don't let anyone else hear this.  Reddit may like NPH more than cats. And reddit does not take kindly to bullying cats.


I doubt you do.  Anyway, I *actually do* get laid regularly, and just found this annoying.

Reddit neckbeard virgins are hilarious.     Seriously, get off the computer and step outside.   This girl ain't that hot.


My penis just retracted inside my body in fear.


wow you sound like a bitch, lighten up a bit, jesus christ


Yeah, or...at the...um...life factory.

Not the cereal Life, but like...if there was a factory that made...you know, life.

...

Sorry...


Thanks. Such subreddit exists already; it's every subreddit that's not devoted to drugs. /r/trees stoner scumbags should know to respect other redditors and existing interests boundaries and keep themselves and their vile habit to /r/trees and other similarly scummy drugs advocacy subreddits.


**I WANT 50 MORE. NOW.**


Wow. Well done. Upmods to you.

EDIT: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


What do you call a Nazi in a skirt?


Don't burst my bubble brah I'm finally heading towards reddit stardom and you burst through my make up van and tell me the shows over. I ain't going down like that.


I'd give my left nut.


Nah... she's white. No worries... they wouldn't have shot her !


"Someone please help I've clogged the toilet!"

"With shit?"

"No...with farts."


I like Red Green.. but c'mon. He's picking shitty targets.  And don't get me started on Tallguystrongmans comment.   Grow up man.  You gonna laugh at everything just cause it has a laugh track?


are you a turtle? how did the waiter have time to phone a cop to chase you down?


I used to love him, man, but then I took an arrow to the knee!


That's the *yeast* you should expect.


Being 15 doesn't make a damned difference about who he is or how good he is. Not sure why people would say "he's 15 so that's why he acts like this"

I guess arteezy is 15 then


Or anonymously buy her a dildo with a note saying "Go fuck yourself" on it.


"m'love?"  Excuse me?  Are we friends?  Are you my husband in disguise, gently caressing me via the internet with a saccharine term of endearment that he knows will make me throw up in my mouth a little?

Or do you just think cutesy little terms of endearment are a great way to be condescending to strangers on the internet?


Who's watching?

> Zamira, Jessica, Luis, Daniela, Yeny, Javier, Liliana, Rolando, Mayelin, Ernesto, Tumelo, Alberto, Oumar, Issabella, Manuel, Yamy, Marco...


If the holocaust card is not used once a while "they" will lose their upper hand.


The fact that the picture only has 7 total pixels didn't help me either.


Sure, but where they're wrong, I'm right.  Subtle but important difference.

In other news, username, Vonnegut or Joel?


You are probably every Redditor's dream girlfriend.


My quickness with insults, also makes everyone hate me. If someone upsets me, I quickly respond with faggot or some racial slur; even though, I stand for equality for all people, xbox has ruined me.


I'll look at it later


To be fair, fat people completely lack a cornerstone of logic.  "I'm fat, I should eat less to remedy this...man, I'm hungry, let's eat!"


if it happened reddit would crash for 3 hours


Didn't read the actual story, but your version made is seem lame as fuck.


"**SOMEONE NEEDS TO TAKE CARE OF THEIR D**- Oh, Hello there."


Hahahaha, Not trying to fuck her, I'm ridiculously crazy good looking so women throw themselves at me.


I sense a missed opportunity.


I give a larger percentage of my earnings to help people then an asshole who drives 1.7 million dollars around.


- Play Monopoly

Fucking impossible while drunk.

Source: The banker can't function or cheats too much (plays correctly)


wow i must have said this 10 times today....the old episodes are quite innocent!!!


When I was a kid, if I got a scrape or a bruise or anything, my dad would always grab the cleaver and ask:

"Is it bad?"

"No."

"Do I need to *amputate?*"

EDIT: TIL my dad is secretly a part of the Fathers Against Conventional Medical Practices Association.


You've got my vote for the answer with the most win.


Have you filed a claim for violent crime's victim compensation?  Most states will pay your medical bills if you were the victim of a violent crime...

I'm assuming you're in Indiana based on that news story, here's the info

http://www.in.gov/cji/2348.htm

You have 180 days from the time the crime occurred to file a claim.


normal is so boring.

she was into really kinky stuff and you missed your chance.


This [timescale](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_piXE8lFEABo/TTnz9vICTjI/AAAAAAAABLI/aYvbggczElk/s1600/aaa.jpg) might help put into perspective you the bullet you just dodged.


I used to think of nipples, but then i took an arrow to the knee!


John Cena is a fucking bro.


Yeah, but why browse /r/minecraft if you don't play anymore?


Why would he watch the episode?

That's like sticking your pecker in a George Forman grill and slowly watching it fry until there is nothing left of your manhood but the charred, overcooked remains of what used to be your dignity and sense of self-worth.

Yeah that about sums it up.


