Unnecessary kitchen gadgets: a reference
For reasons I have yet to understand, my parents once bought me what I would have to describe as a manual food processor.  I am not talking about a hand blender, nor am I talking about a chopper (which is what you'll find if you try to google "manual food processor").  It is literally a crank-operated, plastic-encased device that looks like a very small food processor.

To date, I have never found a use for it.  The only reason I even took it out of the box was because the box took up too much space in my cupboard.  I have no idea what this... thing... can do that an ordinary food processor or hand blender can't do about a thousand times better.  I guess, if I ever really need to purée some tuna in the middle of a nationwide blackout, I'll be prepared.

Because I no longer have the box, I have no idea what the name of this product is.
I received this gift over 5 years ago. The guard labels are still on the blades - a testament to just how useless this product turned out to be.