There are, of course, problems associated with being a movie geek like me. One is the tendency to get neurotically attached to the work of favorite actors and directors, to become emotionally involved with their work. They become like family, and there is nothing more irritating than a family member disappointing one.
Director Tim Burton [Batman, Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow] is one of my favorites. His new, 'reimagined' version of Planet of the Apes is weak. So, I wasn't merely disappointed, I was angry. How could Tim do this to me? What was he thinking? Why would anyone so imaginative even think of redoing a classic? How could he bring shame to the 'family'? Yet, what difference can my feelings make? Burton doesn't know me from Adam.
In this version of Planet of the Apes, Capt. Leo Davidson [Mark Wahlberg] is part of a space mission that is studying the effectiveness of training primates to pilot small space craft. [Don't ask.] When one of the chimps gets lost in a freak magnetic storm, Davidson goes after him. He, too, gets lost and winds up on a planet where apes rule and human beings are the lesser species. He does battle with the apes. Aided by Ari [Helena Bonham-Carter], a kind ape and sort of an animal rights activist in reverse, he escapes, along with a band of humans. Ari helps Davidson and the others find the apes' sacred city, where Davidson hopes to rendezvous with his spacecraft.
The movie shifts between comedy, satire and serious action-adventure, leaving the viewer to think that the director was uncertain about which direction his 'reimagining' was supposed to go.
Big budget Hollywood spectacles aren't expected to be realistic, but Planet of the Apes completely disregards anything even remotely logical. Davidson crash lands into the planet. He must have been going three hundred miles an hour. He walks away. Minutes later, he encounters the ape army for the first time. One soldier hits him hard enough to throw him about thirty yards. Another then kicks him hard in the head with his heavy boot. Our hero cannot only still get up and walk, he hasn't a single scratch nor even a hair out of place. It's a ridiculous scene and a prime example of bad screen writing.
Walhberg's Davidson is a curiously flat hero. Burton has 'reimagined' him as a character with absolutely no imagination. He's not even curious as to why the apes speak English, a fact that would astound most people. He shows little desire to help free his fellow human beings from bondage. He cares only about escaping from the planet and, by extension, only about himself. If he's the hero of the future, I don't like him much. When he achieves his objective and gets back to Earth, the climatic scene there is simply a blatant setup for a sequel.
Visually, Burton hasn't lost his touch. This is a lush and handsome movie, filled with the rich, dark tones that are the director's signature. The apes are realistic. They are ingeniously designed so that they are easy to tell apart from one another. I loved the way they reverted to ape behavior whenever they got angry. Oddly, this was one of their more human characteristics. But none of these pluses makes up for a lame story and a lack of vision. I can highly recommend Planet of the Apes - the original 1968 version, that is.
There are, of course, problems associated with being a movie geek like me. One is the tendency to get neurotically attached to the work of favorite actors and directors, to become emotionally involved with their work. They become like family, and there is nothing more irritating than a family member disappointing one. Director Tim Burton [Batman, Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow] is one of my favorites. His new, 'reimagined' version of Planet of the Apes is weak. So, I wasn't merely disappointed, I was angry. How could Tim do this to me? What was he thinking? Why would anyone so imaginative even think of redoing a classic? How could he bring shame to the 'family'? Yet, what difference can my feelings make? Burton doesn't know me from Adam. In this version of Planet of the Apes, Capt. Leo Davidson [Mark Wahlberg] is part of a space mission that is studying the effectiveness of training primates to pilot small space craft. [Don't ask. ] When one of the chimps gets lost in a freak magnetic storm, Davidson goes after him. He, too, gets lost and winds up on a planet where apes rule and human beings are the lesser species. He does battle with the apes. Aided by Ari [Helena Bonham-Carter], a kind ape and sort of an animal rights activist in reverse, he escapes, along with a band of humans. Ari helps Davidson and the others find the apes' sacred city, where Davidson hopes to rendezvous with his spacecraft. The movie shifts between comedy, satire and serious action-adventure, leaving the viewer to think that the director was uncertain about which direction his 'reimagining' was supposed to go. Big budget Hollywood spectacles aren't expected to be realistic, but Planet of the Apes completely disregards anything even remotely logical. Davidson crash lands into the planet. He must have been going three hundred miles an hour. He walks away. Minutes later, he encounters the ape army for the first time. One soldier hits him hard enough to throw him about thirty yards. Another then kicks him hard in the head with his heavy boot. Our hero cannot only still get up and walk, he hasn't a single scratch nor even a hair out of place. It's a ridiculous scene and a prime example of bad screen writing. Walhberg's Davidson is a curiously flat hero. Burton has 'reimagined' him as a character with absolutely no imagination. He's not even curious as to why the apes speak English, a fact that would astound most people. He shows little desire to help free his fellow human beings from bondage. He cares only about escaping from the planet and, by extension, only about himself. If he's the hero of the future, I don't like him much. When he achieves his objective and gets back to Earth, the climatic scene there is simply a blatant setup for a sequel. Visually, Burton hasn't lost his touch. This is a lush and handsome movie, filled with the rich, dark tones that are the director's signature. The apes are realistic. They are ingeniously designed so that they are easy to tell apart from one another. I loved the way they reverted to ape behavior whenever they got angry. Oddly, this was one of their more human characteristics. But none of these pluses makes up for a lame story and a lack of vision. I can highly recommend Planet of the Apes - the original 1968 version, that is.