Did she say anything incorrect or misleading though? You can't just say 'they interviewed a bias person!' and pretend that strips the legitimacy of the article or the person's views. I don't like how the article classes anything containing porn as 'dark reddit' but I don't think it's be all that terrible if the admins cleaned up some of the darker subs.


Even if ISIS is eradicated, its sick ideology will live on, and similar groups will continue to emerge in the Middle East.

This is a war against an idea, not a militant group.


What is it like being a burden?


All three at the same time works for me.


>I don't think anyone really cares why you did it.

Then why do people keep saying I did it for karma, as if to make it sound worse?


The Monday after I graduated college, my mom woke me up at 8 am and said, "are you looking for a job?" -_-

Getting her off my back was the main reason I was happy when I found a job.


You are real to me....you let me talk to you.


Jerks, uh... Find a way.


Haven't kept up with her. She tried adding me on facebook a few times but I declined.


It's a complicated issue. This is how many people do food prep around the world, but in the United States it's very obviously against several health codes and regulations. At some point I think it'll need to be addressed from the cultural side.


> We didn't miss the joke.

Except every reply implying they missed the joke.


Today, your teacher, who has been biding his time all these years, waiting patiently for you to make a mistake, reads this post and finally puts that glorious F that he's been saving on your paper.


Perhaps the baby would have been better off in a hospital.


Don't forget to scratch a bunch of weird messages into the rocks


You probably would've opposed Martin Luther King Jr.'s lifelong work in civil disobedience for it inconveniencing you. Bravo.

EDIT: Downvoting? Did this statement offend you, or is it inaccurate in any way?

Calling out the hypocrites who claim to support MLK Jr. and utterly oppose what he stood for and the civil disobedience he participated in.


How do you know you only dated the one?


You're one of those “smart marks", eh?


The front of your popliteal is called the 'knee'.


This. This is the one we downvote.

Edit: There were far more downvotes than upvotes when I posted this comment.


No we weren't allowed to read Dr. Seuss books my family is religious.


Yeah, there wasn't much left.


YOU KNOW,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, FOR SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;-)


You heard it here first, 24/~


Sorry guys... i'm new to all this, its my second day and it's my first post that's done o.k so i probably did over-react to the comment... forgive me?


I am literally retarded.


Whether its serious or not; most teens do it. Maybe it's a few scratches, or maybe they need stitches, but most do it.
And if they say they haven't, they are either completely deliriously in-their-own world happy; one of the very few who haven't; or (and this is my personal favourite) lying.


I think he's handsome


Errr... In no universe is Dartmouth Ivy League.

Alright school, but WORLDS from Ive League status.

People just throw around 'Ivy League' nowadays?


My HOA had a meeting discussing the direction that we should mow our lawns so that the grass was uniform on every street. They gave me sooooo much shit over the summer for mowing it perpendicular to the direction that they wanted us to.


You mean, " not even close cause he's a cheater".

We get it. New league, new rules.


After about three months of describing all kinds of intense sexual fantasies to each other in email and over the phone, that whole platonic thing had been flung out the window.


I actually aim for cyclists on my morning commute. Fuck the lot of you.


Fine then, Portable Tesla coil and a *Jupiter* costume. Happy now?


Lol why make such a big deal i didnt even got for photoshot you know what i did that day cut school and watch 15 episodes of one piece


˙ɐɯɹɐʞ ɹoɟ ǝsol oʇ ǝɟıl ǝuo ʇnq ǝʌɐɥ ı ʇɐɥʇ ʇǝɹƃǝɹ ʎluo ı : /(. 0 ./)


If I had money, you'd have gold


I applaud you for using shift rather than lazily using caps lock.


Eh. Stealing from a 12 year old teaches him a lesson. It's not the best way, but it's the most effective.

Letting a 12 year old play CoD on the other hand is bad for him and everyone out there who plays with sound.


No, nothing sexual at all, she is just a concerned citizen giving free prostate exams.


You're an idiot, a cat couldn't take and submit a picture. I think it's more likely that the *human* in the picture is talking to us, don't you?


When people keep saying it. My wife keeps calling me dumbass.


I duno. There is something ironic about a 9,000 pound man giving a speech on taking responsibility for actions and stuff like dat.


Railroads are definitely great employment.  Locally pay is $25 for a shop helper which requires no experience.  You've got to be on point though because if you're a screw up the union will throw you under the train faster than the company.


Thanks, I'll forward your insult to them.


He looks so cooky. If he talked to me I wouldn't even listen to him.


Freddy Kruger is part of a classic horror film series that has a cult like status, and Kratos is a character from an extremely popular video game.

GWAR is a semi-obscure band that high school kids listen to to be edgy until they grow up and take off the goth makeup.


Here's the twist... the Shyamalan joke was dead the whole time!


The song itself is anti-religion.


Well, you don't need unlimited money to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin: he's broke, don't do shit.

EDIT: Thank-you, masked anonymous redditor, for the gold!


Eat shit you brainless, dickless shill of an uncle-fucking reprobate.


I think the problem with Cars 2 was that it was a sequel to Cars.


