peter picklesniffer was all up grown up at age five. at least he felt so. his parents, barbara and sammy (he called them by their first names) didn't think so, but what did that matter? the law might give them say in peters life but peter didn't. and so when ever barbara and sammy tried to butt into his life with crazed advice like get off that roof, or put down that cigarette, or stop tossing those steak knives, he ignored them except for a bronx cheer blown at them with a force that crossed his eyes. sure, barbara and sammy fought back. early bedtimes, no dessert, and endless time-out in one of the time-out rooms (the house had three, one for each floor). but that didn't break him. he wasn't a twix bar. he was a steel rod of zealous defiance. spartacus could have sat at his feet and taken helpful lessons from him on fruitful rebellion.this day barbara was getting on him about wearing pants. peter felt wearing underpants was clothing enough. it was summer for god's sake. why toss on any more clothes than that minimum required for decency and testicular support.? why old man mcguiness walked naked in public parks and seemed happy enough, if a little too happy given his steady drool and giggling. and he noticed that sammy admired women on the internet who liked to wear just underpants, if even that. if sammy admired these women's good common sense about not over doing this dressing business, why couldn't he and barbara not admire peter's?
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