How should a good CX riding position "feel" (alternative to highly scientific measurements...)
Most of your riding is on the hoods.  I race CX, city ride CX, and road ride on a CX.  I spend very little time in the drops.  In the city pretty much no time unless into a head wind.

On the hoods out of the saddle it should feel a lot like a mountain bike but no shock.  Come off a curb out of the saddle.  If you feel like you could go out the top it is too small.

Since you are not used to it you should feel only slightly stretched out.