Lighten up, Francis.


The big humans seem to love that toy.


Going to prison for being gay? Fucking homophobic cops...


47 here and I can verify.  Noiw replace the word communist with muslim and you get today's great lie.


Indoctrination is never correct, even if you agree with the message being indoctrinated. Teach people how to think, not what to think!

EDIT: TIL /r/athiesm is no different to /r/christianity in that both downvote people who despise indoctrination and advocate critical thinking. Take a good hard damn look at yourselves and see you are exactly what you despise.


My car is 82 hp and it weighs 1.2 tonnes. 66 hp would be like putting a jet engine on a normal sized car.


this would work against the "pile driver" theory, and more likely proves that the core was destroyed with explosives.


Ah the good ole onesome.


Both of you are suggesting that they actually count votes instead of pick the winner ahead of time.  Fail.


Chronic masturbator here. I say POUND HAND.


So does any kid unlucky enough to scare some kook with a pistol. Neither of my victims had a chance to get at a gun or mace or anything. If someone wants to hurt you, packing heat is not going to stop them.


Well, if he wasn't Mormon, it'd be MONOPUSSY


Dude I try to not tell people they are fucking mormons on reddit, but there is a place add in reskin on there fucking website. Nots not like you need to open exe. As for your statement of it being more mod friendly all I can say is, you must be a brain dead chimp.


Much a do about nothing. SHAKESPEARE MEANT VAGINA


Calling bullshit. Any white person would have said, "white".


When life gives you lemons....


http://i.imgur.com/ip8we.jpg

Maybe NSFW


Looks like he prevented her from being...taken.


This sucks for the music store, especially so if the music store is just a music store and not a pawn shop. They lose $x on the guitar at no fault of their own.

Yes, it sucks that the guitar was stolen, but why should the store eat it?


"Niiiiccccceeee... You asshole."


***IT WAS YOUR FAULT.***


So all those times I've said, "Here's to me!" and pounded back those drinks, I was being extremely rude?


By the time I finished reading your username I was already bored of the meme

Good luck with that, tho (downvoted)


I just buy a tub of Tollhouse cookie dough and eat it by the spoonfuls, regretting it almost instantly.


I liked the part where none of what Mr. Colbert does will ever matter, thanks to the corruption of the governing body. USA! USA! USA!

Protip : he's just another part of the machinery that keeps you sheeple compliant.


....Rob?

Nah just kidding, that was pretty gay


That is very offensive.


We're bad people, aren't we


Delete the repost then.


That's why I've learned to like flavors people often don't like and give away. More yellow starburst for me.


Teaching her the pleasures of the cock would actually be better than she deserves. But leave it a blue piller to fail to grasp the concept of gratitude.


I would marry Batman. I would fuck Jesus but I can't imagine that would last very long. Virgins. But I really don't want to kill Santa so I'm backing out of the question.


i love fiction; it's my favorite genre.


I dont want the kit anymore. So either refund or Ill dispute it through paypal.


"Dying in 30 Mins! AMA!"


Division champs 7 of the past 11 years. Yeah, I guess I just don't see it. The franchise has had mostly success since Paul Allen bought them from Ken Behring. 2-3 bad seasons. Are you a new fan?


yeah sure man no problem your the boss. head honcho. big cheese.


I don't want to. He's not a good comic and he's probably terrible at Starcraft. His only audience would be those from his fans who fancy the fact that one of their celebrities is playing Starcraft.


I've never seen such disregard for safety; Astonishing!


Because what would you have done? Hid yourself in the cellar alone and left the people around you out?


Lucky you. I had someone disagree with a post I had made, went snooping in my account and I don't know how he knew or found out (probably something from the local subs I visit) but PM'd me something like "fuck you man and I know you live around ____ (nearby street)"

That account was then deleted. Creeped me the hell out big time.


>Guess what? Real scientists like to be baffled by natural phenomena.

good. then they can STFU when something like this happens, cos all it really says is they don't know fcuking shit


He goes to the attic, finds an exact replica of his own top floor, right down to the tooth brush in the bathroom.  He hears a noise, it's coming from the attic's attic.


http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/100q4p/my_younger_brother_went_to_play_at_his_friends/c69snv2

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/100q4p/my_younger_brother_went_to_play_at_his_friends/c69ukn5?context=3

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/100q4p/my_younger_brother_went_to_play_at_his_friends/c69t0sy

lulks yeh im so madd


"Fuck, man. I push buttons, I turn dials, I read numbers. Sometimes I make up little stories in my head about what the numbers mean."


dude something's wrong with the shape of your head.. you're ugly as hell


He's dead, its just that the computer has taken over.


eh pretty synonymous now a days.


How did the short story person do that? Just call up and say, "hey, ya got a minute? Going to read Winnie the Pooh for a second." It's a really sweet act to do. How could someone do this?


People (mostly incorrectly) believe that TSM spells out their initials with their ban picks. It's just projecting nonsense, just like how people make up these weird conspiracy theories about Half Life 3.

