Millennial text-speak might soon find its way out of your smartphone—and onto your detergent. The multi-national consumer goods maker, Procter & Gamble, have filed trademark applications for four popular acronyms: WTF (what the f***), LOL (laughing out loud), NBD (no big deal), and FML (f*** my life). 
 
 The Cincinnati, Ohio-based P&G; is best known for brands such as Febreze, Dawn, and Tide. The company has applied to use the acronyms on its liquid soap, dishwashing detergent, hard surface cleaners, and air freshers, CNBC reports. 
 
 Attorney Megan Hymore, who is part of P&G;’s senior counsel, made the filings in April of this year, but so far, the outcome is TBD. (That means to be decided, in case you didn’t know. If you want an extensive list of online acronyms to make puns with, you can find one here.) According to Ad Age, the US Patent and Trademark Office has requested clarification regarding the applications, and P&G; has until January to respond. 
 
 While P&G; has yet to comment on the move, it’s likely part of strategy to appeal to younger consumers. Board member Nelson Peltz has previously posited that millennials want brands that they “have an emotional attachment to.” But using familiar language, or language a company assumes its target audiences speak, can sometimes backfire. Remember when Microsoft tried to recruit interns by addressing them as “BAE” (a moniker of affection meaning “before anyone else”)? And the last time that P&G; sparked a millennial trend people started eating Tide pods. 
 
 It’s unclear what P&G;, a company that spent more than $7 billion worldwide on advertising in the fiscal year ending June 2017, will do if the trademark applications are approved. The Cincinnati Business Inquirer mused that WTF will be used “as social media shorthand for ‘Why That’s Febreze.’ But WTHK (‘Who The Heck Knows’)?” 
 
 As for Quartz’s predictions, we think “wow, that’s Febreze!” could be a contender for WTF. Or maybe, “no better detergent” for NBD. We’re going to bet on “freshen my laundry” for FML, and translate LOL to “love over lint.” IDK if P&G; will take our suggestions, though. ||||| Welcome to the latest edition of Marketer's Brief, a quick take on marketing news, moves and trends from Ad Age's reporters and editors. Send tips/suggestions to [email protected] 
 
 Bob Dylan has a new whiskey brand—but he's gotta defend the brand name in court. More on that below, along with details on Oprah's latest Kraft Heinz collaboration and what major U.S. beer brand is now bigger in China than it is in America. Also, find out how major cosmetics brands are having a hard time keeping up with the Kardashians. But first, some trademark news that might make you L.O.L. 
 
 The 411 on P&G; 
 
 If you thought all those texting acronyms couldn't be yanked out of the digital commons and trademarked, forget that. Procter & Gamble Co. has filed for trademarks on household and personal-care use of LOL, WTF, NBD and FML. FWIW, there's no indication products bearing those names exist yet, and P&G; doesn't have trademark approval. The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has sought clarifications from P&G;, which has until January to respond. 
 
 Credit: Procter & Gamble Co. 
 
 Precise uses remain TBD, as P&G; declined to provide TMI. But competitors who might want to use these acronyms may now face FOMO. BTW, despite those old untrue P&G-Satanism; rumors, NBC reported in 2012 that LOL does NOT secretly stand for "Lucifer Our Lord." 
 
 This Bud's for China 
 
 Budweiser might be stuck in a long-term sales slide in the U.S.—but the King of Beers is surging in China. In fact, more Bud is consumed in China today than in the U.S., according to a new report from Rabobank citing figures from GlobalData. An AB InBev spokeswoman confirmed the accuracy of the data. 
 
 Turning the brewer's classic American brands into international powerhouses has been a priority ever since Belgium-based InBev acquired St. Louis-based Anheuser-Busch in 2008, creating AB InBev. Rabobank credits the brewer's multichannel strategy in China, including distributing beer through modern retail stores like Hema and Super Species, as well as its advertising on platforms including Weibo. 
 
 Revlon can't keep up 
 
 There was long that lingering suspicion that in the circular logic of social celebrity, the Kardashians were famous only for being famous. Well forget that. They now can be famous for wrecking much of the mass cosmetics business last quarter. Tarang Amin, CEO of cosmetics marketer E.L.F., earlier this month cited "growth of mega-influencer-driven brands" in part for somewhat disappointing top-line results. 
 
 Without naming names, the two top mega-influencers in cosmetics over the past 18 months have been Kylie Jenner (Kylie Cosmetics) and Kim Kardashian West (KKW Cosmetics). Coty (CoverGirl) and Revlon posted declining North American mass cosmetics sales last quarter, and while they didn't blame the Kardashian-Jenner industrial complex, it probably took a toll. Forbes recently pegged Jenner's net worth $900 million, $800 million of which stems from the cosmetics. She may be having a bigger effect on packaged goods than sister Kendall did with that Pepsi video. 
 
 Knockin' on the courtroom door 
 
 Like many celebrities, Bob Dylan has his own liquor, a whiskey brand named Heaven's Door that he launched earlier this year. 
 
 Heavens Door whiskey 
 
 But now the folk singer must defend the brand name from a legal challenge brought by Heaven Hill Distilleries, which says the name sounds too similar to its Heaven Hill whiskey. The Louisville Courier Journal has more on the trademark infringement lawsuit that was filed last week in federal court. 
 
 Super sized pasta 
 
 Olive Garden's Never Ending Pasta Pass—weeks of all-you-can-eat pasta, plus soup or salad and breadsticks for about $100—goes on sale Aug. 23. This year, apparently in honor of America's, ahem, growing appetite for the offer, there's an even more gluttonous version. Olive Garden plans to sell 1,000 52-week passes, for $300 each plus tax. The more traditional Never Ending Pasta Pass, which lasts eight weeks, is $100 plus tax. And there are more of those—23,000. Last year, Olive Garden offered 22,000 of the $100 eight-week passes, in honor of the 22nd anniversary of its Never Ending Pasta Bowl special, as well as 50 trips for two to Italy for $200. 
 
