It had been four years since I last gave a thought to playing a game on my gamecube. Those were different days; before $80 starting prices and fifteen different pre-order editions. I had hoped that a glimpse into these long-passed days of yore would bring me some sort of teary nostalgia for the halcyonic days of my tender youth. I chose this. Now, I am a colder and wiser man
 To say this game is bad would be akin to saying that a land war in Russia in Winter is a "bad idea". It utterly fails to encapsulate the monstrous entirety of the situation. We also find ourselves in the rocket shoes of a character so trite, every 13 year old boy has had at least one OC identical to this.
The gameplay is similar to having a fever dream after taking a solid hit of LSD. The Kafkaesque nightmare doesn't end until you choose between one of the three linear morality-based missions. Ooh, how absolutist of you, Sonic Team.
The gunplay reminds me of when I took my sister's Polly Pockets and taped G.I. Joe guns to their hands. And I honestly need say no more.
So, if your vacuous lifestyle demands you buy this game: go for it. But thou art warned- even among the garbage that is everything Sonic, this is truly fecal.
It had been four years since I last gave a thought to playing a game on my gamecube. Those were different days; before $80 starting prices and fifteen different pre-order editions. I had hoped that a glimpse into these long-passed days of yore would bring me some sort of teary nostalgia for the halcyonic days of my tender youth. I chose this. Now, I am a colder and wiser man
 To say this game is bad would be akin to saying that a land war in Russia in Winter is a "bad idea". It utterly fails to encapsulate the monstrous entirety of the situation. We also find ourselves in the rocket shoes of a character so trite, every 13 year old boy has had at least one OC identical to this. The gameplay is similar to having a fever dream after taking a solid hit of LSD. The Kafkaesque nightmare doesn't end until you choose between one of the three linear morality-based missions. Ooh, how absolutist of you, Sonic Team. The gunplay reminds me of when I took my sister's Polly Pockets and taped G. I. Joe guns to their hands. And I honestly need say no more. So, if your vacuous lifestyle demands you buy this game: go for it. But thou art warned- even among the garbage that is everything Sonic, this is truly fecal.