Can a Turing machine be both decidable and undecidable relative to itself?
A Turing machine doesn't come with an oracle. The oracle comes from outside. Rather, an oracle Turing machine is a Turing machine that has a special way of accessing an oracle. When you run the Turing machine with a specific oracle $O$, whenever the machine activates the special mechanism for accessing an oracle, you forward the request to $O$. A phrase like "$M$ is an oracle TM with an oracle for $A'_{TM}$" is thus meaningless.

You are saying that you run $D$ on the input $\langle D \rangle$, but you haven't specified what oracle you are running $D$ with. If you want $F$ to have the proper semantics, then you have to run $D$ with an oracle for $A'_{TM}$. When run in this way, $D$ accepts $\langle D \rangle$ iff $F$ rejects $\langle D,D \rangle$ when run with $A'_{TM}$, and so iff $D$ rejects $\langle D \rangle$ when run with $A_{TM}$.

Notice that there is no contradiction: $D$ accepts $\langle D \rangle$ when run with the oracle $A'_{TM}$ iff it rejects $\langle D \rangle$ when run with the oracle $A_{TM}$.

The real reason this works out is that a machine cannot get as input an oracle TM together with an oracle, since the oracle is an infinite object and so it cannot be specified as input.