if you fucker her in her ass at all, you guys would be disordered (since the anus is for deficating. oral stuff though is questionable. our mouth aren't just for eating...the majority of our communication is with our mouths and kissing provides a chemical response that leads to procreation, so i wouldn't say oral stuff is outside of the realm of "acceptable intimacy" as long as (as you correctly noted) you finish the act inside of her
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