Generator to home wiring
Sorry to do this, but I'm going to have to come down on this.

DON'T DO IT!

This is one of those, "If you have to ask, you can't afford it," type questions. Only in this case, it's "If you have to ask, somebody's going to get hurt."

Do this right. Hire an electrician and get a transfer switch installed. If you do this yourself, there's a decent chance you'll do something wrong. If so, in the best case you will be killed or seriously injured. Note that this is the best case - auto-Darwinism is, by its nature, self-limiting. Much worse is the possibility that you'll kill a power company worker when you forget to disconnect.

Sorry to be harsh, but you clearly don't know enough to know what to avoid. Don't mess around with this stuff unless you have experience or a mentor who does.