> "to be the strongest person at your father's funeral." kek, thanks for increasing my cringe. to be frank, french people are extremely undemonstrative in formal social contexts (maybe a residue of ritualistic catholic influence) while i think i have often seen american fathers especially tear up easily in front of their children ("i love you so much" etc.) so maybe there is cultural difference at play. if a man were to cry at a funeral i would not judge or condescend at all but i would avoid acknowledging it by handing a tissue or holding him. funerals count among the dire situations i mentioned, and space is to be left for individual histories and nervous systems. if i were to tear up in that context i would rather people ignore it and let me breathe, give it space but not validate it.
France