Title: Grooming and Red Flag Behaviors - Darkness to Light
Headings: Grooming and Red Flag Behaviors
Grooming and Red Flag Behaviors
Child grooming is a deliberate process by which offenders gradually initiate and maintain sexual relationships with victims in secrecy.
THE STAGES OF GROOMING
RECOGNIZING RED FLAG BEHAVIOR
Special attention/preference to a child
Gift giving
Touching or hugging the child
Sympathetic listener
Offers to help the family
Gaining access via the internet

Content: "You can trust me because no one understands you the way I do." Sexualizing the Relationship
Once emotional dependence and trust have been built, the perpetrator progressively sexualizes the relationship. This occurs through talking, pictures, and creating situations in which both are naked (swimming). The adult exploits the child’s natural curiosity and trust using stimulation to advance the sexual nature of the relationship. "Have you ever masturbated? I can show you how, it feels really good." Maintaining Control
Once sexual abuse is occurring, perpetrators commonly use secrecy, blame, and threats to maintain the child’s participation and continued silence. In order to maintain control, perpetrators use emotional manipulation; they make the child believe they are the only person who can meet their emotional and material needs. The child may feel that the loss of the relationship, or the consequences of exposing it, will be more damaging and humiliating than continuing the unhealthy relationship.