blender running so slow i can take a nap when clicking a menu
Sounds like a memory shortage. Add more physical memory to your machine, reduce the complexity of your meshes and particle systems (when allowed) or pay for an outside cloud rendering service.

In any case, it may be more cost effective to just hard-reboot the machine instead of waiting for the File -> Quit menu to show.  I hate hard crashing my machine, but I'd likely get things rebooted, modified however needed, and running at normal render speed sooner than by shutting down properly.

But first, just in case - check if you're running some other apps at the same time that might be hoarding memory.  Email, web browsers loaded with pages with bad javascript, movie players, another instance of Blender.