Image Render Works, Animation Render Doesn't
It was a noob problem. I had my local camera set to my camera, but the actual scene camera was my donut's icing...? I think Blender also bugged out, because when I reopened the scene, the regular F12 still image render had the same result.
Anyways, how to fix it:
Go to Scene Properties &gt; Scene &gt; Camera, then you can use the eye dropper to pick the camera you want to use.