It has been almost a year now, and still it feels that yesterday I could call you mine, even though you never were. The pain doesnt fade, it doesnt transform; it only lingers, ready to surface every time the faintest hint of you or my memories of you comes by. Not a day passes that Im not reminded of what I lost, of the confidence I had at that time, when there was more to me than an empty shell, when I thought happiness was not a silly  and unreachable dream.