i hate being autistic so much it's unreal. during every conversation i have to constantly think about the amount of eye contact i'm maintaining, looking away occasionally, or else i completely freak the other person out as they're talking to me. i also have to think about how to walk normally constantly because i never would sway my arms if i wasn't called out for walking like a robot. that's like two of a million exhausting things every day i have to constantly think about as i'm doing it just to maintain a semblance of normality. most people have no idea how exhausting it is for some just to appear human. if i wasn't such a coward, i'd have killed myself as a child. the world is truly better off without subhumans like me. i'm 100% aware of that fact.
United States