I'm sure by now though TSM is just reading reddit and playing into them and are now *actually* spelling things out.


It's so repulsing that I put near a guy who just died and his heart started beating again. I guess he was immediately repulsed.


Oh please get off your high horse. You guys pulled Lorenzo Mauldin's scholarship the day before NSD in 2011.


I used to think that hitting on women was really cool from music videos and movies growing up, until I hit puberty and saw guys flirting with my sisters everytime we went outside together. It's really uncomfortable and disturbing when you realize how easily a guy will start flirting with a girl off the bat. Not a big fan of flirtatious guys.


Welcome to Barack Obama's police state.


It is like the girl that texts you back that she is not interested. At least she had the common courtesy to give a reply.

Still hurts a little.


Katara annoys me and squirtle fits in my pocket... Win.


I don't understand why some adults refuse to even consider the possibility that a child or young adult would know something that they don't. My own mother was guilty of this... It's just dumb. I guess all we can do is try to make it easier for the next generation.


lol, *whoosh*

Edit:  I'm butt hurt by all of the downvotes.


THIS FOOD IS ON FIRE STOOPID HOOMAN


More importantly, you should have told the bitch to focus on the game, your creep spread was fine, maybe in a fun 1v1 or a 4v4 I could see having time to do this but in 2v2, seriously?


Oh man I wish I could tell this to my dog. He loves other dogs once he gets close enough to sniff, but he has to yell 'HEY! YOU! YOU THERE! DOGBOY! OI! DOGGY FOUR LEGS! OI! HEY! YOU! OI!' and it means I can't take him anywhere there's a risk of running into other dogs. Life would be awesome if he could just shut the hell up


I used to play basketball, but then I took an arrow to the knee!


After being offered my current job they said I'd need to go take a drug test... "Sooo, do you want to do that now or do you, uh... want to wait a couple weeks?"


Honestly, there's at least one of you people in every thread in this subreddit. You realize 99% of these posts are from friends and/or are just jokes/trolling, right?


Because then you're caving to a bully and losing sales as stated.


I'm glad you feel that way.


Just getting ink to refill their pens, these are accountants.


So the white, middle class, Christian males that bombed the 16th Street Baptist Church back in 1963 and killed four young girls could be summed up as the following;

Because American.

See how that logic fails to explain the complex underpinning of the situation?


Of course I remember you...well, not you, but your sister. Not sure I ultimately felt okay about that. But, hey, it's her chest.


there no reference of Meepo at all

I dunno how you got that from that


I'm fat, none of that is possible


*apologize
-also thanks.


LMAO...I don't but I will now.


Cool story bro. :)

EDIT: OK NOW I KNOW WHY EVERYONE IS SO PISSED AT ME SORRY I DON'T KNOW ALL THE MEMES PEOPLE I REALLY THOUGHT IT WAS A COOL STORY!

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/cool-story-bro


THIS JUST IN, Sa1ntB3trayus browses Reddit specifically for small penis pictures.


Perhaps that is as long as he can remember what position he took last. But that would imply he is not a wet finger politician similar to Obama. I think we know by now Obama is not a wet finger politician but a radical collectivist who deliberately spits on the Constitution while paying public homage to it. He is dishonest at best and a traitor at worst. It's not hard to believe the later.


You are a hitman in the employ of a black gansta, whose turf is being invaded by trailer park dealers?


if he prioritizes boss rush he can suceed or fail quickly, considering he's living off of youtube views long games just result in more time he has to spend for the same paycheck.  *shrug* Its just how it is.  That being said, I still dislike his videos where he concentrates on boss rush


And attacking people because you don't agree with their opinion does not make you better, smarter, or your own opinion more correct.


Throws this out there "I don't care that you're filming"

Yet he's only yelling at the guy who is filming.


It's probably because they don't make a lot of sense.


Eh, believe what you wish. You people will evidently believe anything you are told.


The Matrix, with cats...

http://i.imgur.com/9FvgJ.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/dac3n.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/LJTkl.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/cabjF.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/tHi72.jpg


Did some Googling. Until Sheamus can confirm where they got the picture (which would be super cool, wink wink), [it's a Threadless shirt that's up for votes--not currently available for sale](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0).


Bubble boy 2: Electric Bubbaloo


Teller isn't on stage.  If he were there, you would hear him.


For racially aggravated assault, apparently.  Just in case it wasn't inc-character enough already.


I used to have 3.4 million Karma, but then I took an arrow to the knee!


and not all non religious folks are openminded and polite


I'm sorry you got downvoted for the truth. have +1.


convenient that his new score only includes numbers that the other contestants had in their previous scores.


I used to be tangy and full of zip, but then I took an arrow to the knee!


Looks like a set of pistons in an internal combrostion engine.


/r/soccer sometimes leaks. I enjoy it to be honest, but I'm biased because I also like soccer.


I'm gonna check this site out really quick before I do my homework.


