Heroin in Wales: Caring for dad 'led to habit'
As new figures show a rise in the number of opiate-related deaths in Wales, one man reveals the horror of becoming a heroin addict, and how he managed to turn his life around.
By Gemma RyallBBC News Caring for a father who was doubly incontinent was too much for Gareth Joseph - he says it was the catalyst that pushed him into becoming a heroin addict. At the time he was about 30 and had only ever used drugs recreationally. But when his mother - usually his father's main carer - had to go to hospital, her son had to step in to help. "I found that very, very difficult - the changing of adult nappies and catheter bags and feeding him," he said. "And within my repertoire of behaviours was drug taking and using opiates and heroin to help me enjoy myself - but I started using it then to cope and that was the big tipping point. "So by the time my mother came out of hospital I had my first heroin habit." He said taking the opiate drug at first helped him to cope. "I was able to do those unpleasant tasks that I felt very uncomfortable with - but I was able to do them with a smile on my face and without having that inner turmoil going on," he said. "So it was very, very helpful at the time but, obviously, the consequences were appalling for not just the immediate aftermath but for many years afterwards." 'Shaking with fear' He said his addiction became all-encompassing. "It's terrifying because every night you go to bed, if you haven't got enough heroin for the morning, it's actually physically terrifying," he recalled. "You're actually shaking with fear because you don't know how you're going to get through the next day. "You're completely dependent - every single thing that you do is geared towards the obtaining and the use and the reobtaining of the drugs. So your whole life becomes centred on just finding that." In the midst of his addiction, he went to prison twice - the first time for supplying heroin. The second time, he decided it was time to turn his life around. "I was fortunate in that I met up with other people who were of a like mind," he said "They didn't want to go back to using either so we all kept each other strong while in prison. Even though you're in prison, there's a great availability of drugs in prison. "And when I got out I made sure that I found support and I was lucky enough to find a support group that was eventually to become the organisation that is today Recovery Cymru." Mr Joseph has been in recovery for eight years and now works for Recovery Cymru, a support group for addicts in Cardiff, and uses his experience to try to help others. He is concerned figures show the proportion of deaths in Wales connected to opiates - such as heroin - was 50% higher than England last year. It is a problem that has been growing and the Welsh Government said tackling the issue is a priority. "One death is too many," said Mr Joseph, adding he would tell any addict: "As soon as you realise you have a problem, seek support. "There's support out there. It's not always easy to find but go to your doctor, come to a place like us..." He added: "If you don't make significant changes in your life and you don't seek support then it's almost inevitable that you'll fall back into bad habits. "Something will come along - life is full of ups and downs and the downs are the things that addicts cope with using drugs or alcohol."