Proving you are the best StackExchange-User Write one/two program(s)/function(s):

The first one should return a truthy value if given your Stack Exchange username.

~~Optional~~

An obfuscated one (as explained below) that does the same thing.

Rules for number 2:

May be no more than ten times the byte-count of number 1 or 100 bytes, whichever is higher.
Must be written in the same language as number 1.

Test cases
(for my case:)
input        output
-------------------
Seims        true
BestCoderXX  false

Winning
This is code-golf, so shortest byte count for number one wins.
JavaScript
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To run:
Open the console (Ctrl + Shift + I)
Type f =
Paste the above
To use:
f('the string you want to test')
EDIT: fixed ES6 version below
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Note: This checks equality with the username of whoever runs it, not my username