I don’t claim to be an expert on dealing with grief and loss, but I hope that I can be of some help. A pamphlet that helped me tremendously is available from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. Don’t minimize the loss, and don’t be afraid to talk about the loss. 2  However, don’t give cliches or easy answers. 3  Allow the bereaved person to grieve for as long or as short as they need.