▁think ▁there ' s ▁a ▁line ▁drawn ▁between ▁gay ▁and ▁que er , ▁and ▁for ▁me , ▁que er ▁describes ▁something ▁that ' s ▁more ▁inclus ive ▁of ▁the ▁grey ▁areas ." ▁ ▁In ▁ 1 9 9 9 , ▁author ▁Douglas ▁A . ▁Martin ▁published ▁a ▁novel , ▁Out line ▁of ▁My ▁L over , ▁in ▁which ▁the ▁narr ator ▁has ▁a ▁six - year ▁rom antic ▁relationship ▁with ▁the ▁un named ▁lead ▁singer ▁of ▁a ▁successful ▁Ath ens , ▁Georgia - based , ▁rock ▁band ; ▁the ▁book ▁was ▁widely ▁spec ulated , ▁and ▁later ▁confirmed ▁by ▁its ▁author , ▁to ▁have ▁been ▁a ▁roman ▁à ▁cle f ▁based ▁on ▁a ▁real ▁relationship ▁between ▁Martin ▁and ▁St ipe . ▁The ▁two ▁had ▁previously ▁collabor ated ▁on ▁two ▁books , ▁both ▁in ▁ 1 9 9 8 : ▁The ▁Ha iku ▁Year ▁( for ▁which ▁the ▁two ▁had ▁both ▁contributed ▁ha iku ) ▁and ▁Martin ' s ▁book ▁of ▁poetry ▁Serv icing ▁the ▁Sal am ander ▁( for ▁which ▁St ipe ▁took ▁the ▁cover ▁photograph ). ▁ ▁Musical ▁style ▁ ▁St ipe ▁poss esses ▁a ▁bar it one ▁vocal ▁range . ▁His ▁role ▁in ▁the ▁song writing ▁process ▁for ▁R . E . M . ▁was ▁to ▁write ▁lyr ics ▁and ▁dev ise ▁mel od ies . ▁While ▁each ▁member ▁was ▁given ▁an ▁equal ▁vote ▁in ▁the ▁song writing ▁process , ▁Peter ▁Buck ▁has ▁conced ed ▁that ▁St ipe , ▁as ▁the ▁band ' s ▁ly ric ist , ▁could ▁rarely ▁be