Debugging a SSIS OleDbCommand
You can check what's going on using SQL Profiler.  When you execute an OLE DB task, you should see something like this as an RPC:Completed event:

declare @p1 int
set @p1=1
exec sp_prepare @p1 output,N'@P1 int',N'update testtable set id = @P1',1
select @p1


In this case, I'm just updating a test table (called testtable).

Then, for each iteration, you'll see an RPC:Completed event which reads something like:

exec sp_execute 1,50


This is saying to execute the first prepared event (our update statement--sp_prepare's first parameter is "1" here), and send in 50 as the new ID for testtable.

If you don't see these calls on your database as you debug your flow, it might indicate that you're actually doing the process on a different instance (or maybe there's something like a trigger preventing your change from occurring?).