7. goober. A goober is one of those little fat kids with ambiguous gender, red lips, rosy cheeks, a shiny bowl-cut, and maybe a little food on his/her face. A goober always has a big, stupid smile on its face, and has a dumb, gargly laugh. It wears one-color, oversized pastel-colored shirts, and shorts without pockets, and Sketchers. oh man, that's one funny lookin kid. yeah i don't let my children play with goobers either.