Question on Divisive Speech
Perhaps, according to Buddhism and modern psychology, it isn't helpful to &quot;speak about it to someone to let off steam&quot;.
If you are in some abusive relationship, then doing something about it (something other that what you have been doing previously) may be healthy; and so, talking enough to understand what's happening, and to make new plans, may be healthy; but &quot;letting off steam&quot; doesn't sound right.
To pick just one example from Google, here's a quote from Psychology Today: You Can't Punch Your Way Out of Anger --
You can’t let off steam with violence.
Posted Sep 24, 2009
As for Buddhism I think there's an obvious quote at the start of the Dhammapada:


&quot;He abused me, he ill-treated me, he got the better of me, he stole my belongings;&quot;... the enmity of those harbouring such thoughts cannot be appeased.

&quot;He abused me, he ill-treated me, he got the better of me, he stole my belongings;&quot;... the enmity of those not harbouring such thoughts can be appeased.



What's &quot;skillful&quot; might depend on how you talk about it and who with; but I at least want to challenge the premise that it &quot;lets off steam&quot; and that that's helpful. Instead of letting off steam it might keep the fire (of anger etc.) burning ... &quot;fanning the flames&quot; if you want a metaphor.