If he said "My doge ate a litter of newborn kittens once" instead, you could have said "Well that got dank quick."

edit: stop the downvotes, the hating on memes circlejerk has got to go


I'll bet you love a dong.


I downvoted because I think this whole Curiosity thing is seriously overhyped.


She actually got wet from him calling her baby... true story


Whën jdwpom was ë><plaining /r/spacëdicks, yës. Wë hadn't rëally talkëd until thë \/idëo thing.


"See,  if I don’t get an erection I’m called impotent. But a dry hole is the same as a flaccid penis. A dry hole is an impotent hole and you’re not a complete woman and you should be ashamed of yourself!" -Jim Jefferies


>Do you really think that a little rage over the internet means they care?

They care enough to follow me around and downvote my posts.


About a year ago my wife said in her sleep "I want to move to California so I can become a banker and wear a cool hat!"

We've been saving up ever since.


...because what any healthy relationship needs is more judgmental attitude.

As the top comment suggests, it's okay for her to make it about her needs, but trying to cast the boyfriend as immature is both plain wrong (there's no such thing as "too old" -- it's completely subjective) and it sets a bad precedent.  I wonder how many of your habits or OP's habits the boyfriend would find immature.


Yes, because all you hear about is the constant disrespect of firefighters.

I can't leave my apartment without at least 37 people yelling, "Yo, fuck firefighters."

...


Yeah, my 9th grade teacher would have gotten a visit from my parents, and a nice report to whoever was in charge of that teacher getting fired. Because small =/= illegible. I'm not going to strain myself and force myself to write bigger because you don't want to put glasses on.


Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.


Steve Martin has no right being an asshole.

He was/is not funny.

Ever.


Shot in the stomach.... WITH A FUCKING CANNON!!!!


but the poster I replied to didn't specify they had an objection with it being done every time. They seemed to object to it being done at all.


I don't need this kind of bullshit from some guy on the internet.


Middlesbrough > Cambridge

edit: haha, if you downvote me that doesn't make it any less true


The guy who owns Founders is Irish so of course we sell it!


Part of me wants to date a girl who's been with less guys than I have girls.

The girl that really loves me is amazing at sex.. so I guess you do lose that when you find somebody who hasn't had as many partners


Really really well at the moment. Thanks for asking, how's your doctorate doing at helping you?


BEEP BOOP ARE YOU NEO?


Nope, you should realize EvE is a terrible game and just start playing other games.


Final act:  There is no room 209.  OP wrote letter to self, imagined voices, apartment, etc.


If I was as short as you, I'd probably kill myself. Sorry about your predicament lil dude.


High as shit, double checking around the room to make sure they're in the right class.


Damn!
Came here to write the same. Upvote to you, sir.


Oh man, makes me wonder if we should tell kids "if you think your friends might be hurting animals, you HAVE TO TELL EVERY ADULT YOU KNOW" so maybe we can catch these utter sociopaths (psychopaths?) a little earlier.


Post it, at best it was link to our warranty that is openly noted on our site.

http://ikonrazors.com/warranty/


This is one of the few movies I love, whilst completely empathizing with people who hate it. Pretty much the definition of 'not everyone's cup of tea'.


If he sent my kid to die for 'WMD's' I would punch him in the fucking face, but yeah presidents r super kool


Sounds like a smart lady. Too bad we can't discuss her.


If everyone was 100% in it to win it, then it probably would be. Luckily nobody wants to stoop to that level.


Jesus Christ. What goes through someone's mind that makes them think that's even remotely okay?


I like Dane Cook. Sue me.

Edit: as a comedian, not as an actor.


I don't think it's petting anymore...


what are you gay? Do you even Tolkien? I bet you are a hipster, you just dont like it because many people like it, and many people who like it out of the false reasons?

Anyways, your Opinion, peace!


Today you, tomorrow me.


Can confirm. Apple fanboy here.


Must... not... make... goat fucking jokes...


It's illegal to park on lawns in KC, please see my comment above. That's why they can have the car towed. It's also tacky and as a neighbor I would probably call and report it too.


I asked for advice on Reddit once; I'm dead now.

AMA.


>Someone needs to shoot the president.

FTFY


I can't decide whether this is inspirational or sad


Just remember to keep buying things or the terrorists win.


Yeah, because reddit doesn't steal anything.... &#3232;\_&#3232;


Upside number 2: I was never again asked to do the dishes.


Being designated male at birth doesn't make you "a guy".


They haven't been airbrushed yet.


You need her for alchemy? So you have to eat her first lol


Being kicked out isn't enough. The police should be called because that's sexual assault!


Up vote for username relevance


I know a Nigerian prince who was shocked to learn that our family fortunes don't get locked in brutal civil wars.


Yeah screw people who aren't disgusting pieces of filth.


