evidence: In fact, it was so stupid that my brain sort of shut off while I was watching and I’m having serious trouble coming up with anything useful to say. Did I already mention that Vin Diesel fights The Rock? Basically, if that sounds good to you, you’re gonna love this movie. Otherwise, steer clear. But if you feel like reading on, be warned that my mind is not firing on all six cylinders. Five Fast Five Furious picks up where the last one left off (as if anyone’s keeping track), with Dom (Vin Diesel) in jail. It takes all of 30 seconds for some stunt driving to flip the prison transport bus he’s on, sending Dom twirling towards freedom–and man does it flip, over and over and over and over, until it comes to its final resting place. Boom: title screen. What an opening. Though there were only 6 people in the theater, it immediately filled with cheers. The movie must have anticipated my fear for all those poor prisoners’ lives, for shortly after the title, we get a news report assuring us that no one was harmed. Dom and co. would never hurt an innocent prisoner.