Automated/Controlled Lighting - Options?
See my answer here: What are some scalable, affordable home automation options? for a comparison of different consumer products.

You're probably going to have to do a mix of things to get your first goal. LED lighting is relatively new and immature -- the controllers for it vary from being IR remotes, to physical dials, and so it will be harder to interface with, let alone integrate it into a single system.

For the other goals, you can use something like UBP switches and interfaces. There are (expensive) commercial controllers/interfaces, and there are also cheap computer interfaces that make it easy to control/monitor from a computer. If you know how to program, you should be able to basically anything from there.

I would probably find some LED controller that can be controlled from a computer (or home automation controller) and then interface it together myself, using the commercial UBP stuff for regular lighting and controls.