Step 1: Get a bowling ball that is slightly smaller than a soccer ball.
Step 2: Get a cheap size 5 soccer ball.
Step 3: Cut open the soccer ball, take out the guts (edit: soccer balls have bladders, that's obviously what I was referring to)
Step 4: Place bowling ball into soccer ball shell.
Step 5: ????
Step 6: Profit


Oh for christ's sake. You guys are worse than the Paulites. Go away.


Your real father was a billionaire who took a janitorial job just to be around you at school.   He also secretly changed test scores and turned in homework for you.


Have I stumbled into [redacted] by mistake?


90% fail in the first 4 years I think.

EDIT: apparently it's 60%, according to Drsmallprint and his stupid facts.


You mean, people have different opinions than yours, they stand up for their own beliefs, and that makes them stupid? How ignorant....


where is Shitty_Watercolour when we REALLY need him?!?!


Is this a joke...are you guys having a go?

Hurtful and shaming? Having strength and discipline?


Allow me to translate southern Californian into regular people talk.  Flash floods means light sprinkles.

Especially in San Diego.

And don't start with that, "but there was that one a couple years ago!"

No.  What SoCalians think is the storm of the century is known as Thursday in places like South Texas.


Thank god. I can't deal with four more years of seeing his ugly poor face on the TV.


That's not so shabby. Most people only have one girlfriend to date.


One does not simply post beautiful pictures of oneself on Reddit and get away with it.


I dunno, they don't have enough firearms and ketchup.


http://imgur.com/kiblT NSFW obviously


Diamonds aren't all that rare. De Beers is a cartel that has hoarded and stockpiled diamonds, along with a very inventive advertising campaign, to artificially inflate the cost of diamonds.  On the flip side, they buy a lot of blood diamonds and have some shady procurement practices.  Cheap overhead + high margins = big profit.  All for shiny chunks of carbon.


nope, they both became gays and got hanged for enjoying homoshexual relation in an muslim country. the end XD


Imagine when you hear one thing almost everyday and everyday for years and years.. And at some point a dude appears and say that's all you heard is a lie. They will just assume you're fucking crazy.

Our propaganda works amazingly well.


I used to be such an immature idiot that I thought seeing Ash Ketchum's hat in Metalocalypse was 'neat', but then I took an arrow too the knee!


thanks kevdeath666!  keep it real now!
"booze and ho's only!"

;-)


Less black people, you mean?


My nostrils used to be so dark and gloomy!

Now it looks like I've got a little whorehouse in there!


True, true. Let's make this game look even more ridiculous. Unicorns shitting rainbows and my little ponies are not enough. Who would want cool and serious looking skins when we can have BIKINI STITCHES. HAHA stitches with bikinis, get it guise?? lololol kawaii desuuuuuu


No.  Nobody gave two shits and farmed other areas.

Edit:  If you don't like the game, RMAH your items and quit.  It's quite simple.  I've bought plenty of games and didn't like them.  I didn't complain nonstop like this subreddit has turned into.


I bet she's naked under those clothes... Slut


You are obviously projecting as there is nothing rude in his above comment nor in the op.


Giles Corey.  Last words: More Weight.

Edit:  Good lord, 1000 karma from 6 words?  High five!


Stop this elitist bs. Typos are a part of life.


>Mr. Roddenberry started calling me the conscience of Star Trek.

Nimoy: Science officer on the show, con*science* officer irl.


No it's not, it's pandering.

We don't know the first thing about this guy yet.

For all we know his biggest role model was Che.


This will be like something out of a movie.  A bunch of stoners exploring Australia looking for a rare type of cannabis.  When they find it they have to keep themselves from smoking the whole thing before they get paid. I would love to be apart of this team


Ah, Quebec, full of mysandry and anything man hate related.


But you understand that despite the fact that you think it's unique, it's still a "CHECK OUT WHAT I PULLED" post, right?


We no can dunk. But good fundamentals. That more fun to watch.


> Who decides who matters?

me

convenient, isn't it?


It was worse than the time daft punk stole kayne's beat.


AMERICA DOES NOT HAVE A GOD DAMN FUCKING OFFICIAL LANGUAGE TEACHERS CAN TEACH IN WHATEVER LANGUAGE THEY WANT TO.

I understand it kind of sucks, but the OP specifically mentioned "speak the official language." Seriously that blows though...


You might say he's... underground.


My University has a grade challenge thing where you can take it to the department chair of you feel you're being biased against so I'm not worried about that.


Thanks, I do keep that in mind.


No.  First in foremost you should be working on the strength and flexibility of your core as well as your posture.  It doesn't matter how little body fat you have, if you have no core muscles and you have a pelvic tilt, you will not develop strong sex lines.

Also, genetics might play a part in exactly how they develop, but with training just about anybody can get them.


As a proud owner of a vuvuzela I can safely say BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

EDIT: As an avid cornet player, I can toot my horn better than any other vuvuzela tooter out there.


I'm sorry? Do you really feel that LoL deserves any type attention from WC3 Dota or Dota 2 ?


What do you get when your lotion runs out?


The BJ girl LITERALLY single-handedly erased all progress made by the feminist movement.

