"Dear God, please let this horrible game be a figment of my imagination"

Nope, it's real.  What an unbelievable piece of overrated garbage Super Mario Bros. 3 is.  For the life of me I don't get the appeal of this game.  Through each of the eight boring worlds it's just the same thing every time: run to the end of each and every extremely short, uncreative level collecting worthless crap so you can move on to the next short, uncreative level.  Super Mario Bros. 3 is complete baboon poop.  It really is.  Nothing good about this game at all.  No reason for Mario or video game fans to remember this crappy adventure.  No reason for this game to exist.  Thank God there are sensible people out there such as myself to give you the honest truth.

Let's get right to the point and talk about all the stinky things:

One, and this is the biggest reason Super Mario Bros. 3 isn't any good.  You can only play as Mario and Luigi.  In Super Mario Bros. 2 you can play as the Princess and Toad in addition to Mario and Luigi.  Not so here.  In this game, Mario and Luigi don't even have anything unique to separate the two, so they are basically the same exact person (except Mario is red and Luigi is green).  Remember how high Luigi can jump in Super Mario Bros. 2?  Well now he jumps just like Mario.  Absolutely no reason for this.  If anything, Luigi should have MANY more interesting things about him this time around since, after all, Super Mario Bros. 3 comes AFTER Super Mario Bros. 2 and you'd think the most logical thing would be to continue adding MORE things with each new series.  But in this case, you get less.  I guess Nintendo FORGOT to make Luigi stand apart from Mario.

Another problem: this game is so freakin' predictable.  Gee, after the desert world I go to... a water world?  You don't say!  What?  There's an ICE world and a plant world coming up?  No way!  And what's THIS I see?  The final world will be BIG DARK EVIL FIRE WORLD?  I didn't see THAT coming.  Thanks Nintendo, for making Mario fans look like complete idiots.  Way to go.

Other serious problems become noticeable after a couple hours of playtime such as the fact that you have to do so much boring jumping in this game.  You have to jump on top of (or over) SO many things that it becomes an absolute chore after world 3 (if you even MAKE it that far without shutting off the game, that is).  If you find anything exciting about jumping over pipes or jumping on top of goombas or picking up and kicking buzzy beetles, then I recommend seeking professional help.

Ok, what else makes Super Mario Bros. 3 suck so much?  It can't get any worse, right?  Yes it can.  After you beat the game a message comes up on the screen that says "Thank you, but our princess is in another castle.  Just kidding, hahaha".  You mean to tell me, after all that long, hard and tedious work making it to the very end, Nintendo is going to joke around and make like the adventure isn't over yet?  Before the "just kidding" part, you might very well rip apart your controller or punch a hole in your TV screen all because Nintendo wants to play around and pretend there's still more to the adventure.  I can't even think of appropriate words to describe how angry this makes me.  Tears of anger are almost dripping down my face.  Nintendo NEVER should have done that.  I bet that most people who first seen that message really thought the princess was in another castle and came THIS close to killing the nearest living thing next to them.  Bad Nintendo.

And guess what?  You have to face one of Bowser's kids at the end of every world.  I'm not kidding.  I was honestly expecting to fight Bowser's WIFE before fighting him, but it never happened.  That's probably for the better.  Who knows how horrific she looks.

I'm still trying to figure out what everyone sees in this game.  It's old and forgettable.  Honestly, I think nowadays the only people who enjoy Super Mario Bros. 3 are older folks whose children have moved away to college or to start a family, and they left behind their NES and Super Mario Bros. 3 cartridge so their parents had something to do.  All these older folks miraculously happen to enjoy the game so now EVERYONE acts like it's the best game of all-time.  Well it's not.
"Dear God, please let this horrible game be a figment of my imagination"

Nope, it's real. What an unbelievable piece of overrated garbage Super Mario Bros. 3 is. For the life of me I don't get the appeal of this game. Through each of the eight boring worlds it's just the same thing every time: run to the end of each and every extremely short, uncreative level collecting worthless crap so you can move on to the next short, uncreative level. Super Mario Bros. 3 is complete baboon poop. It really is. Nothing good about this game at all. No reason for Mario or video game fans to remember this crappy adventure. No reason for this game to exist. Thank God there are sensible people out there such as myself to give you the honest truth. Let's get right to the point and talk about all the stinky things:

One, and this is the biggest reason Super Mario Bros. 3 isn't any good. You can only play as Mario and Luigi. In Super Mario Bros. 2 you can play as the Princess and Toad in addition to Mario and Luigi. Not so here. In this game, Mario and Luigi don't even have anything unique to separate the two, so they are basically the same exact person (except Mario is red and Luigi is green). Remember how high Luigi can jump in Super Mario Bros. 2? Well now he jumps just like Mario. Absolutely no reason for this. If anything, Luigi should have MANY more interesting things about him this time around since, after all, Super Mario Bros. 3 comes AFTER Super Mario Bros. 2 and you'd think the most logical thing would be to continue adding MORE things with each new series. But in this case, you get less. I guess Nintendo FORGOT to make Luigi stand apart from Mario. Another problem: this game is so freakin' predictable. Gee, after the desert world I go to... a water world? You don't say! What? There's an ICE world and a plant world coming up? No way! And what's THIS I see? The final world will be BIG DARK EVIL FIRE WORLD? I didn't see THAT coming. Thanks Nintendo, for making Mario fans look like complete idiots. Way to go. Other serious problems become noticeable after a couple hours of playtime such as the fact that you have to do so much boring jumping in this game. You have to jump on top of (or over) SO many things that it becomes an absolute chore after world 3 (if you even MAKE it that far without shutting off the game, that is). If you find anything exciting about jumping over pipes or jumping on top of goombas or picking up and kicking buzzy beetles, then I recommend seeking professional help. Ok, what else makes Super Mario Bros. 3 suck so much? It can't get any worse, right? Yes it can. After you beat the game a message comes up on the screen that says "Thank you, but our princess is in another castle. Just kidding, hahaha". You mean to tell me, after all that long, hard and tedious work making it to the very end, Nintendo is going to joke around and make like the adventure isn't over yet? Before the "just kidding" part, you might very well rip apart your controller or punch a hole in your TV screen all because Nintendo wants to play around and pretend there's still more to the adventure. I can't even think of appropriate words to describe how angry this makes me. Tears of anger are almost dripping down my face. Nintendo NEVER should have done that. I bet that most people who first seen that message really thought the princess was in another castle and came THIS close to killing the nearest living thing next to them. Bad Nintendo. And guess what? You have to face one of Bowser's kids at the end of every world. I'm not kidding. I was honestly expecting to fight Bowser's WIFE before fighting him, but it never happened. That's probably for the better. Who knows how horrific she looks. I'm still trying to figure out what everyone sees in this game. It's old and forgettable. Honestly, I think nowadays the only people who enjoy Super Mario Bros. 3 are older folks whose children have moved away to college or to start a family, and they left behind their NES and Super Mario Bros. 3 cartridge so their parents had something to do. All these older folks miraculously happen to enjoy the game so now EVERYONE acts like it's the best game of all-time. Well it's not.