Correct angle for front light?
Car headlights are more complex than bike lights. The beam is 'shaped' to throw light away from oncoming drivers and has a sharp cutoff on dipped beam. therefore bike lights will always cause a greater degree of glare (for relative brightness) than car lights. 

Point the beam so its shining at the ground about 10-20meters in front, and slightly towards the curb. The faster you go, the higher it needs to be. Curb side is where you need most light, as that is where the glass and rubbish is, and it avoids blinding oncoming motorists. As far as being seen, add a non-directional flashing light and hi-vis gear.