    GOO

D J

O*B*
, WOMEN


that I couldn't make a success of my new family and my new country


Wouldn't matter if I did. You're a comment karma panderer and you know it. Deal with it.


what, you mean that geeky kid from The Wonder Years?


Did you hear the one about the blind man carrying the Olympic torch?

He really enjoyed all the sights.


Not really strange when you realize how many kids hasidic jews pop out.

They fuck like rabbits


for something to be stolen it has to be taken away does it not? if i took a photo of a picture in your house would you consider that stealing?


I will upvote you for now, but know that if you fail us I will hunt you down  and say mean things to your mother.


Hilarious how casuals can still do good in the low skill ceiling SC2. Desrow beating Flash in SC2 lol. You would never see that iN PRO BW.


I thought it was a euphemism to not wear a condom if you are trying to reproduce.


Let me guess, you do this in your games all the time? This isn't impressive at all, right?


Yeah I don't know how I would feel if the guy I just slapped barely flinched and then applauded me for it.


Have you looked into the argument before dismissing it?


"Is this the song we like?"

"Heck yeah!"

"Let's do it, then"

*starts dancing*


Well I mean, when it takes up 4/5 of the subreddit it makes it completely null. Come on NL fanboys, downvote the fuck outta me, *I WELCOME IT WITH OPEN ARMS!*


as per usual, the rules 1.be atractive  and 2. do not be unattractive   apply


Though if you're talking about the basic decks the game provides, I have found priest is the best (probably because it's the only one with card draw)


Yeah, I have a cover letter and everything.


because the kid doesn't realize how condescending it was


The article is about people being "happier with their phones", not really just being happy people overall. But your sentiment is valid of course.


Of course the local anti-semite would come out of the woodworks.


that...that sounds horrible


> I noticed it after posting

Then you should've deleted and reposted. Downvote.


Disney mass produces "talent." Who does Britney think she is.  I really dislike her after her comment...Let's be honest, she isn't that great


Cry more you faggot, you're a fucking asshole


Nice try, mole capable of intelligent thinking.


I am the arbiter of all evaluative judgements. I win at all times. Suck a dick.


she was good at what she did and i was single.


Bullshit on benching 325. If you can put up that kind of weight, you're not going to put 3 plates and a fucking 5er on each side. "No, this 315 isn't enough. better add this little dinky bagel weight on, so I actually get a workout."


Sex is good, ~~but~~ butt sex with someone you love


No disrespect to the guy himself but isn't that basically using him as military propaganda for kids to create sympathy for the Iraq/Afghan war?


It is all part of the plan


That's not the problem at all. Nobody else has fun when players play heavy/medic. It stomps pubs too hard and you shit on your fellow "casuals" who don't know how to counter it and just want to play fun classes that they like to play.

Playing heavy/medic is the polar opposite of casual pubbing.


HEY GUYS I FOUND THE SERIAL KILLER


that is what the corporate slave said.


im guessing the kids who wore the orange safety vests and were just crossing-guards.

in my elementary school it was the 5th graders too(even though it was K-8).

i bet nowadays they have to wear helmets too.


I just want to leave!! Where is the exit!


Pikachu.  Sometimes I watch that, you know.


It does seem to come in handy with all the formal logic, critical thinking and giving one the ability to spot bullshit from ten miles away. :)


I hope you report back - on his **second** Texas Hold'em tournament. All my best.


Youre trashy if you wear them though


way too old for my taste.


Schizophreniacs also tend to suffer from paranoia, so it might be difficult to find one to share with you.


Hahahah no no! I finally won my custody battle! :)


"musician here herp derp"....no one gives a fuck just ask your question


There's a joke where I live that as soon as a local news outlet reports on how low gas prices are, they go up within 24 hours.


Does it matter? He's a billionaire, he doesn't have to share his stuff if he doesn't want to.


Well, I assume the "Pro" name refers to those features being intended for business and professionals, hence the price.


Just talked to her (she's in a different state) and the picture is NOT FAKE. The left pic was taken within hours of lil nugget being born (night before) and the right pic was taken yesterday. I guess the focus on the camera makes this look like a set up.


Most of my classes in high school were taught as memorizing classes, not actual problem solving.  I remember feeling baffled when I was supposed to problem solve once I got into college.


Although it is not nice to comment on her figure, this was to be expected. If you want to cosplay, choose a character that fits your bodytype. You would also laugh if Dirk Novitzky cosplayed as Amumu.


Was that wrong?  Should we not put children in cages?  Because if I had know it was wrong I probably wouldn't have done that.  My bad.


You guys are just sore.


So you work with Ann Coulter?


Easiest/most pathetic way to hate, no respect for that. Honestly I'd rather hear spygate crap, it's more  founded in reality than the "Brady gets special treatment" salt.


Grammer is very impotent


Came here to say that.


Considering they're also an arms manufacture...

...I think [this](https://versatile1.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/boondocks.jpg) will simulate how it will go down.


