Is there a program I can install to make title/header bars attach to the window?
Way back in the OS 9 days, we could install hacks to do crazy things like recolour windows and move around those window controls, but now they are simply buried too close to the metal to do system-wide. Back in those days too many of these hacks would cause system instability. I'm sure Apple could have built in such customization cleanly in OS X, and indeed in the very early versions I recall some rudimentary functionality for "skinning" — but today having a consistent user interface is viewed by the company as a feature, not a liability.

I found this article with a fairly nice summary of utilities that bring some of the best features of windows to OS X. But unfortunately (fortunately?) adding extra menu bar clutter to every single window or moving the window controls isn't one of them.