Math journal question - long publishing delay
Do not send a mail to the journal; send it to the editor that handled the paper. They are an academic, so they are going to be more sympathetic and understanding of your deadlines and external constraints. In addition, they have at least some limited power to insist with the production team, and they have a direct interest in their journal's reputation.
And if there is someone that should feel pathetic, I believe, it's whoever receives your e-mail. Two years is really unacceptable even for fields with slow publication times; at least the paper should have appeared as published online (with the word &quot;published&quot; attached to it clearly).