Can't connect to ATTINY85
Turns out the ISP header in the image I posted was wrong: 



here's the correct pinout, RESET/GND needed to get 'flipped' with MISO/VCC:



Thank you everybody for helping. Especially ChrisStratton for pointing me the right direction. I can successfully read the fuses without external crystal:

avrdude -c avrisp2 -p t85 -P /dev/ttyACM0 -b 19200 -v -B 250.0
avrdude: AVR device initialized and ready to accept instructions

Reading | ################################################## | 100% 0.07s

avrdude: Device signature = 0x1e930b
avrdude: safemode: lfuse reads as 62
avrdude: safemode: hfuse reads as DF
avrdude: safemode: efuse reads as FF

avrdude: safemode: lfuse reads as 62
avrdude: safemode: hfuse reads as DF
avrdude: safemode: efuse reads as FF
avrdude: safemode: Fuses OK (E:FF, H:DF, L:62)