 Pumping up 
 
 KFC enlisted its brawniest colonel yet to promote the new Double Crispy Colonel sandwich, which is its Crispy Colonel sandwich with a second fried chicken fillet. Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson, the world's strongest man, apparently set a world's record for pulling the most chicken sandwiches at one time in an arm-over-arm pull by dragging a giant box of sandwiches, weighing more than 700 pounds, across a floor. Of course, KFC had him dressed as the chain's founder and captured the feat on video. ||||| Procter and Gamble wants to trademark three-letter acronyms including 'LOL' and 'WTF' to use in an unlikely category: dishwashing detergents and soap. 
 
 P&G, owner of brands such as Febreze, Tide and Mr Clean, has applied to the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to use 'LOL' (which stands for Laughing Out Loud), 'WTF' (What The F---), 'NBD' (No Big Deal) and 'FML' (F--- My Life). 
 
 P&G has applied to use the four acronyms in liquid soap, dishwashing detergent, hard surface cleaners and air fresheners. ||||| Targeting a particular generation in an advertising campaign is not a new strategy, especially with millennials. This generation has been fodder for negative stereotyping and endless jokes. 
 
 Whether these stereotypes are fitting is negotiable. What isn’t up for debate is this generation’s immense spending power of more than $200 billion annually. Numbers like these understandably make this age demographic a coveted audience for marketers, although not many succeed in acquiring this thrifty audience. 
 
 The majority of the millennial generation has grown up in a world inundated with flashy advertising sometimes just five inches from their face on mobile screens. Reportedly, 74 percent of this generation spends at least five hours per week engaged with online content, according to Content Science Review. 
 
 This onslaught of media has massively desensitized millennials to any traditional advertising strategies. As a result, marketers have turned to unconventional or informal ways to engage with millennials without selling something outright. However, mastering a strategy that caters to this demographic is more uncommon than not. 
 
 Let’s look at some of the biggest marketing fails when targeting millennials to see what went wrong so that your brand doesn’t have the misfortunate of repeating these mistakes. 
 
 Chevy understands the millennial lifestyle 
 
 Millennials are often oversimplified as one cohesive group of trendy, bearded, purple-haired hipsters with their smartphones permanently attached to their palms. This description is only fitting for a small percentage of the 75 million people who make up this generation. 
 
 This generation includes a diverse range of races, cultures and ages. In fact, it is one of the most diverse generations to date. According to research by the Brookings Institution, millennials—those between the ages of 18 and 34—are 55.8 percent white and almost 30 percent “new minority,” which includes Asian, Hispanic and those of two or more races. 
 
 Furthermore, the nomadic, freelance lifestyle that millennials live reportedly only describes 26 percent of millennials, making them the stark minority. 
 
 Thus, it’s easy to see how a car company aiming a commercial at such a large demographic ends up buying into these generational stereotypes. While the ad concludes with the Chevy marketer jokingly tossing away the cheesy ideas, in the end, this does nothing to lift the reductive portrayal of millennials. 
 
 AudienceBoom CEO Jason DeMers said, “It’s also a good idea to avoid targeting the millennial audience as a general niche. Instead, narrow your engagement by targeting highly specific niche audiences and interacting with your users on an individual level whenever possible.” 
 
 Chevy’s commercial was so heavily panned by audiences that even a parody version was made. 
 
 The lesson we learned from Chevy’s marketing fail: Figure out how your product might fit into their generational experience. Millennials, more than any other generation, have absorbed more knowledge about more diverse cultures and seen more places (even if through a computer screen) on opposite ends of the world. As a result, this is a generation that loves to find new experiences. 
 
 A better way for Chevy to market its car to millennials would have been to create roadmaps of various cross-country road trips for people looking for summer vacation activities. This extra touch would provide the value of a new experience to millennials all while advertising the car as the best option to take them on this experience. 
 
 Hillary wants to talk about it in three emojis or less 
 
 This attempt to engage with a generation that mainly spans from 18 through 34 is not easy to take seriously. 
 
 First, Hillary Clinton’s marketing team misunderstands the role that emojis and other digital multimedia play in online conversations. 
 
 While many enjoy expressing a mood with a GIF or any emoji, a discussion on student loan debt isn’t commonly a place where one would insert emojis. 
 
 Continue Reading
– Acronym-heavy news reports are proliferating after a recent development regarding Procter & Gamble. Ad Age reports that the consumer-goods behemoth has put in the paperwork for the rights to use four well-known letter combinations—WTF, LOL, NBD (which stands for "no big deal"), and FML ("f--- my life")—in association with some of its products. Per CNBC, those items would include air fresheners, dishwashing detergent, liquid soap, and hard-surface cleaners. Quartz reports the trademark applications were filed in April, and that P&G now has until January to respond to requests for clarification by the US Patent and Trademark Office. There's no apparent sign that any P&G products exist yet using these acronyms in their names. CNBC muses that P&G likely wants to employ these acronyms to reach a demographic that might not be as interested in cleaning supplies and other household items as others: millennials. Quartz notes that going the millennial-friendly route has sometimes gone awry for brands, but it still plays the guessing game as to how P&G may wield these the acronyms, with WTF being a possibility for "Wow, that's Febreze!" and "NBD" serving as a stand-in for "no better detergent," among other suggestions. TBC....