I will admit, it's surreal upvoting people quoting me.


OH SHIT WE LEFT HIM IN THE TIRE

also: "¡No es bueno^o^o^o!"


Humility thy name is reddit.


Some deep-sea fish have lures attached to their bodies to attract prey. Maybe this was some man-eating fish monster with a woman-shaped lure meant to catch unsuspecting fishermen... Pretty creepy!


So you don't like it when people have a deep respect for things you do not have a deep respect for?

Something something free speech.


LOL HACKED BY BECKY!!!1!11 XD OMG


It was basically the Big Bang Theory without laugh tracks so I'm not the least bit surprised that the average redditor found this funny. You could probably relate to the guy as well as you're a retarded hipster casual.


"Don't talk to strangers, kids."

"So wait, who are you now?"

"SHUT UP AND DO WHAT I TELL YOU."


Wow got a little feisty at the end, perhaps you should listen to your own advice.


Remember the rules for getting girls!

* Be attractive
* Don't be un-attractive


Imagine you were being filmed, adrenaline running, I would've flipped him off twice as hard.


'Dat ash'

EDIT: I still haven't ever recieved a Kobe gif :(


How is it a flop if he actually catches it? I now see where the stereotype of pats fans knowing fuck all about football comes from.


I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! they were very drunk!


There are people who didn't play Oblivion?  It's worth it highly just for Shivering Isles  Quite possibly the best dlc/expansion I have ever seen in a single player game ever.


plot twist: that was the first time he'd even met that woman


Jeesus christ man, alot of this shit happened BEFORE I joined Reddit, so I posted it AFTER it happened. Although this did just happen yesterday.


I hope that at least it was a nice rock


Right sorry for having good hygiene.


STOP IT. I'M GONNA GRADUATE AND ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GONNA LIVE HAPPILY TOGETHER IN ONE GIANT HOUSE. WE CAN'T SEPARATE... we just can't...


Which I wouldn't care about. But unfortunately this is going to affect all the other people that have to deal with her later in life.


YO OBAMA, I'MMA LET YOU FINISH, BUT I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT MARTIN LUTHER KING JR WAS THE BEST NOBEL PRIZE WINNER OF ALL TIME.

Edit: funny that this stupid fucking comment got 1000 upvotes but every other serious conversation in this thread is downvoted despite reddiquette. You're fucking lame, reddit. I'm ashamed of this.


Lol, he sounds like shit compared to yngwie malmsteen. i know speed isnt everything but knopfler's technical skills are laughably basic.


Don't stop you're turning me on


Your novelty account is bad and you should feel bad.

Haha it's downvotes, all the way down. I regret nothing.


Or that anti-gun state senator in CA who got caught running guns for the triads.


i'm not fighting any battle, just saying what i am doing. i'm more than aware of reddit's philosophically and linguistically shallow ideas about "truth", "facts", and "science"


>That was the 9/11 of music.

Worse, they're like the Black Eyed Peas of music.


Says the /r/christianity user.

No Thanks. We do pretty well not having to live under your view of the world outside of the internet.


My female roommate asked me to piss on her once. Walked into my bedroom, said she was gonna go shower and wanted me to piss on her during. Something about her old bf doing it in the shower and she was missing him. I was stunned. Made for a strange living arrangement after.


I agree. No normal man owns mace in the first place. He should of just kicked her in the cunt.


"I’m the President of the United States, and it was only about 8 years ago that I finished paying off my student loans."

^ [Obama](http://twitter.com/BarackObama/statuses/210835185086898176).


I don't want to be a party pooper in this thread, but her parents probably made her do it.


You mean when you as a guy are taking a piss and the hole is stuck together so the pee goes everywhere?

Man I hate it when that happens.


Check his post history. He's an SRD whore, who scoures /r/LGBT, /r/gaymers, and /r/ainbow for 'gay drama' and then posts it all over SRD laughing at our expense.

If he's a mod of a queer subreddit, then all it will ever amount to is cptn_sisko's personal SRD whore house.


Elon musk VS. Scott Manley in KSP for charity :)


So does repeatedly hitting yourself in the bell end with a hammer. Doesn't make it fun though.


This post made me want to cry.


Who the fuck said that? It was bullshit when that happened, and it's even more bullshit other companies haven't learned from it.


Just as a PSA - there's lots of kids in need, and Christmas/Easter/Thanksgiving are popular times to donate, but back-to-school time is often one that's overlooked.


What is your definition of the word racist? Did you know that there are hundreds and hundreds of racially specific organisations in this country. The Metropolitan Black Police Association is one such organisation and The Black Solicitors Network is another organisation. There are many, many more. Are these black organisations racist?


>was looking for places or things to stick my dick in.

Brief compilation of mankind's history.


Most downfedoras I've ever seen


I expected it to be #1


They're not trying to "make you feel inferior or shameful" it's called a joke, they're having a laugh.


She knows he was a virgin. It was likely very obvious. She's trying to help his ego.